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Thread: Why did he disappear?! Please respond. TIME SENSITIVE

  1. #16
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    It's making me feel less insecure and more F*** Him!
    Well congratulations for starting to frame yourself as the prize instead of framing him as the prize and leaving your sanity and happiness in his hands ~ He who has yet to earn any of that from you.

    Let us know how it goes.. if you actually get together on your "date." At this point it doesn't matter if you contact him to see whats up, if he doesn't respond then you know just how little he does value you. Don't believe any bullshit excuse either (if he contacts you after the date night and apologizes) It takes two seconds to text someone with "don't be mad but I can't make it tonight. Will call you tomorrow..."
    “The willingness to accept responsibility for one’s own life is the source from which self-respect springs.” ~Joan Didion

  2. #17
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    Quote Originally Posted by smackie9 View Post
    Go by their actions and not what they tell you, because if it doesn't feel right, then it's not. A. he might be married or have a GF, or B. he got a better offer.

    Let this one go.

    @Smackie9 I choose your A. Hear this one...

    I started talking with this guy on-line about a month. He had a nice profile, really nice profile, single, has kids ( But, might want more kids ) according to his profile. We shared pictures. He cancelled the first Date, because of some illness, which am sure was true. So, he apologize and ask for a second Date. On the day we were supposed to meet the second time, he called me befor noon to cancel the Date, saying he is at the doctor and it might be that he will have to stay over night. So, he promised to call in the evening of that same day, which he never did.

    Normally i would have just forget about him and not even bothered to call. But i was a bit worried, because he said he was with the doctor, so i thought it will be nice to write and ask if all went well. So, i wrote to ask how he was doing and if all went well with his second doctor's appointment. I didn't get any reply.

    Waited for a couple of days, then i wrote him again, still didn't get no reply. At this time, i wasn't even thinking about the "Date", but i was a bit worried if his visit to the doctor went well or not. On the tenth day, after hearing nothing from him. Today, i decided to use his mail address name to find him on Facebook ( I didn't even know if he uses Facebook or not ). Just wanted to know if all is well with him so i can stop contacting him.

    I found out that this guy who put up a Profile on this dating site is not a single man, as he stated. His relationship Status in Facebook shows he is "In A Relationship" and he has 4 kids! And since the day he called me to cancel the second Date, he has been active on Facebook, sending messages his friends, to his kids and girlfriend, sharing pictures, e.t.c till hours ago.

    I was not just disappointed, but i actually did feel sorry for his girlfriend and his 4 kids who had no ideal what daddy is doing. His profile was good and well written. That he is looking forward to settle down, for long term-relationship.

    So, why would someone who has 4 children and a girlfriend set up a Profile in a dating website?

  3. #18
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    Because he is in the process of wanting to have an affair but couldn't go through with it. There might be boredom in the relationship so he felt that maybe spicing up things for his ego he wanted to see what he could catch out there. After he was "that close" to going through with it he probably realized what was at stake so on the day you were to be together he showed his appreciation to all these people in his life.

    If it were me I would send him a message that he should work on his relationship with his GF instead of cheating.

  4. #19
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    Quote Originally Posted by smackie9 View Post

    If it were me I would send him a message that he should work on his relationship with his GF instead of cheating.

    This was exactly what i thought, i was going to do. To ask him, why he would want to hurt his 4 kids and his girlfriend, i see him as a blessed man. All he needs to work on the relationship.

    And i am so happy and excited that he cancelled the two Dates. I felt so relieved!

    (I would only send him the message if he did write back someday. Being that i already found out myself, am glad he is well and okay and wouldn't bother contacting him. )
    Last edited by rest77; 23-02-14 at 02:39 PM.

  5. #20
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    I wouldn't ask him anything, just the fact that you know. By doing so you could be responsible for saving a relationship and keeping a family together.

  6. #21
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    Thanks for the input everyone. My guy finally did text me back saying that his daughter is now spending the night with him. I don't know if I believe it or not and after days of not communicating and suddenly having a sleepover with his daughter I'm not really interested in finding out. In my opinion he has sent the message loud and clear at this point. I replied to his message with "Ok. Have fun" and now heading out with my girlfriends tonight ( not about to waste a babysitter! Lol) when I see him Monday morning I will kill him with kindness. On to the next!

  7. #22
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    hahaha...how convenient.....if it moves like a duck, quacks like a duck...IT IS A DUCK!!

    He just bailed

  8. #23
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    Quote Originally Posted by Smila View Post
    .....if it moves like a duck, quacks like a duck...IT IS A DUCK!! He just bailed
    lol

  9. #24
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    Quote Originally Posted by ccmorgan View Post
    . My guy finally did text me back
    Does that mean that you did have to text him to find out if you were still on?
    He didn't contact you to let you know?

    Doesn't matter anyway, the guys a dick. Don't let him hoover you back in.
    “The willingness to accept responsibility for one’s own life is the source from which self-respect springs.” ~Joan Didion

  10. #25
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    Yes I did text him. Short and sweet asked if we were still on. He replied many hours later with. Babe (insert daughters name) is coming home with me tonight . I responded have fun and deleted him from my phone before I texted him about how I'm NOT his "babe". Now I know why he's single! I'm lucky I dodged the bullet since he showed his true colors so early on. I didn't even have to waste a cute outfit on him!

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