Now What Do I Do?

[ladyluck87]

The guy that I have been dating for the last 5-6 months told me yesterday that he things that I have done like telling him that I wanted to cut him off for something's that I didn't like made him fall back. However, I have felt a way about our "relationship" simply because he has stated on several occasions that he was not ready for a serious relationship...he didn't know where things would go..and most recently it was "I don't know. I don't know. I just know that I'm not ready right now, and I don't know when I'm going to be ready." He has told me on several occasions that he is exclusive with me, but he is just isn't ready. He told me that sometimes the little things that we disagree or argue over are is the primary reason that he doesn't have a girlfriend right now because he doesn't want to deal with the drama of it. So I asked him what does he want to do, and he says "I don't know. We can still chill. It's whatever. Wanna go get something to eat tonight?".

It's confusing because he told me that certain things make push away some, but he's never stopped calling or texting. In fact, the other day...we had a little discussion, and he went out of his way to show me screen shots, then texted me for days after that. He even called me at like 5 am on Sunday morning...I guess to see what I was doing. He has acted like a boyfriend...huge and beautiful Valentine's together and also not really liking other guys around. How can you claim me at a club on a Saturday night but a week later still "not be ready for a relationship"?

Overall, I am growing tired of the confusion. He acts one way. Says something else. Says that some of the things that I do push him away...but continues to call and text like normal...even explaining himself....even saying in the same breath...."But we can still chill. Wanna go out for food tonight?" ?! The only thing I have asked of him is to give me some idea of what the end goal would be because at 6 months...you don't have to be ready, but you at least should know what you want from a person. I do hold myself responsible for things that I have done...but I still just feel like he's wasting my time whether things are good between us or we are going through something.

My question is...now what do I do?

[Boisdevie]

The guy is clearly a dick. So why do put up with this 'oh I don't know' bullshit? My advice - dump the chump and find a real man who knows exactly what he wants.

[basilandthyme]

A week or so ago, most of us advised you that six months is still very early to expect an end goal and that you should chill out. However, as it seem you are unwilling to do this, then I think it's wise to dump this guy and find someone who's operating on a timeline similar to yours. Unless you make a change to your outlook, you are currently incompatible.

The one thing that I would also add is that while it's too early to know what he wants with you, it's not too early for him to have a general plan of what he wants for his own life? Does he see himself married one day (not to you, just in general). What's he looking for in a relationship (not with you, just in general)