Please help, I'm so torn.

[Martyna1]

So torn.....my daughters father and I have been together for 7 years. I was 16 when we met. I got pregnant at 20 and we moved into his parents houseb(basement) it was horrible experience...didn't have anything of my own and his parents were overstepping boundaries with my daughter. I actually fell into depression. I tried to talk to her father about my issues and if we could please move out it was already 4 years and he got comfortable and didn't want to move. Then emotional abuse started and he said if I'm not happy I should leave the last two years were hell no communication sex life was downhill he made me feel like his maid and that's it. So I finally packed my bags and lefts and started talking to a wonderful man now my daughters father wants to try to make things work again..says he will change. He supported me financially when I moved out spoiled me with gifts nice dinners, never once raised his voice at me was perfect guy but deep down I don't feel the connection and I think it's because of how emotionally hurt I was. He tells me I am his soulmate and he wants to give us another try and that he doesn't want anyone else but me . What is a girl to do?

[relationship55]

Maybe packing your things and leaving showed him what he missed out on. Not many people value their partner because they don' expect them to leave. But once they leave, then they realize what they missed out on. I would hear him out at least.

[Martyna1]

Do you think it's worth another try? And if I am his soul mate and the one for him why did he start to emotionally abuse me for years?

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Do you think it's worth another try? And if I am his soul mate and the one for him why did he start to emotionally abuse me for years? Yelling at me in front of baby making me feel like crap

[relationship55]

I didn't mean to give him another chance (but that's up to you if you feel like he is being genuine), but I would listen to him and his whole thought process. Also, let him know how much he hurt you because it is healthy to discuss it.

[Martyna1]

Yes but it seems like it might be a little too much too late. He might be acting genuine but how can I really be sure and go back and the abuse starts again. I told him how hurt I was and he says to let past go..

[relationship55]

I wish I could answer that question for you, I really do! But that's up to your judgement

[Wakeup]

If the other guy wasn't in the picture would you want to be with "your daughter's father" (funny that you don't even call him your boyfriend/spouse/SO or Ex.)

Is your D's F willing to move out of the depressing basement and find his family their own home?

Is he willing to keep going on date nights with you and courting you instead of taking you for granted once you're back?

Just Some things to consider ^^^

BTW: Did you bring your daughter with you when you packed your bags and left? Its unclear.

[woody]

Listen to your inner gut. Drown out all the other voices of things said, doubts imposed, dreams that haven't quite reached fruition and listen. Open your hearts ears and follow that.

Only you are gonna know which way to go here. Have you been happy living separately from the ex husband? sounds like it. Enjoyed talking to a nice man who is kind to you?

Your ex husband might be sensing your moving on and forgetting about him; hence the efforts on his part to convince you he's a changed man. Wow, just like that eh? It's a f_-ing miracle.. Hey, is he still living in his parents basement?
Yeah, big changes indeed.
Follow your gut instincts. teach your kids how a proud and good woman handles situations like this because their watching to see what Mummy does. Don't let them assume we tolerate crappy behavior because one day, they'll be seeking out their own future mates.