To listen, or not listen to sad, romantic songs?

[Azwraith]

Hello guys, I have a doubdt that I think many others also have.
I love to listen to good music, and songs aways bring back different kinds of emotions, be it a Hard Rock, Trance or Jazz.
I had a relationship where things didn't go well, and now we are very far apart (in different cities).
And you aways have the romantic, sad songs that makes you remember of your special someone. The type of songs can vary much, but I guess you can start with bands such as Coldplay, SnowPatrol, Creed, Nickelback, and so on.
When I am caught thinking of her, I feel the urge to listen to these songs, lock myself on my room and think about her for a lot, remembering her and daydreamming. Is this really a good thing to be done?
I also heard once that in many cases of suicide, the person had a drink and listened to sad songs before he killed himself. I don't know how exact this is (or true, to say the least).
And I also know that the best way to forget someone and get over it is to shut all kinds of connection with that person. But we can't just stop our thoughts and memmories from rushing back into our heads, that is the problem.
What do you guys think of this matter?
Should we, or should we not listen to sad songs in relationships? Specially if things don't go well, or after a break up?

[smiling100]

Personally I can't do it as it just brings back memories & it's to painful.

It's just like looking at photos of the good times when you were both happy or reading old text messages.

[hatesthis]

It comforts you and occupies you, listening to that. If it makes you feel better, why not, if it makes you feel as bad or worse stop listening to it, go out feel the sun on your face and grab some lunch with good friends.

[iloveyoukaola]

I think we should, because it helps us to know the sad and we will fight for happiness

[Azwraith]

Well, there is also the issue that almost anything you do, makes you remember of her/him. Watching a movie she used to like, listening to a song, eating her favorite food or going to a place you guys used to stay all the time. These things destroy me

[dem862]

Breakup songs helped me recover from my divorce. They helped me realize I was not the only one in the world who has loved and lost. It helped me come to terms with life post relationship. It helped some of the emotions to come out and have a good cry about it, and then get on my with day and my life. Depression is one of the 5 stages of grief, so don't fight it. However, I would caution against drinking or any kind of addictive, self-destructive behavior. Those will not help anything, and will likely only make things worse. Good luck to you.

[NoGoodAtLove]

Ahhh, this is why I love guitar and more specifically blues guitar. This is also why I enjoy being sad from time to time.

I usually pick a theme and listen to a bunch of various artists/songs on the topic and try to work myself through something:
1.) Feeling blue: Derek and the Dominos - Have You Ever Loved a Woman, Marvin Gaye - Heard it through the grapevine, Johnny Cash - Trouble in Mind
2.) Picking yourself up: John Mayer -I'm Gonna find another you, John Mayall Clapton - Someday After a while, Jimi Hendrix - Get out my life woman. John Mayer - You're no one till someone lets you down
3.) Independent again: Anything really rockin' and not having to do with being sad over a woman or overcoming sadness. Like, Stevie Ray Vaughan - Rude Mood, or something that gets ya pumped.

Remember we all go through these emotions. Channel them, appreciate being alive to get to experience them, and when you feel good again you'll feel better than ever before having gone through the low. Then when you hit the town you'll be ready to get after it.

[overanxious]

i used to love romantic/heartbreak songs....they were some of my favorite songs...so much emotion and passion even though they seemed cliche....temptations, stylistics,...anything...even that one damn rascall flatts song "what hurts the most".....this was of course before i had ever had the feeling of being let down, dumped, broken up....i never really fully understood them...so i loved them....now when i hear them...i just cant deal

[Azwraith]

Breakup songs helped me recover from my divorce. They helped me realize I was not the only one in the world who has loved and lost. It helped me come to terms with life post relationship. It helped some of the emotions to come out and have a good cry about it, and then get on my with day and my life. Depression is one of the 5 stages of grief, so don't fight it. However, I would caution against drinking or any kind of addictive, self-destructive behavior. Those will not help anything, and will likely only make things worse. Good luck to you.

I also think that way. It might help us to express our emotions, and to cry out when we need. Also, listening to others that went through the same thing may be reassuring. But I would still like to hear more opinions, as this topic seems to be untouched. Thanks everyone for the answers so far

[NoGoodAtLove]

I also think that way. It might help us to express our emotions, and to cry out when we need. Also, listening to others that went through the same thing may be reassuring. But I would still like to hear more opinions, as this topic seems to be untouched. Thanks everyone for the answers so far

Exactly.

For my most recent situation, "didn't mean to treat her so bad, she was the best girl I ever had had" (San Francisco Bay Blues, a song Clapton covers) made me feel a lot better about mistreating a girl. Not that what I had done was OK, but that I'm not the only guy to mistreat a girl he loves. There's a song for everything. Everyone has felt what we've felt, and music is not only assurance of that but an opportunity to outlet (sing, guitar, whatever).

[Azwraith]

Well, there is this problem that I was researching on some other websites and forums, and they say that you have to permanently disconnect and cut all kinds of things that remember you of him/her (your ex, lover, etc). So, if it is a place, don't go there. If it is a movie, don't watch it. If it is a song, don't listen to it. What do you guys think of this? (Specially, as in the topic, if it is a sad song, since most couples usually have at least one music "for them").

[ameliapearl]

Music is a big part of my life and I find that it's comforting and great when I'm happy or sad or whatever, but if I'm absolutely wrecked, it just makes me wallow too much. Which is hard to control and say no to, since if I'm in that state, I don't HAVE much control... But I'd vote for doing something that separates you from feeling TOO much if the emotions are already hurting an unbearable amount. I've been reading a lot or watching thriller-type TV shows...