I want him to talk to me!

[kizzmoii]

So, my ex and I broke up last week. It was a weird conversation, because i'm not sure what sparked this, other than me not wanting to constantly reassure him that I want to be with him. I noticed myself that I did hold back a bit - we weren't together for a long time btw - but that reason was because I was scared of being in a relationship again. We had some choice words for another and basically ended it all with that we should delete our numbers.

Now, I can't stand fighting with him or not be able to talk to him. It just have this feeling that doesn't sit well and have to have to be on somewhat OK terms with him. Never had that before. I understand that I miss him and this is recently, but I want him to at least know that I miss him and hate not be able to talk him him. I get that time and space is needed, but seriously.. how long? I sound selfish for saying that I don't want him to move on, nor do I want to myself and I am currently hanging out with a different guy, who I don't want to mislead on me wanting to be with him, when I actually want my ex. I never been in love, nor do I think I am in love with my ex, but I need some advice on how to go around of talking to him again (so that he responds) and how long to wait? of course I don't want to sound desperate. Because I'm not.

Please, only answers that can actually be helpful and not just rude.

[HDBadger]

Yes, you're being selfish, and yes, you sound desperate.

Leave the poor guy alone. If he wants to talk to you he will.

Otherwise move on with your life.

[DerekDrake]

Well a girl said to me that she wanted to "hear my voice" and I immediately fell for that despite my last statement to her was "don't wanna talk". She was smart though, if she used the word talk I would have ignored that call. Maybe it's just me.

If you were me, I'd use funny jokes to initiate. The joke that I used to tell her all the time.

[Agnus]

Here's another one who doesn't want to talk.

[basilandthyme]

Stop toying with him. Let him go so that he can move on.

[Boisdevie]

I want him to talk to me!

I want things too. I want a Ducati motorbike for Xmas. Not going to happen.
Why not just accept that sometimes you don't get what you want?

[bubble]

Right now you actually are being selfish. You don't want him as a boyfriend, but you miss the perks of having him around and available to you. It's normal to miss him and to want to spend time with him, but how is he meant to get over you? If you two are meant to be friends, you will be, but both of you need time to get out of the relationship mindset. One week is definitely not enough and maybe he's not even interested in having you in his life as a friend. Whatever his choice is, you'll have to respect it, be it less time, more time, or never to talk to you again.

[Wakeup]

I never been in love, nor do I think I am in love with my ex, but I need some advice on how to go around of talking to him again (so that he responds)

So, it's Allllllllll ABOUT YOU!.

Please, take this time to grow and learn that sometimes in life we don't get to act out without reaping the consequences of our actions. You don't love him, you don't even want him for a boyfriend so learn to love yourself so that you don't keep pushing good people away from you.

Leave him alone and reflect on this and your last relationship so that you've learned the lessons that they were meant to teach you. This kind of thing will keep happening to you if you fail to learn from your last fiasco in dating and change up how you relate to men, love and romantic partnerships.

Adding: I hope he's smart enough to ignore any "I want to hear your voice" manipulation tactics. Sheesh. You don't love him, leave him alone. You would tell your own son that if a girl like you wanted to keep him engaged but didn't even love him.

Being friends with an ex is just fear of being alone and more times then not, any new gf/bf will not take kindly to ex lovers still being friends so move on, sista.

[kizzmoii]

No... I said this wrong. The whole reaaon why I CARE so much is that I want my ex. Not particularly as just a friend...
I wljust meant I wouldnt mind being friends. I want him as in I want to be able to do the things we did like bf and gf.
And the reaaon why I was think I don't love him..is that it takes a long as time to trust and love someone.
I'm just saying..is it all that bad to be able to say to him..hey, I miss you?

[bubble]

Well then maybe you should take some time to figure out how you actually feel about this guy. Don't pull him back into a relationship only to discover you actually don't love him and eventually fall for someone else. If after long consideration you feel that he is the guy for you, then by all means be honest with him and tell him that. But also give him a chance to make his own decision and respect that decision.

[Wakeup]

No... I said this wrong. The whole reaaon why I CARE so much is that I want my ex. Not particularly as just a friend...
I wljust meant I wouldnt mind being friends. I want him as in I want to be able to do the things we did like bf and gf.
And the reaaon why I was think I don't love him..is that it takes a long as time to trust and love someone.
I'm just saying..is it all that bad to be able to say to him..hey, I miss you?

Are you that selfish that you'd want to keep him on the hook when you don't even love him? Move on and stop seeing ANY men until you figure out what you want. You are self-absorbed to toy with him or any other boyzzzzz like you have this one.

[Abdovic]

if you lose someone be honest with him you, you will not like it if someone do like this to you,