What's up with the mind games - Playing hard to get?

[luckykristina]

've been casually seeing this guy for a month - He came on very strong at first. He would drive 50mi to come over a few times a week, text me daily and even get mad at me for "texting back too slow". He decided to leave one morning and deliberately ignore me for a week. So I ignored him back for another week -because that was rude and Im stubborn. When I decided to respond to his text (after a week) he was all excited and drove 50mi to see me... Leaves the next day, but this time he left his shirt (his favorite band T, btw) but has not initiated any contact for 4 days.

He seems to come on strong then pull back - very hot and cold. No he's leaving his things at my place, but ignoring me.

I don't like this- What should I do?

[lost_man]

silly mind games like this are not likely to make your life easier over time are they? move on.

[nico88]

If you like him then tell him to stop playing games and be straight with you. I mean shit...no body's got time for that.

[Wakeup]

've been casually seeing this guy for a month - He came on very strong at first. He would drive 50mi to come over a few times a week, text me daily and even get mad at me for "texting back too slow". He decided to leave one morning and deliberately ignore me for a week. So I ignored him back for another week -because that was rude and Im stubborn. When I decided to respond to his text (after a week) he was all excited and drove 50mi to see me... Leaves the next day, but this time he left his shirt (his favorite band T, btw) but has not initiated any contact for 4 days.

He seems to come on strong then pull back - very hot and cold. No he's leaving his things at my place, but ignoring me.

I don't like this- What should I do?

This is how it goes when you are in a booty call situation. He's not doing bonding rituals with you because he doesn't want you to put strings on the sex.

If you don't want to be a booty call then stop being booty. It's that simple.

BTW: You are playing games just as much if not more then him because you've agreed to be in a casual sexual relationship but your intentions are clearly stating that you want more then an orgasm from this douche. Make up YOUR mind what you want and then ask for that. if you don't have the nerve to talk to him then just accept the booty calls when them come and stop expectations of any kind other then getting laid.

Casual is what he is giving you. If you want more then communicate and if he doesn't want more then YOU have a decision to make.

[dontaskme]

It's a casual relationship, nothing more. There is no mind games being played there. If you want anything more than casual, then let him know.

[luckykristina]

This is how it goes when you are in a booty call situation. He's not doing bonding rituals with you because he doesn't want you to put strings on the sex.

I never put any strings on the sex. I am the one who made that clear to this guy from the beginning. I'm pretty sure this guy was trying to do the "bonding" by texting me every day. Everything was fine before he had to give me the silent treatment - I never asked him for anything. What's wrong with a simple text saying "thanks for the booty" and leaving it at that? Why trigger negative feelings by blatantly ignoring someone? It screws everything up... I don't need someone's attention all day long, I'm not that type. A little aknowlegement goes a long way. I just don't quite understand how you go from being completely attentive to being silent unless you really, really don't like that person at all or you're doing it to get a rise. What for????

[Belleann]

Are you starting to develop feelings for him? If not, who cares. You said that you made it clear that it was just casual sex, no strings attached so why do you even need a thank you? Have your orgasm and keep it moving.

[Wakeup]

I never put any strings on the sex. I am the one who made that clear to this guy from the beginning. I'm pretty sure this guy was trying to do the "bonding" by texting me every day. Everything was fine before he had to give me the silent treatment - I never asked him for anything. What's wrong with a simple text saying "thanks for the booty" and leaving it at that? Why trigger negative feelings by blatantly ignoring someone? It screws everything up... I don't need someone's attention all day long, I'm not that type. A little aknowlegement goes a long way. I just don't quite understand how you go from being completely attentive to being silent unless you really, really don't like that person at all or you're doing it to get a rise. What for????

You asking for a "thank you" for sex is a string and it's a silly one ffs. If you want to thank him then thank him at the door when he's leaving you until he's ready to see you again. If he's got any manners he'll thank you back or at least say "you're welcome" lolzzz

You want casual then he's showing you how he does casual. Accept it and enjoy or don't except it and don't let him back for more

If you were someone who actually can do casual in a manner that is correct for yourself then take back your personal power and tell him how it's going to be and if he doesn't do what you need then tell him to **** off.

You want casual and you're the one that proposed it then why aren't you running it?

I just don't quite understand how you go from being completely attentive to being silent

Thats how he does booty calls. If you aren't jiggy with it then end it and take back your personal power instead of leaving it in his inattentive hands.