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Thread: My boyfriend won't stop watching porn

  1. #1
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    My boyfriend won't stop watching porn

    My boyfriend and I have been together for almost 2 years now, and he's always been watching porn (approximately 3 or 4 times a week.) I'm 100% against watching porn when you're in a relationship and I've told him many times. Yesterday, we had another talk and he said he'd reduce the number of times he watches porn a week. But it's still not enough for me. I told him I wanted him to stop completely, and he didn't want to (for now). Since it is so easily accessible, he said that it would be too hard to resist.

    Do you guys think it's normal or does he have a problem?

    Thank you for sharing your opinions.

  2. #2
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    Addiction to porn actualy comes from addiction from internet so one have to cut time spending in internet in order to fight porn addiction.
    Doubt kills more dreams than failure ever will

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    Quote Originally Posted by itsjustmeok View Post
    My boyfriend and I have been together for almost 2 years now, and he's always been watching porn (approximately 3 or 4 times a week.) I'm 100% against watching porn when you're in a relationship and I've told him many times. Yesterday, we had another talk and he said he'd reduce the number of times he watches porn a week. But it's still not enough for me. I told him I wanted him to stop completely, and he didn't want to (for now). Since it is so easily accessible, he said that it would be too hard to resist.

    Do you guys think it's normal or does he have a problem?

    Thank you for sharing your opinions.
    Do you have sex with him as many times a week as he watches porn? Even if you are having sex with him everyday, twice a day the likely hood that he watched just as many times would still be there. Why does him watching porn bother you if he isn't neglecting you in bed? Is he neglecting you in bed?

    Sighs: So many questions, so little time.
    “The willingness to accept responsibility for one’s own life is the source from which self-respect springs.” ~Joan Didion

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    I don't see the problem. Is his porn-watching negatively affecting your sex life? If not, why are you against it? If so, why are you still with him after 2 years of lousy sex?

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    We don't have sex as much as he watches porn, but I'm okay with the amount of times we have sex every week. We have sex everytime we feel like it and he says he's satisfied too. The thing is, I don't like the fact he watches other girls to stimulate him. If I truly am good enough, he shouldn't need that kind of stuff.

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    Have you ever masturbated, itsjustmeok? You know how during masturbation you tend to think about stuff that turns you on? Well, porn is the same thing for some people. Instead of thinking about fantasies, they like to *look* at them. It's really the same thing: it doesn't mean that he isn't satisfied with you or that you "aren't enough". It's just masturbation.

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    Quote Originally Posted by itsjustmeok View Post
    My boyfriend and I have been together for almost 2 years now, and he's always been watching porn (approximately 3 or 4 times a week.) I'm 100% against watching porn when you're in a relationship and I've told him many times. Yesterday, we had another talk and he said he'd reduce the number of times he watches porn a week. But it's still not enough for me. I told him I wanted him to stop completely, and he didn't want to (for now). Since it is so easily accessible, he said that it would be too hard to resist.

    Do you guys think it's normal or does he have a problem?

    Thank you for sharing your opinions.
    No he doesn't but you do....you don't like a guy that watches porn? Then don't date a guy that watches porn....you don't have to acept it, so stop your complaining and breakup with him. Let him find someone that doesn't have a problem with it.

    - - - Updated - - -

    Quote Originally Posted by itsjustmeok View Post
    We don't have sex as much as he watches porn, but I'm okay with the amount of times we have sex every week. We have sex everytime we feel like it and he says he's satisfied too. The thing is, I don't like the fact he watches other girls to stimulate him. If I truly am good enough, he shouldn't need that kind of stuff.
    You truly don't understand men. They like variety because they have a more intense sex drive than women do. There is no emotion involved, it's just stimulation, a different experience. It's just an aid to enhance the masturbation experience, entertainment. Tip: men think about sex and other women all the time, and your BF is no different. I think it's self to think that YOU are all he shouuld desire and think about....that is a fairytale. Sorry to slap you with the reality but it is what it is.

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    Quote Originally Posted by itsjustmeok View Post
    The thing is, I don't like the fact he watches other girls to stimulate him. If I truly am good enough, he shouldn't need that kind of stuff.
    Well there's your problem. If you didn't have such a unrealistic idea about yourself, there wouldn't be your jealousy and insecurity issues.

    Men, hell PEOPLE are visual creatures and need variety in what they are viewing. You and you alone are NEVER going to be enough for one guy to view for the rest of his life. He's with you and he's chosen you to actually copulate with so what he looks at (as long as its not wrecking havoc on your sex life) has nothing to do with you being "good enough."

    What will you do when/if he stops watching porn but thinks in his head (mental visualization) about the girl in the bikini he saw on T.V. or at the beach and gets mentally aroused thinking about that sight? Will you still think that you should be good enough and he shouldn't be visualizing other women? That's totally unrealistic thinking if you do. Just because people are in a relationship they DO NOT stop finding other people attractive. They just don't.

    None of us will ever be "good enough" to stop the other from looking. Ever!

    That being said, if you can't wrap your head around his viewing then do what Smackie says and find someone who thinks like you. Good luck with that. You may find someone who isn't sussed about looking at porn but they certainly won't stop looking.
    “The willingness to accept responsibility for one’s own life is the source from which self-respect springs.” ~Joan Didion

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    Quote Originally Posted by Wakeup View Post
    Well there's your problem. If you didn't have such a unrealistic idea about yourself, there wouldn't be your jealousy and insecurity issues.
    100 percent perfect advice. Still, won't stop the woman complaining all the ****ing time will it?

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    Quote Originally Posted by itsjustmeok View Post
    My boyfriend and I have been together for almost 2 years now, and he's always been watching porn (approximately 3 or 4 times a week.) I'm 100% against watching porn when you're in a relationship and I've told him many times. Yesterday, we had another talk and he said he'd reduce the number of times he watches porn a week. But it's still not enough for me. I told him I wanted him to stop completely, and he didn't want to (for now). Since it is so easily accessible, he said that it would be too hard to resist.

    Do you guys think it's normal or does he have a problem?

    Thank you for sharing your opinions.
    You know very little about men! LOL

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    The problem here is that you have different sex drives. Your not satisfying him in bed. Have more sex with him if you want to minimize the issue or else break up with him. Having sex 1-2 times a week is really not enough. Does he not satisfy you in bed? Is that why you dont want to do it more? If yes, then you need to speak up and tell him what you need in bed.

    Your sex life is below average and you really need to spice it up.
    "Don't ask a question if you can't handle the answer".

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    No, it's not a difference in their sex drives, it's a difference in their level of security, and a total lack of understanding on the OP's part that she doesn't get to dictate to her BF what he does with himself in his spare time:

    "I'm 100% against watching porn when you're in a relationship and I've told him many times."

    So despite her numerous attempts to brow-beat him into what she wants him to do, he pig-headedly insists on doing what he wants. Her problem, not his.

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    Quote Originally Posted by michelle23 View Post
    The problem here is that you have different sex drives. Your not satisfying him in bed.
    That's not it at all (IMO). Even if you did him three times a day, everyday, OP and you were giving uninhibited porn-style sex then he'd still masturbate to some visual stimulation (mental or with porn).

    Have more sex with him if you want to minimize the issue
    More sex is not the issue.

    or else break up with him. Having sex 1-2 times a week is really not enough.
    That is subjective. If that is what is good for the two of them, then it is enough and there is absolutely no evidence within the op's posts that show he's been complaining about incompatible libidos.

    It doesn't matter if she breaks up with him. Her insecurity and the fact that she thinks that she "should be enough for him" that is the problem that she will take with her in any new relationship she forms. Its her mindset that needs changing up.

    - - - Updated - - -

    Yesterday, we had another talk and he said he'd reduce the number of times he watches porn a week. But it's still not enough for me.
    Then leave him because by now, it should be clear to you that he has no intentions of stopping
    “The willingness to accept responsibility for one’s own life is the source from which self-respect springs.” ~Joan Didion

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    OMG, I had sex with my wife 5x this week... and she's not home and I'm horny... whatever shall I do?!

    Oh... right. I'll watch a li'l porn and exercise my 'rights'.

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    Hey there. Porn really isn't such a big deal. It's just porn. Maybe it's not the girls themselves, it's what they're doing that turns him on. At least he listened to you a little bit and minimized the amount of porn he watches for you. I myself like porn, and the only reason I stopped watching porn is because of the viruses and sometimes hidden fees that some pornography websites cause and have. However, for me it's not the people themselves, it's what they're doing. That's it. Doesn't mean I fantasize about being with those men, because I believe my boyfriend to be way beyond good enough for me. Yes, men look. A majority of them do though there really are those very very rare men who can judge whether or not another woman is attractive, but who thinks that they have nothing on their girl. Don't you sometimes look? Not because you would ever do anything to your boyfriend or think he's not good enough, but because that shirtless man jogging down the street, or at the beach/pool is nice to just look at?

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