WIll He Return?

[tanragagirl]

We dated for about 9 months assuming we did not break up now. He is 19 and I am 21. I felt something special with him i still do not know what it was. I lost my virginity to him because it just felt right. However he was immature. See I was dealing with things ( an assault that happened a year ago at the time) since I had not gotten proper treatent right after the anniversary of the assault really affected my mental state. He was supportive at first but then somewhere along the way it became too much and he lost empathy. He just did not understand my condition.
Anyways I continued treatment and moved back home ( we were living together). At home our arguments grew because of well me. I craved attention. He was my distraction from the pain and depression. He was the only thing tht kept me alive. I was suffocating him.

But as I got better I began becoming more independent. I didn't need him to be happy. His behavior did not affect my mood. I began to LIVE again. However, he saw that I was moving away from him noticing the maturity he lacked. He did mention how at times he felt inferior to me once but I think that feeling went away when I was undergoing treatment. However it might have returned when I began to get better. I do not know

We had some unresolved problems at the time that I wanted to bring up but When he sensed me moving away he said how the wound he received from a pellet gun had become severely infected. I thought to clear the air once he was released from the hospital. However, another argument occured and he then diffused the argument by saying how he may be dying because the infection was spreading uncontrollably. He said how the antibiotics were not working and that he may have sepsis. I cried so much and was full of tremendous grief. .

The next two days his demeanor did not reflect that of a dying man so I asked him to send me a picture of him hooked to his IV as proof. He sent me a picture and it seemed odd. So I scanned it with a program only to discover he photoshoped his face into the body of another patient hooked to IVs. I confronted him and said how I planed on coming down there with one of my paramedic friends to further inquire. He agreed but a few minutes later said how I was not to bring my friend and if I did he would consider that we broke up. I questioned why and he said because it would seem as if he was not there for his girl friend.

I reply 'ok. As you wish/' and next thing you know he deactivates his email and fb and phone leaving me no way to contact him. I am guessing this is because he is ashamed?
It has almost been 2 weeks now and he has not contacted me. My question is do you think he will ever contact me again? To try to clear the air? To defend himself? yes I know he is not worth my time but I would just like to hear what you guys think.
Is he doing this so he can manipulate me so I can miss him and go back to him?

- - - Updated - - -

he went through so much trouble to lie to me to keep me

[Wakeup]

next thing you know he deactivates his email and fb and phone leaving me no way to contact him.

Wow. That was your lucky day. Now you can get on with your life without him in it... Just as you wished.

[tanragagirl]

Wow. That was your lucky day. Now you can get on with your life without him in it... Just as you wished.

I don't know. I miss him. We were so close I have never experienced the love I experienced for him.

[basilandthyme]

You'll get all the same answers as last time you asked this. Suggest you re-read your previous post

[Wakeup]

I don't know. I miss him. We were so close I have never experienced the love I experienced for him.

Well, while you pine away and waste your emotions on him you will never get the opportunity to experience love again because you are not open and ready to. Men find women like you to be quite invisible because you're so closed off to anything new.

What a waste of your life waiting around and wondering if someone that you were never meant to live a LIFEtime with will come back to you. Don't you agree that it's time you started to do the mental work you need to do to put him in the past so you can again experience love?

[tanragagirl]

Well, while you pine away and waste your emotions on him you will never get the opportunity to experience love again because you are not open and ready to. Men find women like you to be quite invisible because you're so closed off to anything new.

What a waste of your life waiting around and wondering if someone that you were never meant to live a LIFEtime with will come back to you. Don't you agree that it's time you started to do the mental work you need to do to put him in the past so you can again experience love?

What a waste of your life waiting around and wondering if someone that you were never meant to live a LIFEtime with will come back to you. Don't you agree that it's time you started to do the mental work you need to do to put him in the past so you can again experience love?[/QUOTE]

I guess i am just afarid to open up again. I did it once to this guy so shouldn't I wait to see if he'll come back? I just don't want to re-experience the heart ache. I honestly thought HE is my one true love??

- - - Updated - - -

You'll get all the same answers as last time you asked this. Suggest you re-read your previous post

I apologize or re-posting a simialr question it is just i DO miss him. I remember all the great times and miss him just haven;t come to the realization that this happened

[LnghrnFan]

It sounds like there are some serious trust issues here. It may be better if he doesn't contact you again! Give yourself time to heal before you get into another relationship. Just figure out what you want in a future husband so you don't end up in this type of situation again. Good luck!

[pcmaster]

Guy blocked FB and phone so that hints he cut you out of his life. Let it stay that way. Dont read into it, no matter what theres no excuse, that was rude. Move on, let go, be confident and dont look back.

You have your whole life ahead. The best is yet to follow.

loveforum.net/threads/85672-Guide-How-to-deal-with-breakup

[basilandthyme]

The relationship sounds like a trainwreck because of your emotional instability and his lack of maturity. If this trainwreck is how you define 'one true love' then you need to kick yourself up the rear end into some reality.

And for what it's worth, there is no 'one true love'. One true love is the stuff of fairytales. Let's be realistic: there are many good men out there with whom you could find an even better love.

Being afraid to open up again is such a waste of your life. Do you usually stop trying the first time something in your life goes wrong? If so, you'll never succeed at any part of your life.

Yes, I'm being blunt, but I suspect you need a drop kick into reality here.

[Wakeup]

I guess i am just afarid to open up again. I did it once to this guy so shouldn't I wait to see if he'll come back?

You should wait to date until you're feeling a little more indifferent to this guy you write the thread about but you should NOT wait to see if he'll come back. Doing that just keeps you stuck in hope and unable to move on from him.

I just don't want to re-experience the heart ache. I honestly thought HE is my one true love??

He was your only love so far. There will definitely be others but first you have to get over this stagnated state of hope you're in. Accept that its over. Do not anticipate his return. Get to the stage of indifference to him which will come with time. Then you'll be open and ready to meet the next true love. Hopefully you'll pick well and it will be your last true love until death do you part.

[tanragagirl]

The relationship sounds like a trainwreck because of your emotional instability and his lack of maturity. If this trainwreck is how you define 'one true love' then you need to kick yourself up the rear end into some reality.

And for what it's worth, there is no 'one true love'. One true love is the stuff of fairytales. Let's be realistic: there are many good men out there with whom you could find an even better love.

Being afraid to open up again is such a waste of your life. Do you usually stop trying the first time something in your life goes wrong? If so, you'll never succeed at any part of your life.

Yes, I'm being blunt, but I suspect you need a drop kick into reality here.

No no I love blunt. Thank you I do need that. I guess I just get lonely at times and think about him. I definitely need to heal and deal with myself first. Just sometimes I need a kick in the butt and that is why I post here