i need help :(

[calebos10]

Hey im a 19 y/o male who just got dumped by his year 1/2 gf. Well this was a wild and intense relationship. We had our ups and downs but at the end of the day we loved each other. We dated kinda by accident. I was her best male friend for like 4 months before we started dating. I helped her get over a guy but then we started hanging out more and then we started dating. The 1st 6 months were complete bliss. Then I had to move back to my moms house because my dad was becoming a very bad influence. But the only problem was that she lived 2 blocks away from my moms....so then we got even more serious and we started seeing each other everyday. We broke up once then the next night she goes and has sex with a guy at a party. Then the next day we met up to talk about stuff.sShetold me about the party and started crying and saying she wants me. She blames that she had anxiety and depression cuz it runs in the family. I didnt care and i took her back. 2 months later we did it again. I got her to come back this time. Then 5 months ago she had to get the morning after pill. Then she got the birth control shot 2 months later and then we had unprotected sex like a week later. With research the same day I found out that it wouldnt start working until a month after she got it. So another trip to get plan b. Then I just sorta lost it. There was alot of stress from my parents, job, school and her. I started having doubts about us and I let it affect us. I started to talk to other girls just to make me feel loved because she wsa going through mood swings. She never found out though but I was questioning if I really loved her. I never cheated on her I couldve but didn't. We still saw each other every other day but I just sorta lost a little passion for her because all of her stress and mine. So last week she came into my room after school looked at me and said I love very much. I said it back and we just sat there in silence. Then she said she couldnt do this anymore. She couldnt be my girlfriend anymore. So we talked it out and decided to be friends. The same night I gave her one shirt back and we hugged. Then she said she wants to be left alone and she has to find ways not to think about me. She said how it was really easy to fall in love with you and if you would get your oldself back and wanna try I bet it wouldnt be hard to get them back. Then 3 days later I find out from facebook that she started seeing someone. Now in between those days we were texting sporadically. I had the plan of no contact but she kept saying how she doesnt wanna lose me and she still wants to know my piece of mind all the time. So I asked her about the relationship she is currently in and she says I wasnt looking it just happened. But she says she didnt tell me cuz she his first girlfriend and hes still a virgin. Now i have never ever caught her in a lie but I think is this to good to be true? I mean stereotypically hes the type of kid thats a huge nerd in school and expect to be a virgin and not by choice. Dont mean to offend anyone!!!!! So it really screwed with me because this kid is completely different than me. My ex and I are quite different

[calebos10]

different though. She is a great singer and musician. I say she is real classy and intelligent girl. Me? I play soccer. Now dont get me wrong we shared alot of interests together. Also we found out our future that we want for ourselves are completely alike. We are both adventurers and are content with a small dinky appartment while traveling the world. But having with someone hurt but being with a virgin hurt even more. Cuz my ex wasnt mine or was I her first. We both had 3 sexual partners counting each other. So I think shes dating this guy cuz she thinks hes not looking for sex but a long term relationship.Now her current boyfriend is in another schools choir and knows the ins and outs about theater and music. SO they share alot of common interests. So it feels like they could take off because my ex will be his first for everything and she will like that and knows she wont have any cmpetition. So I friend requested her new bf on FB outta complete irrational thinking. Then I texted her friend why she broke up with me and went to this new guy. She showed her and my ex forwarded a message saying shes sick of me. She hates sneaky people and wants me outta her life. I told her I didnt mean to make her hurt me. She texted me that night said yea I know you didnt. I started a new job so she said she would like to talk about my new job the next day. So I did no contact for a day and caved and facebooked her. I notified her about me doing no contact. I told her that I will always wanna be friends with her but I need time to get back to me. She said thats fine and I can text her anytime I want. We dont have to talk about us we can just talk about current events and deep stuff. I told her that I will prolly not talk to her in awhile cuz i need time to myhself to be able to get in dating shape again and move on. I said I just cant move on as fast as you can. She hasnt replied yet. But do you think I ruined my chances on getting her back? Do you think this guy is a rebound because she started dating after 3 days of the break up but I know they share alot of common iterests. I need help. Sorry I rambled on but I love this girl. Ive been told by my friends that I could do better and that I should move on. But I just can Im severely in love with her and didnt realize it until I lost her. Do you think its just my emotions? Oh yea and I forgot to add that her bf knows about me and she said he knows you wont be outta my life till i say so. like jeez

[smackie9]

Stop being her friend, it just makes the breakup a long painful death. You are wasting your time, and you should be chillin with single chicks. She moved on and so should you.


She is just string you along and you are fool enough to believe there could be a second chance. She's lying to you bro.

[calebos10]

Yea i thought soo too. Dating a virgin pretty much is the proof

[calebos10]

Its just hard :**(

[smackie9]

Dude it takes time, but it won't take that long if you make the effort to move on....go no contact.

[calebos10]

I have been going no contact but she makes it so hard. She says how i matter so much to her. That she would love to just talk with me and know whats going on and sorts. I texted her friend which was bad on my part. She got pissed and i kept telling her that i am happy for her and her bf and i wish them the best of luck. So i kept saying that for me to get over you and not look at you as a ex or as a gf then i need time to myself. She kept saying we can just keep contact on fb. I unfriended her and all but all i do is think about her and I just really think she is in a rebound relationship.

[smackie9]

Even if it's a rebound relationship, don't be some poor shlep that waits in the side lines for sloppy seconds.

What if this relationhsip goes on for a year?? and then she hooks up with some other guy. No you need to cut her out. Trust me if you want to be more desirable to her, you need to ignore her....this will put the fear into her that she will never see you again. That is how it works.

[calebos10]

Yea ik. I havent talked to her since and now she is showing off. Pretty fast for only dating for a week lol. Also her bf is a virgin so idk if he will have sex with her alot. Cuz we had great sex. And usually virgins arent good. No offense. But Im debating if i should get a rebound but more hook up related than any serious stuff.