I trust her... but...

[sdawson]

I'm engaged. Set to get married in roughly a year or so.

I'm extremely happy with this woman, she makes me smile, and she's the most honest and caring person
I have been with, ever.

But...

She left her phone at home the other night. She used mine to check a message on her facebook with an
address of somewhere we were going. She didn't log out.

I didn't SNOOP through her messages, or any notifications, but when i went to go sign out, i clicked the activity
button and seen she'd been looking up several ex boyfriends. Not every day, but quite frequently.

Im just curious... Should this be a red flag to me? I don't normally if ever look up my exs. Does this mean she
may not be over them completely? Or is this just a sign of curiosity?

Her cousin was over this weekend... My lady still has her cousin's ex on facebook, so her cousin asked if she
could go through his page. The entire time it was "omg, what a loser"... but why do women really care? They
aren't together anymore. My lady is happy, she tells me she is, shows it, seems enthused at our life, and doesn't
really seem interested in anyone else other than myself. But I don't understand why she feels the need to
look up her ex boyfriends that frequently.

Any insight would be great.

Thank you

[AnErin]

Some people just like to get on FB and look up people.
It isn't like the old days when looking up someone would take a lot of time and resources.

The only "red flag" is when you said about getting married in a year or so. Like it is a frivolous plan. You know how many rednecks live off a lover and say "Yep, that there is my fiance".

BTW just how many boyfriends/"fiances" has she had? Are you sure all the men are her ex lovers?

[sdawson]

There are about 2 or 3 that she looks up quite frequently...

I don't see how 'getting married in a year or so' is a red flag. Im happy about it and excited, but the date is still up in the air. We have a general date in mind but having an issue solidifying a venue for that date as well as the particularly important things such as catering lol.

She's had about 12 total men she's 'been with'... but like i said, it seemed to be only 2 or 3 that she looks up once and a while. Atleast one every couple days. I just feel like if you're that devoted to being married, or the relationship you're in, that maybe constantly looking up your exes is a suggestion that you're not quite happy or over those people? Maybe a grass is greener situation?

[bekho]

Once you've been through 12, I think its hard for them to matter enough to cause any trouble. Think of those guys as like her distant family or ex colleagues. If however, she's looking up only one guy all the time... Then I would red flag it.

Sent from my Nexus 4 using Tapatalk

[sdawson]

Yea I suppose... I'm not really sure. I mean... We talk, she's told me about them and such. Which probably isn't ideal either, its in the past it should stay there.

Two of them cheated on her, they're her most recents. And the other is a guy who is a bit older than her, well off, and they 'dated' for 2 weeks or so but stayed in touch, went for dinner once and a while. But he seems a bit into her still, especially since he found out she's engaged. She doesn't talk to him, but he's tried a few times to get ahold of her and make plans to go for dinner and such.

The one that cheated lives a couple provinces away, so he's not really in her life at all either. She has no pleasant feelings for him. The other she went out to the bar and found him there with another girl... That didnt last long at all.

I guess i'm just having a hard time understanding WHY... why look them up? Whats the point? Curiosity how their lives are going?

[surfhb2]

C'mon dude! You never looked up an ex girlfriend on Facebook?

Get over it and enjoy marriage

[Smila]

NO big deal...she is just curious. Everyone has looked up their ex..once in a while....

[sdawson]

Once and a while. sure. but weekly?