I feel like the best years for love are behind me? Are they?

[Inexadra]

I'm 28 years old, which basically means I'm 30. When I look at all my 20-something Facebook friends who are coupled/engaged/married and enjoying the bliss of love in their 20s, I realize that if I'm ever to enjoy the bliss of a long-term relationship and/or marriage, it'll be in my 30s.

Yet, aren't your 20s your best years of your life? Aren't your 20s the best years for love? Doesn't love lose a lot of its allure and joy as you age?

I just look at all my Facebook friends who are coupled and I'm so jealous of the joy and love they get to have every day, and how happy they must be. I wish I could be happy like them, but how can I be happy if I'm single? (If love isn't bliss, then why stay in it?)

[THX]

Inexadra. I came from a small town where people got married young. Like 18 to early 20's. It sets this example that if you are not married by 25 something is wrong with you. I then moved to a large city and things are totally different. Late teens and 20's are looked at as your time to explore the world and have multiple experiences. Saving Marriage for later. Neither version is right or wrong.

Around half of marriages end in divorce. My personal belief is that more mature people have a better chance of making thier relationship last because they have worked past a lot of thier own bullshit. Remember that perception is reality. If you believe happy relationships have a shelf life that is past the expiration date you will almost certainly prove yourself right.

This is your 1 and only life. Fight for it. Leave nothing to chance. Read books that will expand your awareness of things you may not even know you are doing that turn men off. Join and attend meet up groups. Push your comfort zone.

On each mans personal list of attractive qualities in a woman, I don't think quitter is on any of them.

Life has thrown you a challenge. Rise to it.

[TheEvilJester]

I know just how you feel. I am 30, and just over a year ago got out of a long term relationship that was really bad for me. In a lot of ways, I was kind of p*$$ed about the whole situation. I was thinking to myself, I wasted the best years of my life with somebody who didn't deserve them. But, you know what I have learned? They were NOT the best years of my life, and it was precisely BECAUSE they were spent with the wrong person.

The best years of my life are now, because I got myself out of that situation and have grown so much as a person through doing that, in ways I never felt possible. The best years of my life are in the future, when I finally find the woman I was meant to spend my life with, and we fall in love. Pardon the cliche, but 30 is the new 20. LOL! Quite honestly, you are only TECHNICALLY an adult when you are in your late teens and early 20's. In all honesty, you are still a kid. Your late 20's and on are where it is really all at. (Do the kids still say that these days? LOL)

Plus, as THX said (likely in very crisp, quality sound) over half of marriages end in divorce these days. Meaning a lot of people wind up single around our age, sometimes even later. A lot of them don't let that stop them.

You will find your soulmate someday, if that is truly what you want. I know it can be hard to see that at times like this, but it will happen. 28 is still young. Enjoy your true adult years now. Be happy with yourself (trust me, I know how hard that can be). In time, it will come. If you ask me, relationships are so much better when you are truly adults. You know more what you want out of life and don't have to play ridiculous games as much. Good luck, my friend. I truly believe that we both have our soulmate out there waiting for us. I can't help but doubt I'll ever find mine, but I will never give up. Either way, I am so extremely happy just in myself, so at least I have that.

[surfhb2]

Your 30s are, by far, the best years of your life. As you get older you'll realize this. You start making good money, you're mature enough to understand who and what you want. Most older people would say your 20s are a blur....I agree too. That's why it kills me to see kids in their early 20s having kids and getting married

You're right on track my friend Just relax and enjoy life

[Inexadra]

This is your 1 and only life. Fight for it. Leave nothing to chance. Read books that will expand your awareness of things you may not even know you are doing that turn men off. Join and attend meet up groups. Push your comfort zone.

On each mans personal list of attractive qualities in a woman, I don't think quitter is on any of them.

Life has thrown you a challenge. Rise to it.

I'm a male. Would any woman ever want to date a man over 30 who had never been married?

What am I supposed to think when I go out in public and see these blissful couples everywhere (and even pretending your relationship is blissful is enough to make it so, usually)? How do I look coupled people in the eye when being single is considered a deficiency, an indicator that there's something fundamentally wrong with you as a human being?

[dem862]

Just because they are together doesn't mean they are blissful. Most of my 20's were spent drinking, partying, and in a series of failed relationships. I got married and raised a family in my 30's. 40's were spent consolidating my life, loves, and finances. I look forward to my 50's with hope and excitement and appreciation for all the learning that took place the previous decades, but in no way would I ever want to repeat them.

[andreababe2214]

Hi there? Wanna chat or talk ?

[TheEvilJester]

I'm a male. Would any woman ever want to date a man over 30 who had never been married?

What am I supposed to think when I go out in public and see these blissful couples everywhere (and even pretending your relationship is blissful is enough to make it so, usually)? How do I look coupled people in the eye when being single is considered a deficiency, an indicator that there's something fundamentally wrong with you as a human being?

Everybody is single at some point in their life. Not to mention, not every relationship lasts, and most people are single for a period of time after one ends. There is nothing wrong with being single. Not even in your 30's. Not ever. There is also nothing wrong with never having been married by your 30's. Like I said, I feel like your late 20's into your 30's are really the best time to find a good relationship (be it one you are already in, or a new one you find then). You are typically more mature, and have at least some picture of where you want to go in life, and are usually on your way there.

Not to mention, emotionally people are usually much more mature and aware of what love really is. I mean... to some degree. I think in many ways, nobody will ever really fully know. Anyway, you are too young to worry about this. It will come in time. Which doesn't mean you should just sit back and hope it happens to you. Ask women out. Have fun. But, just don't sweat it too much. It will happen. I know it doesn't seem that way, but life finds a way. Good luck, my friend.

[pcmaster]

My best days been together with people I love and/or when I took best care of myself. Age are just a number. Few hundreat years ago in my country if girl are way over 15 and still not married then theres something wrong with her. These are all society standarts and you shouldnt look at them cause they are changing. Dont become statistics. When you will be happy that will be exact right time to be happy. What comes slow, comes good.

[HeartIsAching]

Heh... you're just having a typical 'young person' moment.

30's aren't bad at all - not really different from your 20's. Halfway through my 40's, I still feel pretty good, and have a fantastic sex life with my wife. Quit stressin'.

[THX]

Would any woman ever want to date a man over 30 who had never been married?

Think of your favorite music group. Think if an artist came around who made simular music. Would you penalize that artist for coming out with great music after they are 30 or would you just enjoy it?

Women care about the way you make them feel. Period. If you are not hung up over your past they wont be.

I had a 22 year old GF when I was 34. I told her I lost my V card at the age of 31. She said , "Oh so you're kind of like the real life version of the 41 year old virgin." I said , "Yeah" and laughed and that was the last time we talked about it.

I would never mention that other than to show how unimportant such things are. She knew I wasn't hung up on it so she wasn't.

Your barriers are illusions.

[TheEvilJester]

Couldn't help myself, but the movie was actually "40 Year Old Virgin." Not 41. LOL! Sorry. Couldn't resist. That was a good movie.