Annoyance to be found.

[_galaxy_hipster]

Hi everyone,

I think I'm bisexual maybe -please no hate- and there is this girl I work with of which I have a crush on. For those of you who saw my last post it's not my boss, another lady I work with (my age). She pretty, sweet, lovely in general.

Basically I want to talk to her but I don't know.. She's the one I sort out my working dates with. So I only speak to her then when we email and when we see each other at work. I work in a gift shop by the way.

I was just on 7 week school holidays, so I didn't work at all. Every time I'm around the suburb of which I work in, I always feel tempted to walk in and say hi to her, or email a hello. Except she works a lot and I'm worried I may be getting in the way.

I also fear that she doesn't really like me back and that she only speaks to me for work. I have low self esteem so maybe I'm making something small into a big deal.

Basically, I want to talk to her but I am worried I might be annoying.

I mean when we talk I love it, but I feel like I have been an annoyance after. Help?:/

- xo

[seecrithiding]

Just do it man, you'll never know if you don't try.

[smackie9]

Does she has the same sexual orientation as you? If she does why not ask her for a coffee somewhere after work and hang out. People tend to be different on their personal time.

[_galaxy_hipster]

Does she has the same sexual orientation as you? If she does why not ask her for a coffee somewhere after work and hang out. People tend to be different on their personal time.

NO idea. Im too scared to ask..

[Boisdevie]

Regardless of your sexual orientation is it a good idea to have relationships with work colleagues? If things go tits up it can make work life very difficult.

[michelle23]

I dont think its a good idea if you dont know whether she is gay or bi. Plus like boisdevie said-you are work colleagues. It could get v messy

[Mattiemae]

Yes, really not a good idea! Business and personal life never mix in the first place. On the other hand, that can be considered sexual harassment, and you could lose your job just because you are bisexual and bringing that out. On the other hand she may be very offended if she's straight, and perhaps you're reading more into it. She may just be very friendly, caring, and sensitive to others.

[smackie9]

NO idea. Im too scared to ask..

It would be best to just be friendly and not think too much about it. Your anxiety only gets worse if you over analyze what people think. People in general don't think negatively or judge, they just carry on with their tasks. I believe this is most of your problem. Stop worrying period. I know work seems like a good place to maybe hook up with someone but it's not. It's ok for making friends but not much more. Relationships/ friendships can take months to develop so you need to slow down and just go with the flow. The key is to know if you are being ignored that's the time to back off.

If you want to me other girls you are best to do it outside of work, go out with friends to parties, hangout at a club etc. The only way you can have what you want is to learn to socialize on some level. They are not going to plop into your lap.

You need to work on your anxiety issues a little at a time, but it will get better for you if you keep challenging yourself when you take yourself out of your comfort zone.