Some advice please

[Fyodor]

Please someone tell me do I have a legitimate gripe or am I just weird?

I have only had one serious relationship, which turned into a marriage and now is over. I'm 36 now and every girl I meet seems to already be involved to some extent with another guy. Or put another way, I haven't met a girl who isn't already sleeping with some one else.

My question is: how can I be okay getting to know a girl...spending time and all ... When she already has a guy she sees (sleeps with)? I've learned this is apparently normal... In your 30's it's rare to meet someone who isn't already involved with someone, at least on some level. But I really don't know how to open up and get to know someone on Tuesday who is having sex with someone else on Thursday. Am I odd for finding this difficult?

[anastasis]

I've just turned 37 in September and I have absolutely no advice at all on dating in your late 30s. It's a total waiste land out there. In fact, it's so bad and so hopeless, I really do want to be castrated. Wish I could help you. Best of luck, my friend.

P.S. Online dating isn't going to help you at all, either. I suggest moving to another country. You would think that women would get smarter with age, but they don't. The dumb ones just keep getting dumber, and the smart ones are all already taken forever. That's reality. I don't care what anyone tells you. I'm here to tell you that's reality.

[Fyodor]

Well my only issue with you,my friend, is that I can't see why another country would be any different! And while I haven't invested much time in online dating, I've been to enough sites that I now consider them to be cyber-bars, no different in character than regular bar scenes. Still though, there's no answer to my question: are most guys ok with getting to know a girl who is probably already intimate with someone else, or am I just too sensitive?

[anastasis]

Well my only issue with you,my friend, is that I can't see why another country would be any different! And while I haven't invested much time in online dating, I've been to enough sites that I now consider them to be cyber-bars, no different in character than regular bar scenes. Still though, there's no answer to my question: are most guys ok with getting to know a girl who is probably already intimate with someone else, or am I just too sensitive?

Yeah, you're right. Other countries are going to be the same or worse. I was just trying to give you a little hope, even though I already know better.

I really do wish I had something better to tell you. I just don't.

When I get up to the pearly gates some day and they ask me why I never settled down with anyone, I will honestly be able to say that I found absolutely nothing but a barron waiste land of one mirage after the other. So I have no regrets. Women simply are not worth the effort today. And if it gets much worse, humanity will not be worth maintaining on earth. I cannot even begin to describe how completely ****ed up my generation is, along with the ones right after mine. Why do you think men play video games all the time now? Yeah, they've quit. Done. Finished. It's OVER!

Women can try to manipulate and control men to a certain point in their social witchcraft, but there comes a point where men are going to collectively just all say one day, **** it, and walk off forever. I think society is almost to that point. Women still believe their game is going on, and they don't realize that only the scum of the earth are still playing it. They absolutely do not have a clue. Not a damned clue.

[Fyodor]

Ok then, well how about the other guys you know...just to answer my question...do they seem to care all that much that girls they have met or are talking to presently see other guys? See, I honestly don't know if I am just too naive and sensitive about these things(which would be a flaw- something to be overcome), or whether I'm just not shallow(which I would be proud of).

[Fyodor]

You're quite pessimistic. Maybe you have reason to be. But I have question and instead of answering or contributing you're ranting. Can you try to be more constructive?

[anastasis]

Ok then, well how about the other guys you know...just to answer my question...do they seem to care all that much that girls they have met or are talking to presently see other guys? See, I honestly don't know if I am just too naive and sensitive about these things(which would be a flaw- something to be overcome), or whether I'm just not shallow(which I would be proud of).

I only know one dude who successfully got into a long term marriage in his late 30s. Out of all the people I've known, I actually witnessed a grand total of one. His wife had run off and left him for the plumber (lliterally, as cliche as that may sound). He married this lady who was his same age (37). They remain happy now 5 years later. She can't have children, but they are content. But this case is extremely rare. I mean like one in a million rare. At 30 years old a woman is usually celebrating wedding aniversaries and raising her children. Most single mothers are COMPLETELY off limits, as they are nuts (true psychopaths). As for the rest of these female forms in their 30s, you have reems of fat, ugly, or utterly slutty pages to flip through. When I say it's a total waisteland out there, I'm not just blowing smoke, bro. I mean it's friggin death valley. And there is no changing it.

Best thing to do? Think local. And begin lowering your standards of beauty. As for myself, I can't bring myself to do that. I want beauty, brains, morality, wit, charm, sexuality and enchantment. I want the whole package and always have. And that's why I'll never have anyone. Don't be like me. You'll never find anyone. In order to find someone at this time, you're going to need to get down with stupid, and get down with obese, because that's all that's left. Or you can settle for one slutty milf cum bag after the next who never cared about anything but a **** in their 20s in remain in that state to this day. It's your choice. Tha't's as constructive as I can be while remaining as honest as I can be. And I wish I didn't have to.

[Fyodor]

Well that has been my gut feeling, but I don't like it and it feels so negative. Everything you are saying I have thought to myself... Particularly the part about the good ones already being taken by this point, and all we're left with are the undesirables. But I am not an undesirable guy, I was just in a relationship that didn't last. It happens. And there must be girls out there in similar situations. Sure they are harder to find at this age, but they are there.

My point is that when I do find one, the odds of her being completely uninvolved are minuscule. I don't hold it against a girl that she is living her own life when I happen to meet her. My issue is that I can't bring myself to move forward with girl who is intimate with someone else. I don't look down on them for this. How could I expect her to sit around alone having no fun or enjoyment till I come around??? And how can I expect her to cease whatever she has going on simply because I ask for her number or ask her out for coffee? My thoughts imply nothing critical of women. I just seem to have difficulty with the reality of the situation.

[anastasis]

Yep. It's going to be quite a shock to your system. Some of us have had several years to slowly adjust to the reality and see it clearly. You're still new to all of this and certain realities have not yet occured to you.

And you know the best thing you can do? Keep rocking on. Be true to yourself. I have no regrets, because I know the truth of God and have hope for the future in riding the Chariot of Fire to the gates of tomorrow. It's the world's loss, not mine.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PvF9PAxe5Ng

[dem862]

It's a woman's market right now. The shift has something to do with the feminist agenda.

[seecrithiding]

Don't give up! There are women out there who aren't complete sluts and won't be sleeping with every Dick and Harry (excuse the pun!) haha.
Things aren't as dark as you'd like to believe them to be. In the meantime, worry about you and improving yourself and healing from your relationship.