wife on my best friends lap...

[bigteddy44]

Hey guys. I'm new to this forum but I'm in need of advice as I hope I'm just overreacting.

I just got married on saturday to a girl i've dated for a long time. I have trusted her all my life and never have any reason to think otherwise. The day after the wedding we had an after party for close friends. Ofcourse everyone was drinking a little bit and I went inside to use the bathroom. In the bathroom I hear my best friend tell my wife to come sit on his lap.. now i've known my best friend for 23 years and have no reason not to trust him either.

Obviously I don't know why he would ask her to come by him.. and yet when I came outside she was still by him... eventually I sat down like 10 minutes later next to him and she continued to sit with him for another 10 minutes. It seemed innocent.. although she was like literally sitting between his legs. I mean it's my best friend but yet I still felt uncomfortable with the fact that i'm right there and my own (wife at this point) and friend seem cool with it... and she doesn't come sit with me or leave his lap at that point.

Again she eventually got up and came by me later during the night.. but I literally just felt goofy about the situation. I don't want to bring the topic up to her or my best friend because it seems crazy to me.. but am I being crazy and overreacting or are my uncomfortable feelings about the situation normal? Please spare me some advice as I would be grateful for it. Thanks.

-Luke

[HeartWeaver]

You've to tell them that you're uncomfortable with their behaviour and to stop it immediately, and no, you're definitely not overreacting. I would get really upset if I were you too.

[Askalovegoddess]

The scenario is going to bother you unless you deal with it, and anytime those two are near each other, you are going to remember the scenario It may have been harmless and innocent but it is bothering you enough to ask about it on this forum.

You can have a non-confrontational conversation with your wife and let her know that your best friend's request was inappropriate and it made you uncomfortable that she was sitting there in between his legs. Let her know you trust her but that scenario bothered you and you wanted her to be aware. At the same token, let her know, if you have inappropriate behavior, you want her to come to you, too. Honest and open communication is a foundation for a strong marriage. As well, you may also want to mention it to your best friend and that it just felt weird and ask him not to do it again.

[goodmorning]

Easy. Next time everyone is getting together, invite your best friends girlfriend/ wife, or her best friend, or even a random hot chick to sit on your lap and see how she feels.