Got dumped out of the Blue

[DatingDistress]

My boyfriend broke up with me last night. Our relationship has been rocky the past 2 weeks: I've been going through some personal stuff and he is just about to start a new job, so there has been a distance. When confronted each other about this distance, he reassured me that everything was okay and in retrospect, he says that is how he felt at the time.

However, he called me last night and said that his heart was not in it anymore and that he wasn't ready for a relationship. FYI he is 26 and has never had a serious relationship. To me this all sounds like bullsh*t.

What hurts more than anything is that he did not have the respect to discuss this with me over the past two weeks (even though it was on his mind apparently), did not try and talk it out or give me the opportunity to open up to him.

Why do guys break up out of the blue without giving it a chance or discussing the issues?

And what do I do from here? I'm new (ish) to where I like and don't have a wide circle of friends to depend on. If I keep staying in bed crying I will go crazy.

[DatingDistress]

Anyone ?

[woody]

Dear heartbroken Lady,

Sorry you have to deal with this. May I say though, any person that breaks up with someone over the phone is a dink, for lack of some better choice words no doubt.

You need to get out of bed, stop crying and reboot your self. Consider this a dodged bullet. Your right, he did not respect you and seems to be in need of growing a spine.
Hey, who needs a mr. jello when there are plenty of strong and considerate good men out there. Right? Right.

I've said it before and I'll say it again to you, Self love lady. Self worth, confidence and power to you. Remember who you are and all you have to offer to the right person. Don't be too sad over this particular loss.

If he couldn't even talk to you in person? WEll, forget that. Why would you want to be with some one who treats you this way? I know, two sides to every story but here you are, depressed and in bed, probably not eating enough good food.
You say your new and don't have a huge group of chums. Great! Then it truly is an opportunity for a fresh start. Go find a yoga class or something else you'd like doing. Go meet some new people and be happy you got rid of any ties to this person that dissed you in an unforgivable way.
Rejoice. You are free again. Come on, get out of bed. Draw a bubble bath, cook yourself a great meal, love your home, go for a walk and look UP.

[michelle23]

Sorry you are hurting. If hes never had a serious relationship at 26 then he has some committment issues. Likely just as its getting serious, he bails. Theres plenty of emotionally healthy men around and you can do better. Heal, get over him and move on

[DatingDistress]

Thank you for your responses. They help.

[hoxtonchris]

we shouldnt presume we are the wronged ones,i too have ended a relationship over the phone,the reason was that if i waited till i saw her i would have crumbled and stayed,then all the stuff i disliked would carry on.some girls/guys dont realise they are not acting in a good way,they text rarely,they spend too much time with friends rather than us,they are cold,we hate it but they think its ok.we simply arnt compatible.end of story.find your soulmate they may be just around the corner

[milk&honey]

Keep your head up. It's hurting so much now but things will get better soon. Get out of your bed and do something, anything...

[ladyloveslosers]

Yeah I know how bad that hurts.... stay strong