Wife wants divorce no reason?

[Johnburns88]

My wife left me about close to 1 month ago. She will not give me a reason. We have honestly had a very good relationship. I still love her to death, we never went through a rough patch and she decided to tell me that she wants a divorce and left the house to stay with a girl friend that she has known since very young. I live in Ohio and she wants to get a disillusion in which we both have to agree. I have no answers as to why and I have done a lot of research that truly suggests that she is not involved with anyone else. My question at this point is what should I do in this situation. I feel like I should not agree to the disillusion, she does not want to take anything so I am not worried about material objects in anyway. I made my vows to her and I meant them. She is not willing to see a counselor with me. I DO NOT want this. Is it worth it to go through an actual divorce with her? I am doing all I can to save the marriage but I feel like I have not made any progress. does anyone have any ideas or opinions on this? What would the courts do or say in this situation. She honestly has nothing bad to say about me. I'm lost and I just want to try and work things out. The night before we watched a movie together.. cuddled and even made love.. This makes no sense to me. She woke up and wanted to leave me? Nothing slowed down and we both truly seemed happy but she wants to rush this and have me agree on things I don't want...

[Nicky210473]

This doesn't happen for 'no reason' it's just that you don't know about it. Something else is going on. She may not be seeing anyone.. Yet. It could be that she wants to start a new life, you'll probably find her going out and socialising a lot more. She may have felt trapped. That doesn't mean you've done anything wrong. She sounds like she has a problem communicating and telling you what she wants and what's wrong. This is my honest answer and I hope you're being honest when you say she hasn't a bad thing to say about you bc if you're abusive and controlling then chances are she can't tell you that and she just left.

[Johnburns88]

I'm being 100% honest. I just don't know what to do at this point. She knows that she can tell me anything and I would never do anything to harm her under any circumstance. I love my wife. I just wish I could figure things out. I really don't know what to do.

[Nicky210473]

I do feel for you. It's very cold what she's done. I couldn't leave someone hanging like that. I have a feeling there's something else going on with her and still think she wants to start a new life. You'll be ok, I know it's heartbreaking but seriously you can't make someone stay. I know she's your wife but you don't deserve that. You're better off without her if she's so unstable and she can walk off like that with absolutely no explaination x

[dontaskme]

Dissolution of marriage is a more cost effective way for you and your spouse to terminate your marriage without having a need to hire an attorney to do the work for you.

It seem to me that your wife has made up her mind and totally wants out. Whatever the reason is, you should give her her freedom. If you don't, and try to fight this, she will feel bitterness and/or even animosity towards you.

Not giving her what she wants would not stop her from filing a divorce, which would only cost both of you more financially towards the end. Ohio is amongst the few States that still require grounds for divorce. All she needs is to have one and she can legally file for the divorce. At this point, you're only delaying what appears to be inevitable.

For your own closure, I suggest to speak to her one more time and ask her to be fair and honest with you why she wants to dissolve your Union, then you'll grant her what she's asking of you.

[woody]

yah, ouch. I'll Start by saying I'm sorry your getting your heart ripped out. Can't imagine dealing with something like this without reason and the lack of closure would be torturous. Are you sure she didn't drop any hints at all over this past chunk of time?
I don't know what to say to you. I mean, sure, you could try getting some valid reasons from her, try talking it through but if she's made up her mind which it seems she has, it then becomes a beast of burden on you.

She owes you an explanation. To just up and leave like that is one cold fish move i.m.o and highly unfair to you; and though I know there are always two sides to a story, leaving you like that without rhyme or rhythm brings forth a risk of you losing a piece of your self so watch out for that. If she can't respect the need for closure and offer you reasons why, it's going to be up to you and it'll be one of the toughest things you'll do.
If I may offer anything here it is this; what she has done is on her, not you, her. Sure, no one's perfect, we all mess up now and then but to just leave a marriage cold turkey without word as to why; well, she did that, not you.
Be mindful to NOT allow her actions to bring forth self doubts of your character or worth towards your self. Am I making any sense? idk.

Protect yourself. This is going to be rough on your heart but you will get through this.

[Johnburns88]

I really do appreciate and understand what everyone is saying. In my mind right now I know she is not coming back. I don't know what's happening. At this point I will sign the paper for her to move forward I love her more than enough to do that. The only thing I truly need to know right now is that I have done everything I could to try and mend the situation. How should I act towards her to possibly figure things out and maybe get that small chance even 1% of fixing things... 1 is better than 0. I have been very civil towards her other than crying which I have really tried not to do when I talk to her but seems impossible. I know its hard with no one knowing why she is doing this, but in that situation the way I act and the way I carry myself I believe could make a difference in someway. I just want to know the best way I can act... distant.. close... loving.. cold... No matter what I'm hurt more than I have ever been in my life. More than watching my own mother die, but do I show her that or just give distance and try and act like its not hurting.

- - - Updated - - -

I have gone through my head over and over again. I don't really have any hints of anything. The only time she has told me she wasn't happy is when she was going through school and still having to work part time. She had made it very clear that school and work were the cause of her unhappiness and told me she didn't know how she could do it without me and told me I have been very supportive to get her through it all. She has been done with school for a while now.

[woody]

Yeah man, sometimes these things just happen; but it is a new year. You must move forward, onward and upward as they say.
I hope your doing alright...