Step mom

[blutifuldoll]

My mam died in 2009 and It was one of the worst days of my life, Anyway this past Saturday my dad got married, big church wedding, his wife is nice, we've talked a few times tho I keep it plain and simple. They got back from their honey moon and I just can't go home, I don't want to, I just don't know how to react with someone else taking my mam's place, Yesterday I went upto the gate but didn't get in I just went back to my best friend's place. I'm soo used to us just being alone, I don't want a mother figure, Am I being selfish weird or just silly? I really don't know how to deal with this.

[michelle23]

She doesnt have to be a stepmom hun-she can just be a friend to you. I know it must be really hard for you but maybe give her a chance. You said she seems nice. Nobody will ever replace your mum but im sure shed want you and your dad to be happy

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[Rowen]

Obviously, no one is ever going to replace your mother. The two of you, in the years you spent together, shared a maternal bond that no one can ever break. But you need to remember that the woman who married your father is not trying to break that. She's not trying to be your mother; she's just trying to connect with you a little because both of you are a part of your father's life. Like Michelle said, you may become friends with her. She doesn't have to be your "new Mom."

[Dr-Love]

dont think of her as your mother's replacement because shes not. no one can ever replace a mother. but as you said she seems nice so why not give her a chance? you may realise that you really like her as a "step-mom" and as a friend. my advice get to know her a little better day by day and eventually you'll find yourself being more comfortable in your own home

[DalM0m]

If your mother loved your father she would want him to be happy. This new person fills a huge void in his life.

After my mom died, my dad had a woman he was "keeping company with'. They were very sweet together. I was so happy he had a bright spot in his life.

When my EX BF's mother died, about 2 years later his father started dating a women. My EX & his brother went nuts. They were angry & nasty. They really didn't like the idea. I sat them both down & told them they were being brats. Here was somebody who their father could talk to & spend time with. He didn't drive & this woman took him to the doctors so they didn't have to. I tried to help them realize that him dating her did not invalidate anything he felt for their mom. It was just a sign of him still having the will to live.

If your dad & his new wife moved into your childhood home you can take baby steps about going there but try to find it in your heart to be kind to the new wife. Your dad will live longer if he's happy.

[BackUpOrGetStng]

I still have my mom, but my step-mom has been a great addition to my life. It started off as mutual respect between us, and now we get along very well. It sounds like there's already respect between you, so just give it some time.

[NoGoodAtLove]

Mutual respect is huge. I had step dad for a few years who was a total bitch and was rude as ****. I remember being bigger than him when I was like 16 and wanting to pop him when he'd yell at my mom and little sister over petty shit.

Don't think of her as replacing your mom's place as YOUR mom. I doubt your dad is trying to replace your mom as an individual. Your dad just wants to be happy and enjoy companionship with someone he is compatible with.

[hatesthis]

I'm sure your dad misses your presence and it is still your home and I am sure your step mom misses you there too, did you still live at home, or long moved out? Maybe call and feel it out and make plans to go over for dinner. Once you make the first visit over after their wedding you will feel a lot better about visiting after.