She makes me say "I love you" to her first after every phone conversation

[A1234]

Me and my girlfriend have been dating for over a year now and I love her very much. One thing I don't really get is why she thinks that I have to say the I love you part first after every phone conversation. She will never say it to me first. I've noticed that a lot of my friends girlfriends will say the I love you part then the guy but she makes me do it first otherwise I hear it from her the next day. I just don't get it!?

[A1234]

I don't have an issue with saying it to her first most of the time but every once in a while I will get upset at her and I would like for her to say it to me before I do it.

[oxytocinbite]

I did the same thing for a long time, it was just because I felt kind of shy saying it first and it was easier to say after. It's not a big deal, stop assuming it's something bad just because all the other girls say I love you first.

Or the way you should go would be just ask her, have you heard that communication is the best thing for a relationship? Use it.

[3mK]

Maybe she just likes a little reassurance
I'm sure she doesn't question anything in your relationship, but she probably enjoys hearing you say that to her. Brightens her day kinda thing, ya know?

[TheEvilJester]

I definitely agree with oxy and 3mK, but at the same time, but don't you think HE might like having someone say "I love you" to him as well? If they have been together for over a year, I don't see why she should still always expect him to say it first. By then, you should have some level of comfort and confidence in your relationship and not feel the need to hear your partner say it first in order to validate it in your mind. You should be able to ust say it naturally.

That said, though, I definitely think too many people settle into relationships and then take things like saying "I love you" for granted. To me, in a committed and happy relationship, that is something you should say at least once, if not multiple times a day. Although, don't overdue it either. That can actually be annoying. LOL!

I will say, though, that I agree with the thought that it probably isn't something to worry about too much. I mean, I can't say that for 100% sure, but it is probably just some kind of insecurity type of thing. Hopefully she will get over that soon. If it bothers you, you could always talk to her about it, but just be sure you do so very politely and matter of fact. You don't want to turn it into an argument, or make it seem like an attack.

[surfhb2]

This is bad behavior on her part. Don't give in to her BS. Say it when you want to.....she'll learn and get over it

Probably some dumb "shit test" or whatever it's called just to see your reaction as a pansy man or a guy who is comfortable in your own skin

[Wakeup]

I don't have an issue with saying it to her first most of the time but every once in a while I will get upset at her and I would like for her to say it to me before I do it.

Have you had the ballzzz to tell her that?

[surfhb2]

Have you had the ballzzz to tell her that?

I always love The Wakeup's advice !

Just tell her what you want from her

[iloveyoukaola]

very simple, just tell her what you want,

[michelle23]

I dont think saying i love you all the time is a good thing. It loses its meaning and just becomes a habit. You should say it when you really mean it-like an emotional moment between you or after an argument, after sex etc..

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[TheEvilJester]

I dont think saying i love you all the time is a good thing. It loses its meaning and just becomes a habit. You should say it when you really mean it-like an emotional moment between you or after an argument, after sex etc..

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I can definitely kind of agree with you to some degree. But, at the same time, I still think in a good relationship it should be said on a regular basis. I do think there is a such thing as saying it TOO MUCH, which I would agree causes it to lose meaning. However, I think in a good relationship it should still be said regularly. To me, that doesn't take away its specialness. You can say it as just sort of an everyday kind of thing, and then you can easily put more serious meaning into it in an appropriate moment. But, that is just my opinion, as I'm sure others may disagree.