Is it normal? Should I initiate contact now? Need help!

[Wakeup]

Actions tell the story more so than words. Just keep doing what you are doing and his actions will tell you whether or not he is worth your time.

His actions are already telling you that he's not into you. He's keeping you hooked until you're desperate and then he'll easily play you right into bed out of desperation of not winning him over (by playing hard to get).

His action are clearly telling you that he's not as into you as you'd hoped he'd be and if he's used to being with many partners then he's not worried about losing you because they are many more where you came from.

[Lilia]

His actions are already telling you that he's not into you. He's keeping you hooked until you're desperate and then he'll easily play you right into bed out of desperation of not winning him over (by playing hard to get).

His action are clearly telling you that he's not as into you as you'd hoped he'd be and if he's used to being with many partners then he's not worried about losing you because they are many more where you came from.

I already decided for myself that I won't sleep with him. My rule is dating at least 2 months and getting engaged in different activities , meeting each other's friends and family members. And I made it very very clear for him that I'm not that type of a girl and that if he is just looking for a girl to lay with , this is not going to be me. I also agreed to go on a date with him only if he acts like a chivalrous gentleman with me which he did. He also told me that he is looking for something real and that we'll wait until we are both ready before sex. But he was giving mixed signals also cos he suggested that I'd come over to his place to watch a movie and he said we'd only kiss but I said "no I'm a lady and I don't like things to be rushed." and he accepted it.
What else can I say.. I've met about 20 guys over last year and had dates with them ,I dated about 10 guys over last year too (but we didn't' have sex) And this guy is the first confident guy I've met in a year. Cos others would take anything from me and I wasn't even attracted to them.
And this guy is so calm and relaxed all the time. So confident. And he went for a kiss on the first date and it felt great.
Also this guy could walk into any bar and pick the prettiest girl any time so why is he wasting his time with me? Just cos he likes a challenge once in a while I assume?

[Wakeup]

I already decided for myself that I won't sleep with him. My rule is dating at least 2 months and getting engaged in different activities , meeting each other's friends and family members. And I made it very very clear for him that I'm not that type of a girl and that if he is just looking for a girl to lay with , this is not going to be me. I also agreed to go on a date with him only if he acts like a chivalrous gentleman with me which he did. He also told me that he is looking for something real and that we'll wait until we are both ready before sex. But he was giving mixed signals also cos he suggested that I'd come over to his place to watch a movie and he said we'd only kiss but I said "no I'm a lady and I don't like things to be rushed." and he accepted it.
What else can I say.. I've met about 20 guys over last year and had dates with them ,I dated about 10 guys over last year too (but we didn't' have sex) And this guy is the first confident guy I've met in a year. Cos others would take anything from me and I wasn't even attracted to them.
And this guy is so calm and relaxed all the time. So confident. And he went for a kiss on the first date and it felt great.
Also this guy could walk into any bar and pick the prettiest girl any time so why is he wasting his time with me? Just cos he likes a challenge once in a while I assume?

Like I said...he's playing you. The only challenge you are is that you've told him you won't sleep with him and now he's making you crazy to the point that when you do see him again, you'll be more willing to sleep with him thinking that it will win you a relationship with him.

Quit trying to play a player. Its hard enough for the most experienced, confident people to play a player and you're neither of those two things.

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We couldn't go on several dates cos he lives in another country.
And he has business trips to my country once/twice a month.

How do you know he's not married or in another relationship where he lives and that's why he didn't return your contact on the night before your date?

Never mind any conjecture... this guy doesn't have time for you and you'd NEVER ever trust him when he wasn't with you if you do form some kind of relationship with him.

Why are you trying so hard with a man that you'll rarely see, who you won't trust and who hasn't shown you in the least that he's really into you? WHY?

[Lilia]

Wakeup, thank you very much for your opinion.
You are right, I am very vulnerable and I get attached quickly…
May be one day I'll become very confident and I'll be able to play a player.
Then I'll be satisfied.

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I don't think that I am trying so hard.
As I said I've never contacted him first in 2 months.
He always contacted me.
And I wasn't that emotionally involved with him before we kissed.
Also he told me that he's thinking of moving to my country.

[rest77]

Wakeup is right!

[Lilia]

He hasn't messaged me for almost a week.
I am just thinking what was the point of texting me that night "hey" if he wasn't going to start a conversation.
Is it his revenge cos I waited 2 hours before replying? Is it such a crime?
Or he decided to put me aside cos he thought I was playing hard to get… and he wasn't that into me.
I just hate seeing him on line on Skype and not bothering to text me after it's been almost a week since I replied to his "hey" message.
I know I shouldn't care so much about this guy. But I am just so so so tired of never meeting guys that I am attracted to. All year - never met a single guy I wanted. And guys come up to me all the time. It is so frustrating. I just feel that it is going to take a whole year again until I meet someone I finally find attractive. Sounds stupid, "first world problems" kind of thing but this is a big problem for me cos I've been single for long, nobody kissed me in a year, nobody hugged me in a year. No affection, no touch, no caress , so of course I am going crazy now.

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I just want to add something to my post.
There was another guy that I met on line too and and we had sexual chats, long story short -he has my nudes (without my face though) and he found out the new guy's Skype id. He threaded to send him my pics and some of our chats print screens.
There's no real proof though that he really knows his Skype id.
But I am thinking now what if he texted him and sent him my nudes and that's why the guy stopped contacting me.
Also he added me about 2 days ago again and asked how my relationship with that guy was going.

[Wakeup]

Are you for real?

[TheEvilJester]

It is definitely sounding more and more like he isn't interested, Lilia. And let me apologize on his behalf that he cannot just man up and let you off the hook. I know how much it can suck to torture yourself with all that stuff. "Does this person like me?" "Are they ignoring me, or am I just being paranoid?" It becomes Hell because one part of you feels like they don't give a crap about you, so in part you want to call them out and/or give up on them. Yet, another part of you tells you that you are probably just being paranoid, and that you like this person so you don't WANT to give up on them. It sucks.

But, it's been weeks and he hasn't bothered to contact you. If this is supposed to be your boyfriend, or somebody who could be your boyfriend, then that is certainly not acceptable. Especially considering you mentioned that you guys are long distance. That makes it even more important to keep in touch more regularly, because you don't get a chance that often to see each other.

I also know how much it can suck wanting to connect with somebody but feeling like it will never happen. Trust me, though. I know it is hard to realize this sometimes, but you really are much better off by yourself then you are with somebody who doesn't treat you the way you deserve, or who just makes you feel unappreciated. Some day you will find the guy who will treat you like a priority, and not an option. Don't settle for a loser just because you haven't found him yet. And, heck, maybe it will even turn out that this guy IS that guy who will appreciate you. Maybe he has just been crazy busy and will have a great, understandable excuse. It just seems less and less likely. You know what they say. People will make time for those for whom they wish to make time. Good luck, my friend.