Less talkative being an issue. how to handle it ?

[arslan_sweeto1]

Hey guys . i am little stuck in things
I am a guy, 23 years of age, silent one. I am friendly kinda and funny person but don't get frank with girls at workplace for no reason. It seems stupid to me to start a self fabricated topic or find a lame topic to start discussion with girl. But this is where i think i am wrong. There are two instances actually to my loss.
i). There is a girl, Approx. two years senior to me. She admired my cuteness in front of my friends openly and not only one time but more than once. How i take it that she was interested in me. But i didn't want to start any such thing at workplace so i didn't forward with anything with her. This instance relates year ago. Last week she came across me after long time (as our area of work separated year ago). I said "Hi" to her (and my intentions was of respect, just like senior-junior relation) and she acted like she don't know me or something like that. WHAT I FELT THAT DAY THAT I MIGHT NOT HAVE HANDLED THE SITUATION QUITE WELL AT FIRST INSTANCE.
ii). There is a girl, Approx. a year junior to me. We got an opportunity to work together. My Habit of being silent. I hardly spoke to her whole day. One day, in front of out mutual friend, she said that i don't talk much. It was message from her to me that i should talk to her. but i wasn't interested to start any conversation with any girl for time pass purpose. i didn't talk to her much even then. This relates to six months ago. Last week, we came across each other quite a number of times but she ignored me at all and didn't even bother to say "Hi" for the purpose of junior-senior corporate ethics. What i think that these girls think that i ignore them on purpose.
How i should tackle the situation to my benefit. I mean i don't want girls to turn against me. How to develop friendly relationship with girls at workplace. so that they don't interpret my habit of less talking as against them. and how can i develop healthy friendly realationship with girls . what can be topics for discussion with girls.

[HeartIsAching]

LOL... seriously?

Ok... you've got to develop the skill (yes, skill) of 'small talk'. You don't run before you walk, and you don't walk before you crawl... you want to 'get there' with girls (women), you've gotta learn the art of small-talk.

[Satina]

Well, faking it ain't easy, and chitchatting certainly ain't fun if it's not something you enjoy, but if you really want to try to open up to women, then my advice is that you should observe how other people do it. Look at those obnoxious, extraverted, annoying people in the office and notice what do they do, how do they act, what do they say. Take mental notes: you could pick up some elements and make it your move and then use it yourself when the time comes for it, incorporating it little by little in your own behavior. Also watch movies and shows! Television is where you will find the best communicators and role models to learn from if you want to become a better communicator.

Communication skills are utterly important because they will get you far not only career-wise but of course with women as well! So it's very admirable that you are taking steps to improve this aspect!

Good luck!

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Also, a good thing to do if you're working with a coworker for the first time, is to say it flat out right at the start: "Hey by the way I'm not really talkative but if you have any questions feel free to ask I'm here to help." I'm sure this will go a long way and it'll start off any work relationship on the right foot!

[surfhb]

If you find a girl who you're interested in, don't you want to find out more about them? Start with that

[Pencil]

Is your workplace big? I'm not really into small talk, mainly it's because I simply don't want to (being an introvert). However, I do notice it's an essential skill to have, not just for romance.

I used to work in a big company and there was that one guy, super social with girls and guys equally, very admirable how he does that. He was almost too friendly to be true but I could see he was always sincere. That kind of inspired me to try and chat with people using a non-romantically approach. I think that would be your best starting point as well before you make the big leap of small-talk with girls you like... practice without the stress