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Thread: I can't breath..

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jan 2014
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    Female
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    I can't breath..

    So.. my story. I was with my boyfriend for over 3 years. We lived together and then one day he just woke up, saying he'd felt bad for the past two days, and now he wanted to end it. It came so sudden.. I love him so much. We were planning our lives together and now I'm supposed to just move on but every time I think of him I feel like I can't breath. I don't miss having 'someone' around, I'm more independent than that, I just miss HIM.. everything about him. I think it makes it worse that I didn't do anything wrong, and neither did he. He just felt bad and wanted time to figure himself out - no need to analyze this, he's not lying, and I know. I also know more details around it but I don't want to bring it up. But I highly doubt he'll come back, he said so himself. I suppose I am just connected to that pain now..

    I don't have any friends.. in one month our lease is up (although he's already moved out) and I feel stuck.. I'm moving back home, and I have absolutely no one to talk to. I'm also the one who have to pack up our entire lives.. by myself. We were exactly what I always wanted in a relationship - different. And have issues.. I'm sick with this will-never-go-away-thing, I never want kids and I have serious trouble letting someone in.. I don't think I'll ever find someone else ever again.. and in the meantime everyone I know is getting engaged or married. I just want to hide away in a closet for the rest of my life..

    Please help me.. I feel so alone.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jan 2014
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    Female
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    I recently separated from my gf of 5 years. I also feel friendless. Today I talked to a therapist that suggested joining groups that do activities I enjoy, like hiking and biking. I had thought of it before. I just didn't have the courage to do so before but now I almost don't care about what others might think. I think feeling friendless also makes the feelings more intense. I know it's hard after thinking you were both going to have a life together but you will get through it. That's why I believe many of us need to get reacquainted with ourselves after a break up. This past weekend was hard, I felt like wrapping myself into a cocoon and hibernating for a few months.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Mar 2013
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    Female
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    Spain
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    It's hard, Indriz, but some people aren't meant to be forever in our lives. This is one of the hardest lessons to learn but also one of the most valuable. Emotional detachment comes at a big price but the strength and the wisdom you acquire in this process will help you grow as a person and experience happiness in ways unknown to you yet.

    It is impossible for you to understand now, but you will look back one day and realise that it was the right thing, because somewhere else new and better adventures and more love are waiting for you.

    I personally have never had an ''easy separation", but in spite of the inevitable sufferance I always ended up winning more than I had before and finally understood that the best thing is always moving on and opening to life when it changes its way. Good luck.
    Last edited by Valixy; 30-01-14 at 02:18 AM.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Jan 2014
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    Female
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    Thank you..

    Thank you for your answers. It means the world right now. I know I won't feel sad forever, and some times I even feel as if it's for the better. Still at times I get a wave of sadness over me.. thinking about all the things we've done together, all the things we will never do again and I just miss him so much my heart hurts and I can't think clearly.
    Time will help, I know that, so for now I try to keep busy. Try not to think that he's going to come back to me, and just keep making time pass me by.

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