what should i do help.....

[maxylove]

my best friend...i dnt know when he got too controlling...and my bad luck i was in love with him and guard less...couldn't get myself out ...ahh so painful...he was dominating controlling in every aspects especially in physical touch...he never listened to my no...instead keep on pushing me and pissing me and yelling at me and of course manipulating arguments...why you dnt come to me...tooooooooooo possessive i guess....but trust me this are the traits i am recognizing now...when it was happening to me i was unable to recognize what is he doing...but whatever he is very possessive...says he cant live without me ..says i own u...i have right over you...and i dnt need your permission to touch you because your mine....now im out of love...yelling at him why you did it i trusted you...he is still here wanting to marry him...i remember i felt very hard in love with him..so weak i was selfless and guard less ,he just tortured me like hell....physical mental torture..abusement everything...now he cries he never wanted to hurt me and all he need in this life is me...but im not in a good condition ...i feel like im a mental patient...what has he done....more and more i am getting out of weakness more and more im feeling tortured....what should i do....i am a very simple girl who believes in true love pure love ,nothing else ....i cant believe this kind of ownership exist in this world...i thought its just in movies...like the one in perfume...but i couldnt recognize it during that time...stupid me...i got myself hurt...but i guess it was too late for me to recognize because i was so in love....i trusted him .h is my best friend...how could he be like this ..i didnt know he will be like this suddenly...he finished me....i just wana slap him hard....he is still waiting for me to marry him...

[Boisdevie]

.couldn't get myself out.

Couldn't manage to write coherent sentences either.

[maxylove]

forget it....my language is not even english....if you could help me that would be better....

[the_last_jedi]

I don't understand very well what kind of relationship you have: are you only best friends, or is he really your boyfriend?

Anyway, if he is acting in that way, and you feel really uncomfortable with it, the only option is leaving to live with him and leaving to have contact at all with him. This is very hard, I know, but when someone feels so extremely tired of that attitude as you seems, the only option is making a clean break.

[michelle23]

He is abusing you mentally, emotionally, verbally, sexually and it will eventually result with you dead on a slab in the morgue if you dont get away from him now. You need help. Is there anyone you trust that can help you get away?

You also need to get a restraining order against him so start gathering evidence now. Your going to need it. This guy wont let you go without a fight and you need to be prepared.

Hes volatile and dangerous so be careful and look after yourself and get away asap

Hugs

[basilandthyme]

It's not your bad luck to be in love with him - it was your bad judgement.

However, I can't understand what your current situation is with him, so I really can't answer your question.

[maxylove]

i went through hell ...now im almost out of weakness....and im avoiding him too....i wanted to marry him but now i dnt know...now he is texting me and calling me.....the problem is he is our family friend so he keep on coming...and you know its not my fault i misjudged him...u know why because my whole family and my brothers .whose in good relation with him ,always said to me he is a good man...my parents love him...we all know him and his family for like 20 years u can say....i was 7 when he used to visit our house.....you know just like my family i didnt know he was not stable or whatever...as he was always very caring and harmless.....see how come my fault....if i told my family about him now...i dnt now what they will do....just like my family trusts him like hell i did too....i cnt believe what happened.......


well the current situation....he kept on saying he is going through the pain as he hurted me....which he never wanted to.....he says he cant sleep at night...cnt eat...and he wants to see me happy....three days before he visited us and he is so weak by health i mean....like a dead person...he says its because he is in pain because i am...and he torture himself daily and yell at himself for what he has done to me.....he says he loves me and cant live without me and he says i want to see you smile again....but im not responding that much

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ofcourse not friend...he wants to marry me ...but now i dnt know what to do

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you people wont believe it took almost one and a half years to get out of this possessive torturing circle...the reason well i told you i was weak and on his side he was on the full power of controlling and forcing me and pushing me hard to come near to him and i used to stop but he didnt...but i was guard less and i just hate now how falling in love makes you so weak and guard less that if you are in the wrong hands ,,,you are destroyed.....i trusted him that is why i let my guards down...otherwise im not a fool to let myself torture by another human...

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i know you will be bored of me but i dnt know why...you read it or not i tell you about myself .........i like it here...very good people out here.....

i am an artist...i love arts..well crazy about it...i do paintings sculptures etc etc... i am a creative writer too...well i am a one man girl...i believe in physical touch after marriage..i think its beautiful how you fell in love with somebody and you propose him or her and you marry and with that beautiful feelings you care and care and love love and love that person...and with that one kiss you take all his her pain away...one kiss that calms and cures both the souls......i saved myself for one guy but this guy gave no regard of my feelings of what and how i wanted it...and forcefully touched me...it was bad so bad...it ruined me my soul...my peace ...my individuality...i know you will call me crazy or whatever....but i never watched sex videos or dirty stuff like that..the reason i just cannot manipulate myself my soul and the guy who will enter my life will know that i was always sincere and i loved him even when i never met him yet...reason i think love is heavenly beautiful...i waited and waited for it to happen and in that wait i saved myself from manipulating....ufffh....hmm....but life is so unpredictable...wow....a hole in my soul now....my love got wasted everything i mean my personality...im damaged man....hmm...forget it....im still save i believe because this what happened is abusement nothing less ...thats it..i wanna slap him hard

[michelle23]

Hes just trying to manipulate you and suck you back in. You need to say no and tell him its over for good. And you do need to tell your family how he hurt you. By keeping silent you are letting him win.

Your idea of love is a fairytale. One kiss will never take all your pain away. Love in real life is nothing like a movie. It can be stable, loving and fun but not the way you describe. Your view of love makes you vulnerable. He was probably charming and treated you like a queen, very romantic and all fluff. Thats how he manipulated you because you believe in all that mushy crap. Decent men dont woo you or charm you or say all the right the things. They dont have a clue how to be romantic and thats how you know you can trust them

[maxylove]

xea..well that was good michelle....i know i am fantasy kind of girl...but one kiss doesnt exactly mean one kiss..i mean the way love can cure you......but thanks your good
....

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he kept on saying he became possessive nothing else.and he never wanted to hurt me...and he proposed me today too...and i didnt respond and he said he will wait...and he also said all i want is your happiness if you want to leave me you can..but he will cry for sure because he loves me more than anything in this world thats what he said..he says you can punish me however you like ..n if you want to push me off the cliff you can ..just be happy...if killing me makes you happy then you should do it because i deserve it....i said i need a space from you and he said ill do whatever you like but ill tell you i cnt live without you but ill do it for your wish...... one more thing he even told his family that i am the girl he wishes to marry...his sister told me ...

[maxylove]

i dnt know what to do...really....

[maxylove]

i am going to therapist and ask for help...because i am not able to make a decision..maybe its because i love him too much but i dont feel right...

[chinagirl]

I cannot decipher your post maxylove... Sorry I can't help.

[maxylove]

he abused me verbally emotionally and forced me into physical touch against my will....as he says i belong to him...and he own me and has a right over me and he dont need my permission to touch me because im his....whenever i say something even bad about myself he says shut up too me ...that dnt say anything about my thing :O...and the tone is so nerve wrecking and heart pinching that i wana cut his throat right away...ufffff...he tortures alot....i was trap in this circle for about 2 years...his circle never stopped ...he never admits until now that he abused me and says he became possessive and never wanted to hurt me...whatever...he is not stable.....maybe now you can understand a bit.....and rest you can read from previous post if you need more into it...

its my english ,,you dont understand.:I..sorry for that... its not my language...but im trying to write and express so maybe i could get some help ...please try to understand...

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its mostly forcement in physical touch...i used to say no...and there was a huge manipulative argument..he pressurized me and forced me threat to leave me or if not this then used to emotionally and verbally abused me...i told before i was guard less and weak as i was in love with him which is why it became more easy for me to be under his control...

one more thing during that period i used to ask him why you forces me and his reply was i couldnt tolerate even a single second to stay away from you....his touch was such a disrespect and not in a gentle or seducing way it was yakh and sexual...ohhh...so bad ...i am also planing to get him arrested..right now i am handling it alone and haven't told my family yet.....and i am afraid of telling them....:I....

he is the guy whom i spend my childhood too...we grew up together..very good family relations....my gosh i dnt know how my family will react....if i told them i dnt think ill be needing police to do the job:O...he will be dead..oh....there will be an Armageddon between two families...:O

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what should i do i dnt know.....he even told my family through his family and himself that he wishes to marry me...and both families are so hapyy ...celebrating:I...eh...ah shoot....my family so happy that their girl got the best man on earth..:O...as he was always from the childhood a decent gentleman...oppsss....but now only i know the face behind this decent caring face....

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please tell me what to do.....