Any help appreciated [Relationship problem #378]

[Kasmon]

I'm getting straight to the point.

Yesterday I was in a very good mood, me and my GF had planned to meet at her place. I arrived there on my time, we hugged, we laughed, we talked about our day. We stood in the balcony gazing at people passing by, we kissed. We went inside and watched a movie. We made passionate sex as we often do.

Then after a while this dialogue happened:

Me: Did you notice my new braid? (I have somewhat long hair).
She: Yes, it's pretty nice, you made it very well.
Me: Oh, I didn't make it myself, a friend of mine did it.
She: Which friend of yours?
Me: Does it matter? BOOM! She instantly freaked out!

Then I take some time and tell her than it doesn't matter from my point of view and even if I was in her position it would still matter nothing. (That's something I believe in as a human, that this kind of behavior always works both ways to be fair.)

I also add: I know that I didn't answer your question (Which friend) but I replied sincerely that it does not matter for me and that's my opinion. But, I can see that it matters to you and I respect that. So tell me, why does it matter for you?

BOOM! ...another explosion.

After the second explosion many things went down and ugly and I remember adding:
"I did not reply the way you wanted (telling which friend) because I want to have the freedom to say things my way. Out of the box, out of the usual."

She agreed that this is my way of speaking but she cannot comprehend it. We slept together with our backs turned. Next morning I felt this dizziness you feel when you just had a fight. I felt also that she is closed up and it would be better not to hug her or try anything similar with physical contact. We talked once more and I added that we had/have (it has happened also other times) a communication problem. We said good day to each other and I left.

So what's the analysis?

P.S. If you want extra info feel free to ask me.
P.S.2 Sorry for my grammar.

[lost_man]

She thinks you had a girl braid your hair and your not saying who did it confirmed that to her. Your approach to not telling her made her feel that she can't trust you and that you are hiding things. You need to stop it, just be open and honest with her and stop hiding behind the belief that you communicate in an unusual way. If you want a life of continually being surprised by people's reactions then carry on as you are, if not then I suggest you just communicate normally and openly with them.

[Kasmon]

That's a solid point right there. Communication, for the sake of meaningfulness exchange of information, should be kept limpid and unambivalent. There are many other things to experiment and spice up to get more "color". Very helpful, thanks!

[lovebroken]

You know obviously she is a jealous and insecure girl, you replying in way you did, maybe to her even baiting her insecurity by you bringing up your braid upset her also. Does she have reasons for her jealousy or is unfounded?

[Kasmon]

Ok, lovebroken you light a different perspective of the problem that together with communication I want to amend. If I can help her get over her insecurities/jealousy. I am her second complete relationship and in her first, her ex was immensely jealous. From my side, I believe I didn't gave any right but sometimes I know I provoked her jealousy (through conversation) to make more clear what I want to fight as a couple.

[TablesandChairs]

Well, you could put it down to her insecurity but honestly, I don't know a single person who wouldn't be a little put-off by how you replied to that simple question. To a regular person with a regular style of communication - your answer seems elusive and would inspire distrust.

Your uniqueness is not measured by how absurdly you answer questions - all it does it make both yours lives harder.