I am cheating on my wife. I love my new partner.

[Brent29]

I've been in a monogamous relationship with my wife since 2001 (freshman semester of college...I'm 29). We did date on and off during college, I had about 12 partners during the time, she only had 1-2 besides me. After college we lived together for a few years and eventually got married. The entire time we were dating I was 100% faithful. Never had a reason to cheat on her really. Then after we got married my life with her has become so boring I am going crazy. She immediately started acting more and more like her mother (suddenly very conceited, diva, considerably less interested in me and my needs, etc). Sex life is horrible (twice a month at best, vanilla and just boring).

Long story short, fast forward three years to January of this year and I'm at a work meeting out of town. Sitting at a bar with a woman I always liked and flirted from my office. We are both middle management at this company, but don't actually really work together. She is 28 and separated with one child. Lo and behold, she was completely into me and we ended up spending the night together, but because we're both cautious (previously non-cheating) people we limited it to making out. We both agreed it was probably for the best to leave it where we did and be done with it, but when we got back to the home office it did not stop.

Fast forward a few weeks, we met up quite a few more times to make out and we did end up sleeping together about a month later...the sex is incredible. Life changing good. Literally the best sex of my entire life (and I had some crazy sex in college). Every time we see each other we have sex 5-6 times per night (spent another week together out of town on a business meeting and stayed together every night...literally slept 5 hours that week). She is better looking than my wife, our passion is mind blowingly connected the entire time, and we both genuinely like spending time with each other. She sends me sexy pictures, sexts me all the time, and will meet me in the parking lot for a blow job whenever I ask. We also talk about our lives, burn each other CDs and do favors for each other like grab lunch and take turns taking each other out for dinner. It's actually pretty damn romantic.

No matter what our plans are, she made it clear her child comes first, and I am completely okay with that. Both our jobs require a good bit of travel and late nights, so we always have an excuse to be together when we have the chance. No one at work has a clue.

Now I'm only a few months into this thing and don't honestly think I will act on this as of today, but I regularly think about leaving my wife for this woman, and I believe eventually she would divorce her husband for me. I've always said I never wanted children but now I know I just didn't want them with my wife. Now I've met a woman who I think is wonderful mother, and I think I want to have kids with her.

TL;DR: Cheating on wife with a smoking hot girl from work. Best sex of my life. She has one child, wants more, and I think I would like to have kids with her if we go through with this. I think I have fallen in love with her. I'm just sure if I am making the right decision. Whenever I bring up her divorce she shys away from the conversation. I don't want to leave my wife that I possibly can work things out with for this woman if she's not ready. Is her not wanting to talk about the divorce a sign? Advice please.

[searock]

Do you actually believe that if you were to leave your wife and become official and move in with your mistress and her kid, that the sex would continue to be mind-blowingly awesome?

Do you know the difference between lust/infatuation and love? Because it seems that you don't.

[Starnique]

Yeah, go ahead and leave your wife so that you can chase after this chic and watch her go back to her husband, leaving you high and dry. If you don't want to be with your wife and you're unhappy, have you tried talking to her about it or you should have left prior to you screwing another chic. You're being disrespectful towards her. You didn't want kids with her but from another chic .What a stupid and mean thing to say. You barely know this ho besides whats in her panties. I hope wifey finds out and takes all your money.

[BackUpOrGetStng]

Don't get crazy and think about having kids with this chick already. Leave your wife first, and just have some fun. Don't expect her to leave just because you did.

Starnique is right about your money too. You better leave your wife soon, or she is going to find out at some point. Sooner or later she'll wonder why you're so happy even though she's a bitch(according to you). You can leave with a safety net, better do it before wifey finds out or you are gonna be hosed buddy. Make a comment about her being just like her mom as a reason for the divorce.

[searock]

Except that his wife is going to find out that he has been cheating her sooner or later (before or during the divorce) and she is going to get the money no matter what he tells her about being like her mom.

[BackUpOrGetStng]

I think you are stringing together unrelated points. I told him to make the comment about her mom, just to be a dick. That will have no bearing whatsoever on a divorce settlement. You can't be certain she would find out before or during the divorce, and unless she finds dated evidence she won't get anymore than she would have. As I said, if it continues over a period of time, she probably will find out somehow, but the rest of your assertions are wishful ramblings at this point.

[Brent29]

I'm not a selfish, coldhearted man. My wife listens to everything her mom tells her regarding our marriage and because of this, the apple hasn't fallen far from the tree. If she and I have an disagreement, her mom will call me or get in my face telling me how I'm the problem. Her mom has equal say so in our marriage. My wife has a bad spending problem and all she does is spend money she doesn't have. There's no reason we should be in a financial bond right now. I loved her dearly when we met and married and she is outwardly attractive but on the inside, she's ugly. I'm looking into a divorce. We are not connected anymore and it does slightly hurt. This new woman has filled the emptiness.

Speaking of which, do you all think she is serious about moving forward with me?

[namemyname]

Here's the reality of affairs, and I know from whence I speak...

Having an affair is ONLY the best parts of a relationship. It's like the first few weeks of dating someone new ALL THE TIME. It's the hot sex, the sweet words, the fantasy of a future...everyone is on their best behavior EVERY time you're together, as your time is so limited.

But, it's so NOT reality. You haven't seen each other when sick, or when some serious crisis happens...you don't fight about the mortgage, or the dishes in the sink, or dinner with the in-laws.

Of COURSE it seems magical. Fantasy is exactly that.

You should divorce your wife because your marriage is over. But, I can also tell you that things will go no where with the OW, but, you'll need to find that out on your own. Even if she does leave her H for you, you will find out she's a far different person on a daily basis, and probably not too different from your wife/marriage. Moreso, it will start to niggle at you that she's a cheater, and not to be trusted, so every time she's out without you, you'll wonder if she's meeting some other dude, as you'll know how easy it was for her to cheat with you.

[DalM0m]

If this woman didn't exist, would you leave your wife to be alone? If yes, start divorce proceedings immediately.

If you would only leave your wife FOR this other woman, you are destined to be alone. Your wife is going to find out & she's going to leave you & this other woman will not commit to you.

If you genuinely love your wife but this is some sort a fluke. Forget the other woman & take all that passion & direct it toward your wife. Get some counseling & learn how to fight for your marriage.

[surfhb2]

Dude! I understand your problem....believe me. Take a year off and date lots of girls.

Youre 29..... you can date 20 - 40 year olds. Get a divorce and have fun and let the dust settle a bit Jeesh!!

[searock]

I told him to make the comment about her mom, just to be a dick. That will have no bearing whatsoever on a divorce settlement.

Fair enough.

You can't be certain she would find out before or during the divorce, and unless she finds dated evidence she won't get anymore than she would have. As I said, if it continues over a period of time, she probably will find out somehow, but the rest of your assertions are wishful ramblings at this point.

I'm pretty sure she knows or at least suspects already.

[Wakeup]

I'm not a selfish, coldhearted man. My wife listens to everything her mom tells her regarding our marriage and because of this, the apple hasn't fallen far from the tree. If she and I have an disagreement, her mom will call me or get in my face telling me how I'm the problem. Her mom has equal say so in our marriage. My wife has a bad spending problem and all she does is spend money she doesn't have. There's no reason we should be in a financial bond right now. I loved her dearly when we met and married and she is outwardly attractive but on the inside, she's ugly. I'm looking into a divorce. We are not connected anymore and it does slightly hurt. This new woman has filled the emptiness.

Speaking of which, do you all think she is serious about moving forward with me?

*Looks in crystal ball* You're a nice human dildo. She'd never marry you, you're a cheating asshole. You'll do until the husband she left gets his shit together and then she'll be going back to him (IF she's even separated) You don't even know her except for her snatch and what shes lied to you err told you..

[searock]

I loved her dearly when we met and married and she is outwardly attractive but on the inside, she's ugly.

Again: do you know the difference between infatuation/lust and love?

[RipVanWinkleX]

Your a jerk TC. Cheating pisses me off. If you had ANY love for your wife you would have told her and divorced before you ****ed someone else.

EDIT: You know what? Go die in a fire you ****ing asshole. You HAVE A WIFE. And if she didn't love you then you should of divorced her. But seeing how you are married there is no reason for ****ing someone else. You are lucky and you just screw her over just because you want to **** some bitch. People like you make me hate life. If you do not right what you did wrong then there is no hope for you. Tell your wife what you did and apologized. If you had any respect for her you will tell her the truth and beg. If you really don't want her, then there should be no issue for you to tell her the truth and be with your new **** buddy.

[TablesandChairs]

Divorce your wife, seek to have a proper relationship with the new woman. If it doesn't work out, too bad. You can move on to someone else. Clearly, your wife doesn't make you happy. Clearly, she would be better off without you. So, why not do the right thing? Do you not have the balls to risk being single for a while?