So confused, said she needed time

[Galaxy1234]

Sry for the long post but i need advice. I have "dated" this girl for 2yrs and its somewhat complicated. When I first met her she wasn't what I was expecting, but as i got to know her I was very attracted. She really wanted to date me after a few weeks, but I was hesitant because we only seen each other one day a week and she didn't have a car which made it hard because of the hours i work at my job. We live pretty far apart and I have to get up very early for my job so during the week we really didn't see each other. After awhile she told me she wasn't up to this anymore and we stopped talking, I did really miss her during that time. After a few months of not speaking she called me and asked why I didn't call or text her i said i wanted too but wasn't sure if it was a good idea. When we spoke we made plans to hang out and when we did it was great we picked up where we left off, but with my job, where we lived, and her not having a car it only lasted a few months. We ended up speaking to each other again but after a while a same thing. We've been on and off the whole time we've known each other which sucks but we always seem to come back. Now back in April 2014 we ended up talking again and we seen each other about 5,6 days a week. I told her how I really felt about her and it was great because we made more of an effort with each other. Now the bad side, she went through an old photot album I had and seen a couple pics of my ex nothing sexual just old photots that I forgot I had. She said she wasn't comfortable etc. She got mad when a girl i work with got my number from a friend and asked me advice on an issue she had at work(I supervise 30 people a day and men and women ask me for advice at work). Again she got mad and threw it in my face.

Now I was getting angry cause she said it in front of her mom I think to make me feel bad. She was cheated on by her ex and I feel she brings that into what we had. When i found photos of her ex she said she had plans and that they didn't work out. I told her that that's the way life is and that she's not the only one in the world that's happened too. I feel like she's a total hypocrite and is controlling no matter who she's with.

Recently she went through my phone and found a text I sent to an old female co-worker. It was nothing sexual just a "hey how u been? hope your doing well" She got mad said she couldn't trust me and that she didn't want to date me. I tried talking to her but she wouldn't say anything to me. I was mad so I brought up stuff I repressed with us and once again she sounded like a hypocrite. Now a few days after i last seen her we talked and I told her that i wanted to work on us etc. She said no and I just said goodbye. The very next day she texted me and said that i was very special to her and that she does miss me. She also said she needed time to work on herself. i texted back that i miss her and that i'm going to work on myself. we haven't spoken since then but the one night i was drunk i texted her and said hope your doing ok and everything is well. She replied thank you and i hope your are as well with a bunch of emoji's. I didn't respond back.

Now what i need advice on is should I call her because I do miss her and i do want her back. I want to work on the problems we have because I feel she is very special. I just don't know what to do because I do care for her even though she can be jealous and somewhat controlling I just don't let her control every aspect with me. She said she didn't want me to call or text her but when i did text her the one drunken night she did respond (as previously stated earlier in this post). I feel like if she didn't want to talk to me she would of said so or told me not to bother. I'm just confused over this because I don't want to lose her and I don't want to go too long without talking that we're just strangers. I wanted to call her soon and just see how she was but i was going to make it short and sweet, but is this a good idea or should I do what I did before and not bother at all and hope she calls me?

Sorry for the long post but I had to give as many details as i could so i could get good advice. And please be brutally honest. I'd rather have that than anything. Thank you

[Mallory]

maybe she needs time cause she is not over her ex yet. And like you said she might be jealous cause her ex cheated on her and now she is suspicious with you too. The best way to fight her jealousy is if you give her a lot of attention. More than you think she needs. Whenever you think of her - let her know. Do something nice for her, compliment her. Anything that proves to her that you really like her and just have eyes for her. That is very very important if she is controlling and jealous and it will make her less jealous.

You could text her again and say something like: I just wanted to let you know that I really like you and that I want things to work but I accept if you need your time. I'll be happy to hear from you when you are ready. .. Also let her know that she is the only girl you are interested in and in case you didn't explain it to her already, let her know that the coworker is just a friend or colleague and that you are not interested in her in any other way.

I think you have nothing to loose if you say someting like this. And it will be clear that she has to make the next move.