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Thread: I never kissed a girl, and I'm 18 years old.

  1. #1
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    I never kissed a girl, and I'm 18 years old.

    Hi guys, I'm new here so good morning!

    Yeah, to start my story:

    My parents raised me well but never gave me 'sexual education'(meaning: explaining how everything worked.)
    So I pretty much learned everything from friends.
    Anyway, it never occurred to me that you could kiss a girl until my friends started doing this.
    I wasn't that smooth, looking back I see a lot of opportunities where I could have kissed a girl.
    Also, my confidence was low. I have been in love quite sometimes but I never had the guts to ask someone out.

    When I was 16 I realised I didn't want a relationship, I wanted to be free.
    So now I'm 18 and never kissed a girl.

    Currently, there's this girl I like and my friends like her as well.
    Since I never done this before:

    What's the best way to ask her out? (Just out of the blue? Or when seeing her: "wanna go for a drink?")
    And how long do you mostly wait to kiss a girl?

    I realise I look like a complete noob(which I am on this 'subject'), so I hope you guys won't shoot me down

  2. #2
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    18 really isn't late to get started, so don't be hard on yourself.

    How well do you know this girl? It will make a difference to your approach.

    How long to wait before kissing really depends on the couple and the experience of each person. Could be anywhere from first date to weeks down the track. It will happen when you're both ready.
    Never regret anything that has happened in your life. It cannot be changed, forgotten or undone. So, take it as a lesson learned and move on.

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    Thanks!

    It's more that I when I look back had a lot of chances but didn't see kissing as an opportunity till now.

    I went on a group vacation with friends and a 40 other people I didn't know. She was one of them.
    At that time I wasn't looking for something. She held her party a few months ago and she invited from the 50 people only me and 4 others cause we had a good time then.
    It's already a long time since I've seen her but when I got nothing on my hands I keep thinking of her though..
    We talk sometimes over Whatsapp but she lives a while away from me.

    May I ask if you have a relationship with someone?

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    You are only 18 so you still have time.

    I am already 28 years old and am still completely untouched (have never kissed, hugged or had sex with any girl). I never had a girlfriend either and life is completely passing me by.

    At the age of 28 most normal people had at least one girlfriend and already had sex at least one time so I am left behind most people and life is passing me by.

    I get a bit depressed sometimes that life is passing me by like this. I'm probably never going to meet anyone relationship-wise and I will probably always be lonely and sad.
    Last edited by uri; 11-03-14 at 03:12 AM.

  5. #5
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    Hi Uri,

    I'm like you but 10 years younger. In my opinion it is needed to go out there and doing something despite you're extremely scared.
    Stepping out of your comfortzone. I too realise that the girl I like maybe likes another guy but that won't hold me from trying.
    If you've never tried you only live with dreams and regrets I think.

    What have you done to get out of the situation?

  6. #6
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    Quote Originally Posted by thegrey View Post
    What have you done to get out of the situation?
    I have done nothing. Women are simply not attracted to me in a sexual way and I can't blame them really because I am poor, ugly and fat. So I have not much to offer them, at least not right now (if ever).

    I also have several medical problems which make it difficult for me to get a job, wake up early every morning and go to work like every normal person.
    Last edited by uri; 11-03-14 at 09:35 AM.

  7. #7
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    When two people kiss they create a really long tube with @ssholes on both ends.
    Doubt kills more dreams than failure ever will

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    You should already know what to do, it's getting there is the problem. She is just a girl so set your mind that she is just like anyone else you know and talk to. If you put a girl up on a pedistal, it only intimidates you, preventing you from making a move. Never run things in your mind about when you should hold hand, when you should kiss her etc. Nobody with experience does that. You take it as it comes, it's never planned. Just ask her out and get to know her through conversation over a coffee or drink. A first date should be simple, no fancy dinner, and don't spend too much money. Just find a place where you two can talk for about an hour. If things go well, you CALL (not text) her the next day, say you had a great time and ask her out again. If she says yes good, if she gives you excuses, that's a no. No big deal you just move on and ask a different girl out and repeat.

    So stop worrying about kissing and all that crap, get a few dates in first.
    Last edited by smackie9; 12-03-14 at 10:02 AM.

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    @smackie9: Thanks for the advice! Still wondering though about how to ask her. Since I don't see her often anymore it's difficult to ask in person. I don't like texting or whatsapp because that's so impersonal. But calling her to ask her out seems a little weird 'cause we never called and it makes it so official. Only whatsapped and spoke a lot during holiday. So what would your advice be on how to get dating. I don't think it would be gentlemanlike to go dating with someone you don't like just to learn the ropes.

    @uri: that sucks man, hope you can get out of this situation!

    @pcmaster: Haha the beautiful truth

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    Huh, why doesn't my reply show up although I posted it yesterday?

    Then again:

    @smackie9: Thanks a lot for the advice! Although I am still wondering about how I should ask her out. We always Whatsapp or talk in real life. To ask her out via Whatsapp seems a little lame to me honestly. And we never call so that would make it so official. I don't see her a lot anymore so in real life asking is also difficult.

    @uri: Sorry to hear man! Is there really nothing you can do about it?

    @pcmaster: Truth has been spoken
    Last edited by thegrey; 12-03-14 at 09:40 AM.

  11. #11
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    My posts don't show up!

    Haha only that one shows up.

    Anyway:

    @smackie9: I think that's a good idea, thanks! But I'm still wondering how to ask her out. We talk via Whatsapp or in real life. In real life I don't see her anymore and asking via whatsapp seems kinda lame. Calling on the other hand makes it so official, so what would you do? I haven't seen her in a while.

    @uri: That's a pity. Maybe you should try a new sport or new hobby so you meet new people. Or something like a philosophical group, don't know where your interests are..

    @pcmaster: Such wise words.
    Last edited by thegrey; 12-03-14 at 03:51 PM.

  12. #12
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    Quote Originally Posted by thegrey View Post
    My posts don't show up!
    this one did
    Never regret anything that has happened in your life. It cannot be changed, forgotten or undone. So, take it as a lesson learned and move on.

  13. #13
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    Haha only that one shows up.

    Anyway:

    @smackie9: I think that's a good idea, thanks! But I'm still wondering how to ask her out. We talk via Whatsapp or in real life. In real life I don't see her anymore and asking via whatsapp seems kinda lame. Calling on the other hand makes it so official, so what would you do? I haven't seen her in a while.

    @uri: That's a pity. Maybe you should try a new sport or new hobby so you meet new people. Or something like a philosophical group, don't know where your interests are..

    @pcmaster: Such wise words!

  14. #14
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    but how to ask her out? Whatsapp isn't good and calling her is too official. Wait till i see her?(which may take a long time)

  15. #15
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    Quote Originally Posted by thegrey View Post
    Hi guys, I'm new here so good morning!

    Yeah, to start my story:

    My parents raised me well but never gave me 'sexual education'(meaning: explaining how everything worked.)
    So I pretty much learned everything from friends.
    Anyway, it never occurred to me that you could kiss a girl until my friends started doing this.
    I wasn't that smooth, looking back I see a lot of opportunities where I could have kissed a girl.
    Also, my confidence was low. I have been in love quite sometimes but I never had the guts to ask someone out.

    When I was 16 I realised I didn't want a relationship, I wanted to be free.
    So now I'm 18 and never kissed a girl.

    Currently, there's this girl I like and my friends like her as well.
    Since I never done this before:

    What's the best way to ask her out? (Just out of the blue? Or when seeing her: "wanna go for a drink?")
    And how long do you mostly wait to kiss a girl?

    I realise I look like a complete noob(which I am on this 'subject'), so I hope you guys won't shoot me down

    First of all, this is an astonishing and genuine piece-of-writing, pal. Glad to see that thread up! Second of all, there's no shame and no erring the fact you've not yet kissed a girl, it's all fine. Each person has his own mentality, emotionalism, and sexual preparedness. It's probably not of critical, neither over-edging.

    Regarding the subject, I could share with you some advises and suggestions. The first step of the process, you have to seat yourself down, and think; take a glance from third-person-view, think about your TRUE feelings to the girl, and make yourself understand how exactly much you like her, and if you would really like this to get serious - I had a few problems for not considering this in my past with girls. The second step - after you have considered everything and had a monologue with yourself - is to get to know her better in the personal plot, you know, you will have to characterize her and analyze her details of personality - just to not make a wrong step with her. The third you could do, would be a good one, if you will get her somehow interested in you, you have to fascinate her (either with your charm, with your knowledge, with your honesty, with your living-experience, with your overall behavior and manners). If you get the third step successful, you will proceed much more easily towards a thriving relationship with her. After that, you just keep getting closer and bond a good relationship with her.

    (TIP): If you will have a walk around the nature before meeting with her, you will receive great energies, which might be an advantage for you.
    (TIP): Don't think about the kiss, think about the love you can grant her, the emotions you could share with her. Once it will feel intimate enough, and when it will feel right for you, take a slow step, imply her that you're interested in a kiss; then you will figure out her interest in kissing you, or not.
    (TIP): Don't wrap-up into your nutshell, feel free and be communicative, don't get her bored and your discussion/meeting dull.

    That's all I can give you this time, fella. Hopefully you will get my advice, and will implement it!

    PS!!!! Don't call her out via cellphone or any other technological device. You have to look at her eyes when you call her out! You have to!
    Last edited by Yes-WE-Can; 24-03-14 at 08:00 AM.

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