Natural selection could explain life-long virginity

[uri]

I think that natural selection fully explains why some men cannot get laid or cannot get any affection from the opposite sex.

While technically speaking I'm not a virgin (I had sex with many a hookers) I could be considered a virgin in the sense that I have never had sex with anyone who would have loved me or would have felt attraction towards me.

So I think I belong to the minority group I am talking about.

I don't personally know anyone who's in a similar situation like me so there must not be many people like me (percentage-wise) but our numbers can be high numerically speaking.

Reasons can be different. If it's a personal decision then it's probably fine to refrain from forming relationships.

But in my case, it's not a choice. Some people are meant to be losers. It's natural selection.

[Ugly_Swan]

Or maybe you need to work on your personality and inner strength. Ie become a man so that you can be attractive.

A girl is doomed if she is ugly. But you are a guy. You can compensate 100x with so many different aspects of personality and even physically (by working out).

Dunno how old you are or how you look, but it might not b as hopeless as you think. It might be an attitude thing.

But yes, otherwise natural selection is always at play--but ppl can trick evolution nowadays by treating diseases and learning to be someone they're not.

[Rowen]

This sounds like another LR.... O.o

I think it's your self-worth and your confidence which is the problem. Perhaps you should try seeing a specialist because it sounds like there are some deep rooted issues.... But in the meantime, please do not use anymore hookers. You might seriously get an STD.

[violet11]

The composer Satie only had one lover in his lifetime... the relationship lasted six months. He arguably created one of the most beautiful pieces of music of all time.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S-Xm7s9eGxU

So I dont think genes have anything to do with it...

It's the vibe you give out. People are repelled by one thing: fear. It may manifest as desperation or coldness, but if you are afraid, people will run.

[smackie9]

Well I know some who are destined to never have a real relationship because they have some sort of mental issues such as anxiety disorders, aspergers syndrome, psychological issues started from childhood, like being sexually abused, abused or traumatized, raised in a strict religious household, being very unattractive, bullied. They take on a creepy like personality because they don't know how to act around people, so they end up being recluse. The more you push yourself out of society socially, the worse the problem gets.

The individuals that I know who suffer this type of life, I have suggested some kind of therapy as a last resort. I had to cut myself off from them because they were becoming disturbingly dependent on me to a point that it started to interfered with my life.

[surfhb2]

This is great news for human kind!! Thanks!

I think you need to stop crying and start living good luck

[someguyintexas]

The ones saying it's all about self confidence, personality, feeling of self worth I believe are correct. Male or Female... A good friend of mine, she is not the most attractive, has a way of holding herself and looking at a guy that makes them want her... Don't understand it myself but it's obvious it has everything to do with whats inside showing on the outside. Trust me dude, that old saying "Nobody can love you if you don't love yourself" is soooo true!

[AnErin]

Don't be sleeping with hookers, you have no clue some of the things they do with clients. Some men have VERY nasty fetishes.
About not finding someone - What you have to do is get out there and TRY. Learn what you can about dating, interaction etc. Also, play up your good qualities. think of what you can offer and go with that. Say you have a sense of humor - PLAY IT! Say you are romantic - PLAY IT!

Also remember that most humans share the same insecurities.

Listen - I was in the same spot for about four years. I have two serious obstacles that should work dead against me. I decided not to let them get in the way. After that, dating has not been a problem. Yes I have to do a little work but it is easy for me now. I used to think, "No one would want me" but after a while I thought, "Who am I to deny people the chance to date me if they are interested?"

When you get out there and TRY instead of paying some nasty hoebag for it - with each rejection, bad date, getting dumped etc, LEARN from it! Get the ball rolling and you will be a pimp daddy.

Me, well let us say I am now working on a more solid relationship with a certain lady. There will be struggles but we are building on it.

[3mK]

Its your own opinion of yourself that has made you this so called "natural selection life long virgin"

Girls can pick up on that stuff and they don't want to sleep with a "weak" man.

[uri]

Its your own opinion of yourself that has made you this so called "natural selection life long virgin"

Girls can pick up on that stuff and they don't want to sleep with a "weak" man.

This is not true. I am just ugly, fat and poor. This is why the beautiful girls don't want anything to do with me because they don't want to date a poor, fat and ugly guy like me.

I think that if any other guy were in my condition (also fat, ugly and poor) then he would also find it very difficult (if not outright impossible) to land a beautiful girlfriend.

[pcmaster]

Imagine that you are rich, fit and beautiful. What would be diferent in your life? What you will do that you are not doing now? Imagine this and it will be easy to realise that you can do a lot right now already. Just concentrating on what you dont have makes you blind about present things. Its not necessary to make poor choices. Ugly? Take care of yourself ! Poor - find a job ! Fat - eat right, move your body !

Life is the same to everyone, its all about the choices we make. Everyone could be like you when doing what you do. Love dont exist when you live like this.
There must be a dream. Faith in future.

[smackie9]

I've seen plenty of fat ugly poor guys with good looking women that leaves me scratching my head......it's all about attitude bro.

[Kromat83]

Males go more for the exterior ... looks, active, fashion, personality towards others
Females are more for interior... Emotions, confidence, self-worth, career,

I've been the fat , ugly individual, and was able to hook up with an athlete because my mindset was starting to become different when I finally wanted to make the changes by eating healthier, exercising , drinking mostly water and my attitude and outlook on look changed dramatically and women can see that.

I also like to venture into various activities, so I know they wont be bored, but there could be some that they enjoy, that I wouldn't mind trying.

Believe in yourself, that people out there can love you for the person that you are.

Losing your virginity can come naturally, but if that is all that you are chasing, then just find a local slut.
If you want it to be with the right person, then take your time and find someone that you can appreciate, and
likes being around you, then let it happen when the time is right.

[smackie9]

Ya LR was able to find someone to oblige him, so it can happen......so where is LR lately?

[AnErin]

Fat, poor, and ugly?
Here is what to do to better your chances -
Pretend to be confident, fake it til you make it. The worst someone can do is say "no".

Make no mention of your financial situation. If out on a date pay for it like it isn't a big deal. Do not sit there and dig thru your wallet and complain about the cost or "this is my last $20"

Dress and groom best you can. Need nicer clothes but are broke? Hit the thrift shops.

Most important - you have got to get out there and try. Seems to me you are just not wanting to get out there and go to work.