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Thread: Lied About His Identity

  1. #1
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    Lied About His Identity

    Met a guy online about a month ago. We've gone out twice, but communicate daily in between dates.

    We have a ton in common, he's about my age, and he's attractive. And...very wealthy. Like, VERY.

    Anyhow...he told me his full name, but I finally got around to googling him last night, as the third date is fast approaching, which means nookie, and I wanted to be sure he was on the level.

    Turns out - there is no one in the world with a name even remotely similar. Not even close.

    So, last night, I called him out on it. Over text, I asked him who he really was, since his name doesn't exist. He said he does exist. I said I am a trust but verify person, and no, he doesn't. He said he could appreciate my caution, but that I was overthinking it. I asked if there was something he wanted to tell me, and he said, "yes, good night til morning" (this convo occurred at 4AM - I don't sleep well - lol).

    Anyhow, I haven't heard from him since. Not a peep. Which is very unusual, as he contacts me daily, many times throughout the day.

    Am I being paranoid, or is it just too obvious that he has something to hide?

  2. #2
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    Why in God's name would you assume his name would show up in a google serach?. Not everyone's does. you probably blew it!!

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    Not just a google search. He doesn't appear in ANY of the advanced people search engines, which, everyone does if they've ever owned real estate, had a job, etc.

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    I think you're insane.
    “The willingness to accept responsibility for one’s own life is the source from which self-respect springs.” ~Joan Didion

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    LOL. I got my answer after I posted about who he really is anyhow, and it was no where close to who he claimed to be. Sadly, I hated to be right about him.

    Insane? Naw...more like accurate.

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    Nope, I'm sticking to my first impression. lol

    BTW: How did you get your answer?
    “The willingness to accept responsibility for one’s own life is the source from which self-respect springs.” ~Joan Didion

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    Quote Originally Posted by namemyname View Post
    Not just a google search. He doesn't appear in ANY of the advanced people search engines, which, everyone does if they've ever owned real estate, had a job, etc.
    That's not true for people in Canada. We have privacy laws in place that wouldn't show you anything much. Maybe a Class Reunion type site if one was to join but that's about it.
    “The willingness to accept responsibility for one’s own life is the source from which self-respect springs.” ~Joan Didion

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    Well, I think you're a nasty cunt, so I guess we're kinda even.

    My friend who's a PI found out for me. I had just enough info to make him identifiable for those with legal connections.

    He's married, and has a family in another state. I knew he had something to hide.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Wakeup View Post
    I think you're insane.
    On the contrary, she's quite sane. Doing a search of an unknown person is pretty standard these days.

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    Quote Originally Posted by HeartIsAching View Post
    On the contrary, she's quite sane. Doing a search of an unknown person is pretty standard these days.
    I do it for anyone I'm dating. I think it's smart to know who you're dealing with. Sooo many people lie online these days. Why not protect yourself?

    I also think the fact he didn't contact me at all was his admission he was caught.

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    I think the fact he didn't contact you was because he thought he dodged a bullet. Doing an online search is one thing. Accusing someone of not being who they are just because you couldn't bring them up in google is quite another. Thats how I see it anyway. If you're going to go about this with some accuracy why don't you buy one of those online detective programms and do a back ground check. Google won't do you much good.

    You've Nexted one another now so it's all good. Onward and upward.

    FWIW.. you can keep yourself out of those standard searches by purchasing an online reputation defender type software that keeps you private from such google type searches.

    You didn't say how you proved he wasn't who he said who he was??? PI friend? Seems that he would be a better source then google before accusing him. NO?

    ... You call me a "nasty cunt" like its a bad thing
    Last edited by Wakeup; 22-10-13 at 09:36 AM.
    “The willingness to accept responsibility for one’s own life is the source from which self-respect springs.” ~Joan Didion

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    Quote Originally Posted by Wakeup View Post
    I think the fact he didn't contact you was because he thought he dodged a bullet. Doing an online search is one thing. Accusing someone of not being who they are just because you couldn't bring them up in google is quite another. Thats how I see it anyway. If you're going to go about this with some accuracy why don't you buy one of those online detective programms and do a back ground check. Google won't do you much good.

    You've Nexted one another now so it's all good. Onward and upward.

    FWIW.. you can keep yourself out of those standard searches by purchasing an online reputation defender type software that keeps you private from such google type searches.

    You didn't say how you proved he wasn't who he said who he was???

    Um...once again, I was right that he completely lied about his identity. I know your comprehension isn't very good, so rather than go off on your useless diatribe, maybe you should have read the posts.

    I will absolutely do this again in the future. If it continues to spare me from getting further involved with liars that are married, I'm all for it.

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    Quote Originally Posted by namemyname View Post
    Um...once again, I was right that he completely lied about his identity. I know your comprehension isn't very good, so rather than go off on your useless diatribe, maybe you should have read the posts.
    I missed it because I was posting but I have added to the post you quoted.
    You didn't say anything about using a PI friend until you were challenged on your choice of google to search him. So you have relating problems, hence my comprehension slip. Why didn't open up with the fact that you found out about him through a PI friend?

    I will absolutely do this again in the future.
    So you should but you're silly to just use google and then accuse someone of not being who they say they are. Buy that Online Detective and find out his marital status etc with accuracy. Its not the fact you checked up on him that is insane its what you relied on that is.

    If it continues to spare me from getting further involved with liars that are married, I'm all for it.
    No one is arguing that beotch
    “The willingness to accept responsibility for one’s own life is the source from which self-respect springs.” ~Joan Didion

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    namemyname

    I think Googling anybody you don't know is almost a requirement in this day & age. If you didn't find anything in the US I'd be concerned too. Maybe as another poster pointed out, the privacy laws are different in other countries & having no information show up is less abnormal. I'm sorry it turned out that you were right & he has another family.

    I will suggest that going forward, you take a different approach when you confront somebody about your findings. Texting is the worst way to solve or even approach a relationship issue. I would have been -- & have been -- softer & more personal about it. I would have talked to him. I also in a light hearted way would have asked to see his driver's license. I always want a cell #, a work # and an address. If the man wouldn't give me those, after a brief period of getting to know him & at a point where I felt safe & comfortable giving them to him, I would assume what you discovered -- he's married.

    Double checking is not insane. Failure to ask questions and verify is insane, imnsho.

  15. #15
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    IMO Using google only and then accusing someone IS insane. Its not the checking that makes me call her insane (although it was done tongue in cheek, hence the lols and winkz) If she's actually calling me a cunt and meaning it, then I take back my winkz and really mean she's insane too. lmao.

    It's still odd that she wouldn't say that she used her PI friend as well as google and only said she used google. Even if she did find out the result after she posted O.o

    BTW: I just googled my hubby and Nada came up about him. There were somethings that came up with his name but none of them were about him. (he doesn't have a very unique first or last name) Thats another reason why you shouldn't rely on google only then accuse prior to using the PI. (as what was relayed in the opening post)

    Besides, google would never have revealed to her that he was married. It's not a good reliable source for checking up on someone and then accusing them before you know whats actually going on.
    Last edited by Wakeup; 22-10-13 at 10:33 AM. Reason: added
    “The willingness to accept responsibility for one’s own life is the source from which self-respect springs.” ~Joan Didion

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