What do i do?

[muttley84]

Hi,

ive been in a relationship for 7 years now we have 3 children.
but i no longer feel important or special to my partner
this has been going on for a few years now.
we dont have sex often at all. maybe once a month at best.
i want sex alot more its important to our relationship

i have spoken to her about this awhile ago she said she doesn't like sex because she put on weight after the children.
i dont feel loved in the relationship anymore but I'm not unhappy i guess the correct word would be content

but here is the thing.
in my search to feel special i met this polish women online.
we talk all day well her daytime not mine.
we traded pictures left each other you tube videos she said she loves me & im having feelings for her.
i have thought about calling it off but cant

the thing im confused with is do i risk everything i have worked hard for 7 years but now content do i risk it all for a chance to find happiness
& how much do the kids factor into the decision.
i love my children & want only the best for them
but i want to be happy

[smiling100]

Firstly how can this Polish girl possibly love you when you have never met? Not possible i'm afraid.

Secondly if you really love your kids (which I have no doubt you do) don't do the cowardly thing & jump into a new relationship when you have not even sorted out the one you are in at the moment.

You are setting yourself up for a really messy emotional experience that could end in disaster.

[muttley84]

i understand that we haven't met in person. but skyping messaging videos etc. i would say we know each other rather well.
the more i know this girl the more i feel connected to her.

i know what i need to do. is talk to my current partner work out where we are going before i decided anything with this other girl. even if this other women wasnt in the mix i would still have to sort out my current relationship first.

thanks for the advice

[smackie9]

You are just using this girl as an escape from your issues within your relationship. Man up and take my advise to seek out a professional counselor. You owe it to your common law wife and your 3 children. Remember internet affairs are 80% fantasy, and can get you deeply troubled with disappointment. They don't turn out the way you think you would and by the time you realize that you had more to lose than you thought.

[loverocker]

^Totally agreed with smackie, nice 1.

[Wakeup]

Hi,

ive been in a relationship for 7 years now we have 3 children.
but i no longer feel important or special to my partner
this has been going on for a few years now.
we dont have sex often at all. maybe once a month at best.

This is what I think based on your rather tunnel vision explanation of your dilemma: She doesn't want sex because every time you do have sex, she ends up pregnant. Three children in 7 years is too much so put on a rubber or get yourself a vasectomy and quit blaming her for not wanting sex with you. She's tired and her body and mind is rebelling against the strain.

i want sex alot more its important to our relationship

So is your understanding of what she's (IMO) going through. If you want more sex then go to the doctor and ask for a vasectomy so that she knows for sure she won't get pregnant again. Then, take her out on the town without the children and do something romantic and fun with her. Show her that you love her and enjoy her company, make it clear you value her for more then getting yours.

i have spoken to her about this awhile ago she said she doesn't like sex because she put on weight after the children.
i dont feel loved in the relationship anymore but I'm not unhappy i guess the correct word would be content

You are sounding more and more like a lousy husband.

but here is the thing.
in my search to feel special i met this polish women online.

Fvuck you and the polish woman you rode in on.

we talk all day well her daytime not mine.

Did you think giving all your attention to another woman would make your wife climb on top? What is wrong with you?

we traded pictures left each other you tube videos she said she loves me & im having feelings for her.

Did you tell her you were married with three children? If you did then fvuck you and the polish woman you rode in on. If you didn't tell her then fvuck you and the cheating twit that you are.

i have thought about calling it off but cant

Why.. does she have a gun to your head?

the thing im confused with is do i risk everything i have worked hard for 7 years but now content do i risk it all for a chance to find happiness
& how much do the kids factor into the decision.
i love my children & want only the best for them
but i want to be happy

Cool story bro.