Always single

[Loloy123]

Ok so I'm a good looking, nice, fun, good job and family female yet I'm always single. The most recent thing to get me down is I met a guy that works in my company on a night out and talked to him for ages, had a great time. We ended up not saying goodbye that night as we were chatting to others. So the next day I looked him up on Facebook to say hi, no big deal and he doesn't say much at all !

Why am I always single??? I'm not being big headed but I do get stares for my looks. I don't actively seek a boyfriend, I just happened to enjoy this guys company and I thought he did mine too but obviously not with his cold Facebook messages. Any advice guys what I'm doing wrong? Am I making some big mistake or something?

[Luis64]

First of, how do you feel about commitment? Second question is, are you giving chances to the right candidates? Some guys only want a good time with a girl rather than a serious commitment.

It has a lot to do with the type of guys you are attracted to.

[RipVanWinkleX]

You are who you are. If you think you are a mistake then you will be. Give your self a better self image.

The guy might not be in to you. But if you really need to know you need to ask him.

Also, you sound down for being "always' single but you don't actively seek a boyfriend. Relationship is a numbers game. If you really want one, seek one.

[Loloy123]

I think I might act aloof sometimes and during my daily routine I usually walk quickly and not make eye contact.. Think I should work on that

Maybe he wasn't interested in me but he did get me a drink and chatted for ages - I duno! If he was interested he would have been nicer in his messages to me - but then work colleagues said he's such a nice guy. Not to me on Facebook he's not!

You mean I need to actively seek a boyfriend? I don't like the sound if that - does it seem desperate?

[RipVanWinkleX]

Seeking someone to be with is desperate? Do you want the perfect boyfriend to just fall from the sky?

[Luis64]

I think I might act aloof sometimes and during my daily routine I usually walk quickly and not make eye contact.. Think I should work on that

Maybe he wasn't interested in me but he did get me a drink and chatted for ages - I duno! If he was interested he would have been nicer in his messages to me - but then work colleagues said he's such a nice guy. Not to me on Facebook he's not!

You mean I need to actively seek a boyfriend? I don't like the sound if that - does it seem desperate?

Seeking someone to be with is desperate? Do you want the perfect boyfriend to just fall from the sky?

lol, If you want something you have to get up and get it. Just pursue what you really want and when you go on dates at the right moment state what you're really looking for.

[basilandthyme]

If someone buys you a drink and chats with you, they may simply be being social that night. It doesn't mean that they want to have a close friendship or relationship with you. The fact that he didn't ask for your number should have been enough of a clue that he wasn't interested.

And I agree that you have to make an effort if you're to find a boyfriend. Do you give all guys a chance - or are you fussy? Do you smile at guys if they make eye contact with you?

[Loloy123]

Yeah I guess he would have asked for my number if he was interested - oh well. Although we did get split up during the night and around 3am I just went home - I'd forgot about him until the next day! But by the cold Facebook messages shows he's not interested anyway. No I never smile at guys when they look T me - I always look away real quick. Guess I should smile eh!

[basilandthyme]

Yeah I guess he would have asked for my number if he was interested - oh well. No I never smile at guys when they look T me - I always look away real quick. Guess I should smile eh!

Giving a confident smile to a guy who looks at you is the first rule of attracting him. Looking away quickly will only give them the message that you're closed to any approach.

Now, be aware that smiling won't get all guys to make an approach, but it's nice to learn to have a friendly and open demeanour regardless.

[basilandthyme]

I wish everyone's "always single" issues were as easy to identify as yours. You have the power, now go and use it.

[Loloy123]

Il try - it's kinda hard though ( smiling should be easy ) Thanks

[TurnBackTime]

As others said, your self-image goes a long way in securing a man.

Just be confident in who you are, be flirty when you engage a man that you are attracted to. Instead of stalking their facebook page the following day, cease the moment! If you were enjoying his company you should have asked for his number right then and there. Tell him you wouldn't mind going for a coffee or a drink another time.

If you are an attractive, confident woman, you will find a man in no time flat.

[HDBadger]

Getting looks from guys means nothing. It just means they might be willing to put up with you long enough to screw you. I wouldn't be proud of getting looks.

If you want a boyfriend, go up to a guy, strike up a conversation, and ask for his number.

It's not the job of men to chase you. You want a boyfriend? Go after one.

[Loloy123]

Well where I'm from ( Ireland ) it's still kinda up to the guy to ask the girl out, they tend to freak out if a female does the chasing. That's why the Facebook guy was cold to me probably -freaked out I contacted him ! Think I should move country and leave the backward guys here.

[Starnique]

I don't believe in pursuing a guy. I believe in making it known that you're open to getting to know him but after that, he should do the pursuing. If a guy lets the girl do all the chasing, it really says a lot about his character. Lazy, lacks confidence or he may just not be into you. So regardless the reason, don't buy into it because it's not good.. They may stick around with you because you pursued them but when the right girl their looking for comes around, I'll bet he'll pursue her because men usually go after what and who they really want. If you solely pursue him, you'll probably end up initiating almost everything in the relationship. Also if shit doesn't work out and you call him out on it, he'll say, well you wanted to be with me. I didn't go after you.

I know you wouldn't want that. If a guy put in work to get you, he'll more likely cherish you because it was you he wanted.

My point is make yourself available, but a man should do the pursuing. In almost any situation that I see a chic sweating a guy and chasing him, she always ends up with a broken heart or being disrespected.