I need help. I'll keep it short!

[Ovrheat]

Hey all, I'm new here! I hope you're fine . I'm posting this cause I want to know your opinion on what happened to me. First off, I'm a guy. A nice guy. Maybe too nice .

So, to keep it short, I've always been a lone wolf, till I got to the university, made a group of girl-friends, I fell in love with a girl madly and I won't get into many details because it would take alot of time but in short, I asked her out, she said she liked me a bit, she sent me signs that she did, but then she said she didnt want anything with me. That was my life. It was me fighting for her love for 7 months. She made me think she had a crush on me sometimes, and sometimes it was the complete opposite. I can't count with my fingers the nights I spent crying because she didn't love me. We ALWAYS stayed friends, even if we argued about being together or not most of the time, she never let me go of her life.

Then, she did something (which I found out later it was just to annoy me) that really, really made me mad. I said I didn't want anything to do with her after that and that our friendship was over. A week later, she texts me saying she has a gift for me but she doesn't show up. Next day, I text her, we meet up, and we kiss for the first time. She said we weren't gonna be together but we'd be "friends with beneficts". We spent a month like that. She tested me alot, I was really jealous all the time... My jealousy got to a point where she said we wouldn't be FWB anymore, the semester was ending and we got distant, I waited a week hoping that the same from last time would happen and it didn't. Each week I texted her hoping for an answer, I tried calling her until she picked up and said I was a fake friend and that she never liked me, that what she said one time that she had feeling for me were lies. I was devastated! And I decided to move on with my life. A month later, bam. She texts me "Hey friend."

We got closer to each other till we finally got together. After 8 months, my dream came true. After so many sacrifices, nights spent crying, so many things I did for her... I told her one night, before we actually got together that I knew the things she went through in life and that I was always gonna be there for her and she shed some tears of joy (I believe they were), and we hugged.

BUT... When we were in the relationship, each little argument ended up in her saying "We're over". She broke up with me 7 times in a month!! Until she just said "I'm disgusted with you, don't ever text me again". I was so desperate! I tried talking to her and she never replied. She blocked my phone so I couldn't call her, and everything went to hell... When we were together we always talked about our future and she really seemed to be interested in me being part of her life, she said she was in love with me, she said that guys like me were really unique, she said so many things man!! I believed everything... We broke up on december 1st and on the 24th she texts me for the first time, comes to my house and drops a gift I gave her when we were friends, said she didn't want to keep anything that's mine

Mid january, we wrote to each other indirectly on Twitter as if we were fools!! Why would she stalk me on Twitter! I have a reason, I loved her!! But why would she stalk me if she broke up with me? I decided to do the smart thing and stop stalking her, I closed my Twitter and deleted her number from my phone. 2 weeks after that, I put her number back in my phone and she didn't have me blocked in WhatsApp. I text her "You unblocked me?" And she anwered me "No!!! My WhatsApp got deleted a few days ago, didn't know it unblocked people". And I said "Oh haha. It feels weird to text you, I guess I kinda miss it. Hope you're doing fine... Block me again if you want". She said "Ok." But didn't block me. Next day I sent her a 10 minute long voice note telling her again how much I loved her and that I couldn't believe that everything was gone and then I told her to block me if she wanted. She said she wasn't planning on blocking me but "Since you're gonna keep insisting"... And she blocked me. It's been 2 weeks since that happened, and I decided to move on cause that was not sane for me.

Why would she say she was in love with me if it wasn't true? Hope you took the time to read it and I missed alot of details, important ones, but I don't wanna make this too long... Why would she dump me after everything I did for her?! Thanks in advance for your answers...

Good night.

[surfhb2]

Because she gets a kick out of playing with your emotions.

You have serious issues with the ladies my friend. You put them on pedestals and refuse to understand the consequences of your actions

[michelle23]

Your being a doormat mate and until you learn to respect yourself, nobody else will. Your too needy and desperate. She says jump and you say how high.. shes playing with you and will keep doing so as long as you let her. You need to toughen up a bit and realize there is a big difference between being a nice guy and just being a fool for someone. Let her go and stop humiliating yourself

[flourens]

Because she knows that you like her. She tries to take advantage of your feelings and you let her do so. You think that your love for her is strong enough to persuade her to like (love) you the way you love (like) her.
Right from the start, you were clear about your intentions to and feelings for her. Fair enough, she told you that she likes you just a bit. She was willing to try where your "relationship" might take you. When she told you that she didn't want anything from you, you should have already stopped putting yourself in agony.
I think that her making you feel like she does have a crush on you is a way for her to make you keep on liking her. (There are girls out there who feel good when they know someone likes them and is willing to stick to his feelings for her.) They just love the idea of someone liking them but not willing to reciprocate. The way I see it, she is like that. And you shouldn't keep on holding on to her because nobody deserves to be treated like the way she treats you. Have to courage to let everything go and start loving yourself more so that the next time you fall for a girl, the girl will know your real worth.

Sent from my ME172V using Tapatalk

[Ovrheat]

Because she gets a kick out of playing with your emotions.

You have serious issues with the ladies my friend. You put them on pedestals and refuse to understand the consequences of your actions

Thanks for your reply! My friends said the same, that she had fun by making me suffer... I thought I knew her... And yeah, this was my first relationship ever, I guess the fact that she was 3 years older than me didn't help.. I loved her too much regardless of the way she humiliated me I stayed by her side...

- - - Updated - - -

Your being a doormat mate and until you learn to respect yourself, nobody else will. Your too needy and desperate. She says jump and you say how high.. shes playing with you and will keep doing so as long as you let her. You need to toughen up a bit and realize there is a big difference between being a nice guy and just being a fool for someone. Let her go and stop humiliating yourself

Thanks for your answer! I do seem pretty desperate, she was my first love and I didn't want to lose her, didn't have the courage to put her in her place when I was supposed to do it...

- - - Updated - - -

Because she knows that you like her. She tries to take advantage of your feelings and you let her do so. You think that your love for her is strong enough to persuade her to like (love) you the way you love (like) her.
Right from the start, you were clear about your intentions to and feelings for her. Fair enough, she told you that she likes you just a bit. She was willing to try where your "relationship" might take you. When she told you that she didn't want anything from you, you should have already stopped putting yourself in agony.
I think that her making you feel like she does have a crush on you is a way for her to make you keep on liking her. (There are girls out there who feel good when they know someone likes them and is willing to stick to his feelings for her.) They just love the idea of someone liking them but not willing to reciprocate. The way I see it, she is like that. And you shouldn't keep on holding on to her because nobody deserves to be treated like the way she treats you. Have to courage to let everything go and start loving yourself more so that the next time you fall for a girl, the girl will know your real worth.

Sent from my ME172V using Tapatalk

Thanks for the reply! I will let go now. I wish everything didn't go the way it did, I wish I didn't keep trying after the first time she rejected me. I guess I was just blinded by my feelings because when she and I broke up, all my friends said, in different words, "I told you she was a b.... and you wouldn't listen to me"

[TheEvilJester]

Letting go is definitely your best bet. This gal most definitely sounds like the type who just likes to play with people's hearts. Sorry that you wound up with somebody like that in your first relationship ever. You deserve better than that. Anybody would. You should have stopped going after her the first time she played this crappy games with you. I can understand why you did not, though. It can be hard not to become overly attached to your first relationship. This girl is not worth the hassle she has put you through.

Even if she comes crawling back, begging you to get back with her, you need to say no. Forget her and move on. Some day you will find a girl who will appreciate you, and treat you the way you deserve. When you do, you will realize why you should never have spent a second going after this girl once she showed her true colors. Good luck!

[Ovrheat]

Letting go is definitely your best bet. This gal most definitely sounds like the type who just likes to play with people's hearts. Sorry that you wound up with somebody like that in your first relationship ever. You deserve better than that. Anybody would. You should have stopped going after her the first time she played this crappy games with you. I can understand why you did not, though. It can be hard not to become overly attached to your first relationship. This girl is not worth the hassle she has put you through.

Even if she comes crawling back, begging you to get back with her, you need to say no. Forget her and move on. Some day you will find a girl who will appreciate you, and treat you the way you deserve. When you do, you will realize why you should never have spent a second going after this girl once she showed her true colors. Good luck!

Thanks alot! Like you said, I got really attached to her since she was my first ever girlfriend, and I think I decided to see only the good things and never realized how much damage I was suffering emotionally. Thanks alot for the advice, I will let go, it's the best for me

[TheEvilJester]

Thanks alot! Like you said, I got really attached to her since she was my first ever girlfriend, and I think I decided to see only the good things and never realized how much damage I was suffering emotionally. Thanks alot for the advice, I will let go, it's the best for me

That is definitely something of which a lot of people are guilt at some point in their lives. It's almost like deep down you know this person is not good, but you just so badly want them to be good. You so badly want to make a connection like that with somebody. To have some kind of relationship. So, you ignore red flags, even when they are sometimes glaring. You maybe don't realize you are doing it, but you do. It is especially hard when it is your first relationship. New relationships are always exciting and new at first. The very first time you are in one, it is all uncharted territory. So, it can be hard not to just think "Well, this is how it always is." But, people like this girl of yours, people like my ex, they way they are is NOT okay. It is not just "always how it is."

Getting out of a relationship like that is the best way to realize that. Good for you, and good luck, my friend.