22 y.o. with feelings for an escort. Difficult situation.

[KingZ]

And smiling its total BS that "most" men do this. That is just your way of justifying it to yourself.

The numbers would probably blow your mind. I've paid for sex before; it was fantastic.

[smiling100]

I dont feel threatened by it but I do think its wrong on a lot of levels and nothing you say will change my mind on that. I think you lot would be better off spending your money on a therapist.

And smiling its total BS that "most" men do this. That is just your way of justifying it to yourself.

Read this Michelle written by a sexual therapist

Read the comments section as well.

www.smh.com.au/lifestyle/life/why-some-men-see-sex-workers-20140414-36mci.html



The fact is that all women are prostitutes and all men pay for sex. All women expect a man to pay for admission. Dating, pretending to be interested in what you're saying, buying you dinner, putting on the dog-and-pony show etc is all just haggling over price in order to get you into bed. Men don't care about the chick-lot you read, or your favourite chick-flicks, or your favourite bars, or your shoes, or your handbags, or your haircut, or your job. We're faking an interest to stroke your ego in order to appeal to your narcissism to get you into bed.

Prostitution just removes the need to go through all that tedious charade. It's an honest transaction that proves cheaper and easier in the long run without all the drama and hassles.

We all sell labour and time in exchange for cash, too. So that typical argument is moot, also. I don't like my job but have to trudge in Mon-Fri to earn an income. But it took me 2 bachelor degrees and 2 Masters degrees to earn me what some 20yo hottie can earn doing 3 nights per week without any qualifications.

The other advantage with prostitutes is you can score a chick far hotter (and sober) than you can picking up in a bar/dating websites etc.

Prostitution is the most honest transaction between men and women.

Commenter
Bender

April 15, 2014, 8:49AM

- - - Updated - - -

I'm just constantly torn between pain and happiness. I am ashamed at myself for having such a lack of control over how i feel, how i know she sees other men and gives them the same passion. I fear that to her I am just a sin that she confesses away at church. No matter whether she likes me or not, I am a sin. The whole point of confession is that she is forgiven by God for seeing me and tries not to sin again. Therefore i think that eventually she will want nothing to do with me anymore. I know this and yet i cannot let go and forget about her. I want to be able to just forget and move on, but i cannot, i wish i was able to get my old self back, but i cannot. Usually I am so full of "banter" and "laddish" jokes, but i have just not been myself. I know it's not just lust, I cannot quite explain it, I will be very hurt if she does not feel the same, but i will stay away from her and wish her the best.

I hear you. I felt very similar. Still do & its been 5 months today that we broke up. I have had no contact at all apart from seeing her a few times randomly as she works close by. That really hurts, it's like ripping the bandaid off. She still looks as gorgeous as ever. I would not be surprised in the least if she is seeing someone new. I do not want any evidence that this is true. I could find out through her best friends partner however I do not dare want to ask. I'd freak if I saw her holding hands with her new guy. I cross my fingers we do not cross paths.

I couldn't look at another woman until the past month though she is still on my pedestal, i'm 90% sure i'd still take her back if she wanted to reconcile. I felt I was just existing & was a shell of myself, lost weight, stopped eating, exercising & sleeping.

I simply could not feel anything for someone else no matter how attractive they were. My libido was totally gone. I felt ugly & unattractive, I was so not myself. It was scary. I was clinically depressed for 3 months.

I actually turned down a girl who I met a week after my breakup. I know I would of been attracted to her for sure if my ex wasn't in my head. That even made it more frustrating because my ex was in my thoughts 24/7 she was blocking me from progressing. Even yesterday I was driving remembering the good times with her & laughing to myself, then reality hit & I started crying realising it's not like that anymore. It's just a bad dream.

Now i'm on the road to recovery slowlllly i'd jump at the chance to ask this new girl again however I know she is now seeing someone.

It's going to take time to get her out of your system, just go no contact & detox her from your mind.




Good luck

[chinagirl]

Smiling 100, you should show this post to women who had gotten STD's from their boyfriends/ husbands who slept with prostitutes. Some of these women I knew died of AIDS and left their kids orphaned. Some had gotten hepatitis C and are still hoping for a cure.

[KingZ]

Some had gotten hepatitis C and are still hoping for a cure.

Hepatitis C? They're in luck!

http://www.bbc.com/news/health-26987653

>After 12 weeks, 191 of 208 patients no longer had hepatitis C, which increased to 165 of 172 patients, or 96%, after 24 weeks.

[smiling100]

Of course that's horrible China

Why did the boyfriends/husbands stray in the first place? I can only assume they were not in a very sexually fulfilling relationship now that kids are involved & the option of leaving their partner & losing custody of their children & financial loses wasn't an option.

It's not just prostitutes that spread std's btw? I've never had unprotected sex when i've paid for it & I know for a fact i'm std free.

[chinagirl]

Not really... The virus is still there and is transmittable. The viral load is just low that is not detected by a common test. And that's why it's more prevalent now than ever.

- - - Updated - - -

Barriers are not 100% by the way. Whatever reason they strayed, I don't think these women deserved to suffer. I'm not condemning prostitution but I do believe that people should be more responsible for their actions.

[smiling100]

Of course people should be more responsible for their actions. I don't condone partners paying for sex either.

That is something I have never done & would never do.

Life is unfair sometimes & it sucks that innocent people pay the penalty through no fault of their own. I did not want to be single, I wanted to spend the rest of my life with her however she chose to leave me & it hurt/s though it was her choice to throw me back into the singles scene. My goal is to delete her painful memories from my mind & it's my business what I do to move forward.

[afc2014]

Read this Michelle written by a sexual therapist

Read the comments section as well.




The fact is that all women are prostitutes and all men pay for sex. All women expect a man to pay for admission. Dating, pretending to be interested in what you're saying, buying you dinner, putting on the dog-and-pony show etc is all just haggling over price in order to get you into bed. Men don't care about the chick-lot you read, or your favourite chick-flicks, or your favourite bars, or your shoes, or your handbags, or your haircut, or your job. We're faking an interest to stroke your ego in order to appeal to your narcissism to get you into bed.

Prostitution just removes the need to go through all that tedious charade. It's an honest transaction that proves cheaper and easier in the long run without all the drama and hassles.

We all sell labour and time in exchange for cash, too. So that typical argument is moot, also. I don't like my job but have to trudge in Mon-Fri to earn an income. But it took me 2 bachelor degrees and 2 Masters degrees to earn me what some 20yo hottie can earn doing 3 nights per week without any qualifications.

The other advantage with prostitutes is you can score a chick far hotter (and sober) than you can picking up in a bar/dating websites etc.

Prostitution is the most honest transaction between men and women.

Commenter
Bender

April 15, 2014, 8:49AM

- - - Updated - - -





I hear you. I felt very similar. Still do & its been 5 months today that we broke up. I have had no contact at all apart from seeing her a few times randomly as she works close by. That really hurts, it's like ripping the bandaid off. She still looks as gorgeous as ever. I would not be surprised in the least if she is seeing someone new. I do not want any evidence that this is true. I could find out through her best friends partner however I do not dare want to ask. I'd freak if I saw her holding hands with her new guy. I cross my fingers we do not cross paths.

I couldn't look at another woman until the past month though she is still on my pedestal, i'm 90% sure i'd still take her back if she wanted to reconcile. I felt I was just existing & was a shell of myself, lost weight, stopped eating, exercising & sleeping.

I simply could not feel anything for someone else no matter how attractive they were. My libido was totally gone. I felt ugly & unattractive, I was so not myself. It was scary. I was clinically depressed for 3 months.

I actually turned down a girl who I met a week after my breakup. I know I would of been attracted to her for sure if my ex wasn't in my head. That even made it more frustrating because my ex was in my thoughts 24/7 she was blocking me from progressing. Even yesterday I was driving remembering the good times with her & laughing to myself, then reality hit & I started crying realising it's not like that anymore. It's just a bad dream.

Now i'm on the road to recovery slowlllly i'd jump at the chance to ask this new girl again however I know she is now seeing someone.

It's going to take time to get her out of your system, just go no contact & detox her from your mind.




Good luck

Yes, i won't lie, i can get another gf , and i have had many chances to do so in the past but i have
preferred to stay single and 'play the field'. But, right now i am in a very dark place. I wish i can just
put on a nice shirt and jacket, go out to a bar, get drunk and pull a girl... and enjoy it. You know, just forget.
But, i have been able to do nothing for a week now. I have lost all motivation to train hard at the gym, socialise and i have
just stopped being me. I cannot look at another women sexually without feeling disinterested, i wish i can reciprocate the interest
of the women around me in my life, but i cannot because i just don't feel anything.

It just feels like there is an emptiness in my chest all of the time now. Corny as hell but whatever. When i am with her, i hold back.I show
my affection in my own way, e.g. i slap her on the arse quite hard and she slaps me back, I like carrying her around when
we are kissing because it makes her laugh, I forgot my bag walking out of the apartment, i run back to get it and we kiss and I tell her
"I was too busy looking at your face, your fault ".

I think i am just going to try and be the one that puts a stop to this. One more time I will see her, I just don't want my sense of self confidence
to be destroyed by her if she does not feel the same. I refuse to pour my feelings out, rarely does that work well for men. I have to keep my cool
and try to lead this.

[michelle23]

No relationship would ever last if "all" men were just playing a game to get us into bed. Believe it or not but there are decent men around who do care about all the so called "BS" you mentioned. To some men sex isnt just sex. They also enjoy the intimacy and the bond it creates between two people. If that wernt true then no man would ever fall in love or get attached or be a good father and we wouldnt have so many men on here daily crying of a broken heart.. just saying

[pcmaster]

Its not easy to forget about her because they are pro. They put on and act and serves every client as special. So you might start feel like theres something about her. Just like in porn its just and act. What they do is called money, they know how to get it.

This will help you forget about her. 2nd and 3nd video will be especialy helpful.
loveforum.net/threads/85672-Guide-How-to-deal-with-breakup

[afc2014]

Its not easy to forget about her because they are pro. They put on and act and serves every client as special. So you might start feel like theres something about her. Just like in porn its just and act. What they do is called money, they know how to get it.

This will help you forget about her. 2nd and 3nd video will be especialy helpful.
loveforum.net/threads/85672-Guide-How-to-deal-with-breakup

Tbh it is all a bit sick if you are right and she uses her dead father as a way to try and get me emotionally invested in her. And her having to look after her younger sibling after it all and trying to find an answer (there was a storm and sibling got afraid, the girl said that it was daddy and God telling her they are alright). And for what? For half an hour of my money each time? She must feel good that she 'conquered' me then , she is a psychology degree graduate after all. I just don't want you to be right, i just really don't want that. Thank God I have not really "submitted" to her face to face though. I just do not want to end this on a "loss", i don't want to be the one with his ego knocked.

[smiling100]

No relationship would ever last if "all" men were just playing a game to get us into bed. Believe it or not but there are decent men around who do care about all the so called "BS" you mentioned. To some men sex isnt just sex. They also enjoy the intimacy and the bond it creates between two people. If that wernt true then no man would ever fall in love or get attached or be a good father and we wouldnt have so many men on here daily crying of a broken heart.. just saying

Michelle this is wear I am having issues with being honest to women.

No man (well 99% of them) is going to tell a women they have paid for sex. Certainly not your partner. I am telling you how it is & being real. Your reply is to belittle us for being honest. It's no wonder guys will not tell you, can you blame them. We are sexual creatures unfortunately.

I know if I wasn't so honest in my last relationship we would not of broke up (that's a fact) & I wouldn't be in the position I am today. It's sad to know & you are proving it that I will never be as honest to my next partner again. I need to be more selfish & put my feelings before them.

The guys who have no conscious & sleep behind their partners back & go home pretending nothing has happened are in my view kinda blessed as they can go back to their safe family life without the fear of having to rebuild their life again from scratch.

Something that I am doing right now which totally sucks. If I was selfish & didn't tell the truth I know I would not be in this position.

[IndiReloaded]

The only real problem with paying for sex in our conservative society is when you meet a woman you want to be with who doesn't approve. Then your choices are:

1. Don't tell her and hope she never finds out.

2. Don't fall for women who think paying for sex is sleazy.

I only have a problem with it in societies where the sex trade women are treated poorly. Give them training and benefits and, who knows, I might even consider sending my son to get his first experience with a professional (I mean a *real* professional, with a degree in Sex Ed) so that his judgement re: relationship material isn't clouded by the first girl who spreads her legs for him.

[dem862]

It seems to me, if you can't be honest with your life partner, then who can you be honest with?

[BackUpOrGetStng]

It seems to me, if you can't be honest with your life partner, then who can you be honest with?

Friends will be a lot more forgiving about this sort of thing than current lovers will be, since they're not, obligated to have sex with or otherwise romantically bound to you.