To call or not to call

[Cherrytree]

Hello everyone,

about 2 months ago I met a guy who I then started seeing for about 4 weeks. During that time I was introduced to his troubled younger brother, who I got on with right away (I'm 29, he's 22).
When I stopped seeing the guy I met first (we stopped talking), the brother and I started seeing each other, so far 4 times, once he stayed at my place for 3 days.

Now I havent seen him in a week. He rarely answers my calls, seems to go offline when I say something to him on a social networking site and I'm actually scared to call now. He has a lot going on, but so do I.
He said to me once, we could never be together because of the way we met and he's hoping not to fall in love with me. I actually got a huge crush on him already and feel heart-broken, because I miss him.
Also, he talks about his ex-girlfriend a lot, who left him 1 1/2 years ago, so that's not a good sign.

What I don't understand is, he does show affection... Sometimes he kisses me out of the blue or we just look into each others eyes for minutes. He wanted me to sleep in his arms every night. He kept me up all night to talk to me on the phone last week and ended up coming to my place in the morning.
Most of the time we just talk about anything and everything or lie on the bed. We did go further than that twice (sex). Unfortunately during every visit there was some alcohol involved.

I've been battling depression for 18 years now and at the moment am having a very bad phase again, my whole life is somewhat falling apart job/apartment/friends-wise, so this matter is not really helping the situation.


Should I forget about him or call him again? I'd appreciate some male input.

P.S. His brother doesn't know any of this.

[peterwong]

Forget him. It's over.

[surfhb]

Not a good way to start a relationship. Especially when he says he's not interested in one with you

You need to work on the depression thing right now anyway. A relationship is the last thing you need

[somehelp4me]

Forget about him - you shouldn't have went for him in the first place considering he was the bro of the guy you were dating and you've both been doing this on the sly.
Move on.

[ldawg616]

As someone who suffers from severe depression I think it would be ****ing stupid to give him your heart since you are dealing with depression and if I were you I would not use and mind altering substances

[seekyourguy]

I'm with ldawg616, he doesn't sound like the sort of character who could be a positive influence to your depression at all.
And if I'm really honest, he sounds like he's playing you a little. Acts super interested to get what he wants, then goes ice cold.
I'm certain you deserve better than that. Chin up, and look for a guy who's worthy of you
-D