Age Gap

[pseudosooz]

^^^ I disagree, tell your parents that you are dating a father figure so they can watch you like a hawk, cause when you are going out with a scumbag, you need all the guidance you can get from people who actually care about you!

^^^ I disagree. This situation will play itself out naturally. And in retrospect, when it's all said and done it will be akin to telling your parents that you're in to BDSM and really want to be somebody's sex slave. It falls in to the 'too much information category' remember, you are an adult in the eyes of the law, and a baby in your parents eyes. It's actually pretty abusive to drag them through your sexual exploration phase.

[dontaskme]

^^^ I disagree. This situation will play itself out naturally. And in retrospect, when it's all said and done it will be akin to telling your parents that you're in to BDSM and really want to be somebody's sex slave. It falls in to the 'too much information category' remember, you are an adult in the eyes of the law, and a baby in your parents eyes. It's actually pretty abusive to drag them through your sexual exploration phase.

Exactly, she is a baby in terms of experience compared to this slimy douchebag she's going out with and she's going to need the guidance of her parents to tell her if and when this douche is playing her.

When I went out with an older man, I told my parents and of course they were disappointed, but I'm glad I did because they were the oneS who opened my eyes that the guy wasn't good for me in the long term. That experience didn't change how they viewed me. They still trusted in my choices in life but they were always there to guide me when they thought I was heading through the wrong direction.

Tell your parents woman. As their daughter, you owe it to them to let them know what is going on with your life. No matter what, they will always worry about your well being. That's what parents are for but no matter what also, they will always stick up to you and love you!

And don't listen to those pricks who tell you that just because you are 24, you're not obligated to disclose to your parents anything. That maybe true when you follow the bullshit law created by cluster fukc politicians, but in your eyes, I'm sure you know what is the right thing to do.
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And who said she has to go into details about her sexual escapades?

[Wakeup]

How long have you been dating this guy?

but if you hit off it doesn't really matter. If he would have lied about anything else, I would not be even remotely interested in him anymore.

Depending on your answer to the question posed, I'd say you have no idea if he's lied about anything else yet. So.. how long?

[pseudosooz]

Exactly, she is a baby in terms of experience compared to this slimy douchebag she's going out with and she's going to need the guidance of her parents to tell her if and when this douche is playing her.

When I went out with an older man, I told my parents and of course they were disappointed, but I'm glad I did because they were the oneS who opened my eyes that the guy wasn't good for me in the long term. That experience didn't change how they viewed me. They still trusted in my choices in life but they were always there to guide me when they thought I was heading through the wrong direction.

Tell your parents woman. As their daughter, you owe it to them to let them know what is going on with your life. No matter what, they will always worry about your well being. That's what parents are for but no matter what also, they will always stick up to you and love you!

And don't listen to those pricks who tell you that just because you are 24, you're not obligated to disclose to your parents anything. That maybe true when you follow the bullshit law created by cluster fukc politicians, but in your eyes, I'm sure you know what is the right thing to do.
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And who said she has to go into details about her sexual escapades?

You're an adult and unfortunately for you, the guys you own age are usually as bad as this guy when it comes to lying about stuff and being undesirable in your parents eyes.

You do need to learn a few things, but you will.. undoubtedly.

[dontaskme]

^^^^ Let us not deviate from the topic, shall we? The douche in question here is not a a young slime but an old turd.

Regardless OP, introduce him to your parents and be honest. If this guy means well, then there's nothing he would want more than to meet your parents.

If he's playing you, then he would absolutely be scared to "meet the parents".

[Wakeup]

^^^ I disagree. This situation will play itself out naturally. And in retrospect, when it's all said and done it will be akin to telling your parents that you're in to BDSM and really want to be somebody's sex slave. It falls in to the 'too much information category' remember, you are an adult in the eyes of the law, and a baby in your parents eyes. It's actually pretty abusive to drag them through your sexual exploration phase.

lmao....

[michelle23]

This reminds me of a film I watched about a 14 year old girl being groomed for months online by a paedofile.. first he was 15, then 19, then 25 until she met him and he was actually older then her father and he raped her..

I know your not 14 but your still young, vulnerable and naive compared to him who has 20 years experience on you. Men his age who pursue women your age have issues-you could find yourself very easily being dominated, manipulated, controlled and abused. It is not rare for men like him to have narcissistic personality disorder looking for nothing more than a throphy wife..

What is wrong with you that you would even consider dating this man? Your young, beautiful, have the world at your feet. You can have ANY man you want so what is the attraction?

The fact hes already lied is a huge red flag. There are so many red flags here you should be running for the hills

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And yes your parents do need to know. Someone ALWAYS needs to know when you are with this man coz if he hurts you in some way and nobody knows where you are-that is bad news for you.

Remember you met this guy online. All you know is what he told you so if you are stupid enough to pursue this then at least try to be smart about it and protect yourself.

[lovebroken]

Too big of a age gap, imo and add that he lied to you right away about it. Neither would be pluses to me.

[reeba]

He lied to you because 'he wanted a younger woman'. Yep that totally justifies his lying (I'm being sacrastic here). Makes you wonder if he is justifying any other lies.

At least he came clean. But when you boyfriend is closer to your parents age than your age, it is just creepy.

[pseudosooz]

HELLO WESTERN CULTURE: This is me, pseudosooz, saying that you've all changed your tune in the last 100 years or so. This kind of age gap was common for millennia, back when we were selling and trading women like cattle. Now a woman has a right to choose her suitor, and if you disagree with the fact that a 24 year old woman is a woman, and would prefer to refer/think of her as a 'girl' you are just as bad if not worse, in my opinion, as the previous generations whom were just like you only the opposite extreme. The truth is that this person has been considered an adult in the eyes of the law for 6 YEARS, long enough to become a doctor in India, so I hope none of you are planning to travel to India because you may find your life in the hands of someone that you wouldn't trust to navigate their own sex life.

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I don't know about you guys but at 24 my mother had two young children, my grandmother had three young children, my great great-grandmother had more than that, the further back you go the more children they had to men they often loved less. Sabbi, get on the pill, do what makes you happy.. even if it's a mistake because age isn't a factor in how much of a mistake your boyfriends are likely to be, they're all a mistake, in their own way, until they're not. But choosing for yourself is your inalienable right, afforded to you by all the women who fought for us to be able to make a mistake here and there.. OUR OWN mistakes.. not our father's or our husbands.

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IF the above really offends you a lot, you probably wish you were born a douchebag.

[loveisathing]

Depends. If you can accept the age and the lie, fine.

I'd be wondering what else he was lying about, though.

I agree. But in reality I think it all depends on how you feel and how much trust you put into his words. Do you like him enough to date him even if your family doesn't approve?

[dontaskme]

Let me simplify this thing for you psudo because you are really going off a tangent here. The OP wants to introduce the douche to her parents but don't quite know how because of the age difference and because of the fact that the boyfriend is so close to the age of the father. Some posters, including myself said, yes, introduce him to your parents but don't lie about his age and just be upfront and truthful about it. There is nothing wrong in having her parents meet the guy in question here and for them to guide the daughter if need be unless there is something to hide.

And you can't compare your mother or grandmother to the OP because everyone is different. God bless your mother and grandmother, but this thread has got nothing to do with them!

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And no, I'm not planning to go to India ever!

[Wakeup]

HELLO WESTERN CULTURE: This is me, pseudosooz, saying that you've all changed your tune in the last 100 years or so. This kind of age gap was common for millennia, back when we were selling and trading women like cattle.

Oh, Pullleeeeeze. Back in the day (and NO not when women were being traded like cattle - this is the western world you are talking about here, (your own words) not some country that refuses to change their ways from 3,000 years ago) people were dying young in the western world ... they married young and they married a man that was established enough to look after them because ~ wait for it ~ WOMEN WERE NOT ALLOWED TO WORK other then menial jobs like taking in laundry, certainly not enough was made to support themselves.

That's not the case anymore and there is no reason for someone to be looking for a LIFE partner when they are that much older then said partner. This dude has some kind of emotional/psychological issue if he would even consider someone as a sexual/life partner who could be his daughter.

But choosing for yourself is your inalienable right, afforded to you by all the women who fought for us to be able to make a mistake here and there.. OUR OWN mistakes.. not our father's or our husbands.

Really? No, they fought for equal rights so that they could work those jobs that men were only allowed to have and, to get paid in equal amounts once they got hired to do them.

Not so that they could make stupid mistakes and have behind their parents and those who have their best interests in mind backs affairs with men old enough to be their father.

[toknow]

Oh, Pullleeeeeze. Back in the day (and NO not when women were being traded like cattle - this is the western world you are talking about here, (your own words) not some country that refuses to change their ways from 3,000 years ago) people were dying young in the western world ... they married young and they married a man that was established enough to look after them because ~ wait for it ~ WOMEN WERE NOT ALLOWED TO WORK other then menial jobs like taking in laundry, certainly not enough was made to support themselves.

That's not the case anymore and there is no reason for someone to be looking for a LIFE partner when they are that much older then said partner. This dude has some kind of emotional/psychological issue if he would even consider someone as a sexual/life partner who could be his daughter.

Really? No, they fought for equal rights so that they could work those jobs that men were only allowed to have and, to get paid in equal amounts once they got hired to do them.

Not so that they could make stupid mistakes and have behind their parents and those who have their best interests in mind backs affairs with men old enough to be their father.

So by your logic it it's ok to marry "children" because people died young then? What are you smoking, wakeup.

Do you see how ridiculous your logic is. Morality shouldn't change based on circumstance.

You need to look up the definition of a child, because you clearly don't understand it.
But, in today's society people are so oversensitive about the wrong things and paranoid, to such an extent that you can call a 24 year old person a child.

[dontaskme]

^^^ Maybe you should stop smoking weed yourself because that's not how I interpreted what wake up has said. She said back in the days, and she was referring to centuries ago, when people were dying young and were marrying young...

Those two weren't necessarily mutually exclusive, they were just facts of life then and it's not a logic of "if men died early, therefore they have to marry early".

And BTW, you're another one who's way off here. Who called the 24 y/o OP a child? It was mentioned that in comparison to the old lying douche, she is a baby and way more inexperience than him!

Get your facts straight man!

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Do you see how ridiculous your logic is. Morality shouldn't change based on circumstance.

Yeah, that's the ideal for you, is it realistic? Nah! You need to get on with the modern times!

You know how many people would kill someone because they are starving? Is it moral, no, but they do it because of the circumstances of how they were brought into this world.