Relationship is facing hard time..

[kalabok123]

Hi everyone! First time here haha. So I'm facing hard times in my relationship. I met this really nice girl at my previous job, we talked there for the first time, started seeing each other and finally get together. Our relationship isn't lasting very long but there is a feeling in my guts that it could be a nice longlasting relationship. The thing is that she lost her job and has now returned to her birth town. Oh, I forget to mention, that she is a student and this year it's her final year and she's writing final work for university right now. The only thing that held her in this city, was her job because only with it she was able to keep the apartment. I never had a long distance relationship so I'm a little worried about how it is going to affect us in the future. The distance isn't that big, so we're going to see each other quite often. I think the problem is within me, I'm thinking way too far in the future than I should, but can't help it. My thoughts are something like that: "We will see each other every week and there is no problem with that, but what will it to be further? We won't be able to be satisfied with that kind of relationship forever", "What if she isn't going to go back to city where I'm now. Would it be ok for me to move somewhere near her", "What if she is going to stay in her birth town? It's small town, there is no opportunities for healthy relationship, fun things to do, even for carrier..." And so on. I know, it's stupid things to thought and it's not the end of the world, but can't help it haha. Maybe some of you was facing that kind of situations and maybe you could share your thoughts about it?

[woody]

WEll that's a tough one. Distance. hm. Some people can make this work, others find it too much to bare.
Over thinking won't help either so try to stop that. Just take things naturally, slow and steady. She's not finished school yet and her options must remain open as far as where she'll move to afterwards.
Often, both people will move to a brand new City or town to begin their lives together.
Just enjoy the time you two do have, keep it real, keep the romance and take things in stride. Don't overlap all the what if's as it will weigh both of you down.
Prioritize. Can't do any big moves until she's out of University anyway right?

[kalabok123]

Woody, thanks for your quick respond!
I think of myself as a person who could make long distance relationship work. At times I'm really motivated and thinking that I could move mountains haha. I already have plans and thoughts about how to make it happen. In my country there is a saying "I'm planning and God is laughing" so I think it's kinda not worth to think that far in the future.
I know that I'm over thinking. That is one of my biggest problems, but I'm not able to make it through.
When I'm with her, I'm not thinking at all, my brains shut down and I'm just happy idiot haha. I really enjoy the time being with her and I know that she enjoys it too. That's what keeps my mind together.
Yeah, you're right, first thing's first. She'll finish the university and then we will see what will happen.

[woody]

That's right man. And hey, btw, a good sign you become as you say, a happy idiot when your around her. Sounds like you got some great chemistry there.
Well wishes for you and yours and yes, one step at a time.

Just enjoy each other and do what comes naturally.
Be thankful you even found each other. good luck man

[kalabok123]

Thanks, Woody! I'll try to work with my over thinking. Maybe you have some kind of information (books, videos, audio) about it? I've been interest in that kind of things for a while now and it would be really helpful to get a little more of information.

[woody]

Well, I'm sorry to say I haven't allot of info as far as books or video go pertaining to over thinking but I'll give you what works for me. Yoga. I know, laugh if you must but the stuff really works. Through stretching and relaxing the body, the mind follows and man, it does work. I'd suggest something basic. Start with some Sun Salutations; you can google allot of templates but i'd suggest a beginner class with an instructor that offers allot of modifications and doesn't push his/her students into anything their not comfy with. If they do 'push' find another instructor.
seriously, give it a try. It could change your life and hey, it feels great so why not right?

maybe there are some others here that could suggest some books for you?
Anyone got any methods they could share?

anyway, good luck and remember, just breath deep

[kalabok123]

Thanks for a sugestion, I'll think about it. I've tried a little bit of meditation, but it's not that easy as I thought at the begining haha. It's actually pretty hard to shutdown your mind.

[moneyspills]

Often, both people will move to a brand new City or town to begin their lives together. Just enjoy the time you two do have, keep it real, keep the romance and take things in stride. Don't overlap all the what if's as it will weigh both of you down. Prioritize.






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