Still Love A Girl From Eight Years Ago

[kamalayka]

In 2005, I was in high school. I had a vivid dream about this one girl in my class (up until that point I had never thought of her or even spoken to her), and when I woke up, I found myself madly in love with her. It was as if a switch had gone off inside my brain.

Every thought was about her. Whenever I saw her, or passed her in the hall, I literally trembled. (To show you how screwed up my thinking was, I couldn't even read a book or watch a movie that was made before she was born, because it seemed that the universe had been created solely to bring her into existence and that the world back then was darker for not knowing her. It sounds CRAZY to say something like that, but that's literally how I felt.)

So for the next couple years, I thought of a way to confront her. I considered her to be out of my league, so to speak, which meant that my biggest barrier was a lack of confidence.

Of course, none of this mattered. . . .

One day, when I was walking down the hall, I saw some jock from the wrestling team flirting with her. She smiled at him, and I died inside.

#

I haven't seen her since I dropped out in 2007. I learned to supress my feelings for her and move on.

But now they're back.

How do I forget about her?????????? I've never had a girlfriend because of these feelings...

(To be honest, the idea of living to be an old man is depressing. I can see myself sitting in a retirement home, alone, staring out a window and wondering why I was so stupid. Suicide seems better than that.)

[bluenote99]

jeez man this may sound harsh but you sound as though you've got a few emotional problems there, getting hung up on an old girlfriend is one thing but wasting 8 years of your life because of a crush that you never followed up is seriously not healthy, the only advice i can offer is to seek therapy as soon as possible to deal with your self-esteem issues and what sounds like depression, hope you come through it ok fella

[DalM0m]

Find somebody more available to shower with your affections. At this point, all this time later, she's a fantasy. You know nothing about her. Once you get involved with somebody she'll fade away, as nothing more than a memory os a greta dream all those years ago.

[FAndrews]

Really sounds like you are hung up on this girl because of a combination of regret and the fact that you have had no other romantic chances in your life. you need to get out there and yes possibly seek some help.

[HeartIsAching]

Well, for one thing you don't really love her, you're infatuated with her. I'd suggest that the best way to 'get rid' of that feeling is to get to know her. Look her up. Bet you find that she's absolutely nothing like the flighty dingy bubblehead you knew in HS.

[hkh8871]

yeah i think you might want to reevaluate your attachment...i have had very vivid dreams of begin in love but they are just dreams...a figment of your imagination...give it some time and it will pass....better yet is to find a real person to spend time with

[Archie]

I'd say, you're regretting that you didn't do anything to begin with and you wish that you had a chance. You had a crush on her, but didn't have enough confidence to talk to her, I won't tell you what you should have done, but remember this - always make use of opportunities. As an example for future, here's one I did once: The girl I was interested in wasn't in class one day, so I sent her info on what we had to do next time in class via FB (even though, obviously, she had girlfriends who could tell her everything). Next time I saw her, she reacted - I created an opportunity, it doesn't matter what it looked like, what matters is - she spoke to me, thanked me and it all went forwards from that point on.

What you should do now is get rid of the regret you have inside you, send her a message via FB or something similar. If possible, meet up with her and see where that leads. Don't make yourself the sufferer and by no means, don't tell her that you're single because of her, you don't want to make her feel guilty or make yourself sound like a creep. Have a laugh about it.
Good luck to you!

[lot]

oh dear yes try and move on you cant dwell so far in the past

[sara12345]

You definitely need to move on. Im sure you will find someone way more attractive and exciting than her.