Sex life issues

[Saga]

Hello everyone,

I've been with my boyfriend for a little over a year. We are both in our 20's. Things have been up and down, but one of the biggest "downs" is our sex life. For one, I am a virgin (vaginal intercourse only). I am more than eager to lose my virginity at this point though. My boyfriend (not a virgin) wants us both to be ready before we have sex. Therefore, the only thing that works for him besides actual sex is blow jobs. I pretty much hate giving them, but I do it sometimes because it's all he wants. I tried it with a condom but he didn't like how it felt. Anyway, he gets angry with me because I don't bring up being sexual more than once a week or so, but why would I if my only option is to put his cock in my mouth? He says every other girl he's dated had no problem giving oral. I've told him that I just want to have regular sex sometimes to switch things up and to be able to do something more intimate, but he doesn't want to take my virginity just because I hate blow jobs and until things overall are better between us. We tend to argue a lot, but we both care for each other a lot. I think it's commendable that he cares about my virginity, but at the same time I just want to have sex! Haha. Am I being selfish? Should I just give him oral more often even though I hate it? Or should he be more understanding?

[purple_roses]

Oh my goodness. This guy is so rude. To only expect pleasure for himself and never give it. That's so disrespectful. He's just using you for blowjobs. Hes probably used to other girls not wanting to do it for him all the time, so now he's found a girl that he can bully into doing it by saying he'll have actual sex with you someday. You could find a guy so much more loving and cares way more about your pleasure and needs then this guy.

[katyk]

Ditto that reply! Assuming there are no religious or medical issues here this guy is taking the p***! So all these other girls who had no problem giving oral? Where are they now? He's had sex you say and he either got told he was useless and he may be covering insecurities or decided he prefers the laid back, lazy option of a blow job then? When does he think you might BOTH be ready? You could be in for a long wait! He either needs to be entirely honest about why he doesn't want sex with your or you should consider refusing blow jobs? But for goodness sake don't be blackmailed or bullied into anything! Its not a one way street!

[michelle23]

I think your with the wrong guy. You argue a lot, your sex life is crap and your together a year but he refuses to sleep with you.. seriously? Does he also give you oral? Or is it always all about him?

[belltops]

err..guys have issues with virginity.

Trust me, it is a guy thing. It would be easier to take a girl's virginity if both of you are married, but there is this thing about breaking that hymen that is just too much to handle for a guy.

Never have, and never will.....except she is my wife

[Azwraith]

Oh my goodness. This guy is so rude. To only expect pleasure for himself and never give it. That's so disrespectful. He's just using you for blowjobs. Hes probably used to other girls not wanting to do it for him all the time, so now he's found a girl that he can bully into doing it by saying he'll have actual sex with you someday. You could find a guy so much more loving and cares way more about your pleasure and needs then this guy.

+1

You should find someone that wants to please you at first place, not to please himself.
Does he give you blowjob, as Michele asked?
There is nothing wrong with NOT liking to give a blowjob. I am a male, and if I were a female I would never do it. It is just gross. I don't even mind girls doing it to me, its more gross than a turn on.

[Wakeup]

Op: Are you saying he doesn't even reciprocate and give you head (or face) too? Why would you be so lacking in self-worth that you blow him while he does NOTHING for you? Or am I not reading your post correctly and he does actually give YOU ORAL as well?

[CrasherRob8]

I think he is using the cover of your virginity to force you to keep giving him blowjobs. Has he eaten you out? If not tell him you'll give him a blowjob if he eats you out. If not then no blowjob.

My girlfriend doesn't like giving blowjobs either. They feel great but I rarely even proposition it. She'll do it but to me it's pretty gross. But then again I wouldn't hesitate to eat her out

[Vinya S]

Just give him head more often. Then you can stay a Virgin forever, but develop jaw problems that may eventually lead to clamping down and biting it off. Problem solved.


Seriously though, what everyone else said is pretty accurate. Men need to get off, but your hand or vagina should be able to do that too. Or even your butt. Whatever you are in to.

Don't cut off the blowies... but don't let that be all you do.