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Thread: chew me up or spit me out!

  1. #1
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    chew me up or spit me out!

    i've never posted on here but have been reading others ppl's posts for the last few months and its really been a place of comfort.......

    I can't really say when i broke up with my ex, that along with so many other things hasn't exactly been very clear....

    to make a long story very short my ex cheated on me, he came home for the summer and we ended up spending the whole summer being together while he was still w/the girl he basically left me for......he gave me a reason of why he couldn't break up with her (that i believed at the time), but thinking back on it now i really didn't care what the reason was...as long as what was happening could take away some of the betrayal and rejection i was happy.
    But eventually that wasn't enough to keep me happy, i need to be acknowledged as more then late night booty calls.
    His grandma got became very ill and passed away shortly after, they were really close and i tried not to put anymore pressure on him........

    i tried giving him space but he still wanted me there, and he still wanted the other girl there, i couldn't deal with it without flipping out at him everytime we saw one another....he started getting frustrated with me, every time i was upset he would just run to her, it feels like he was choosing her b/c she was happy all the time, she didn't give him shit all the time, it feels like he made a decision about who to be with when i wasn't able to be myself, she never knew about us, she could just be a source of comfort........
    he keeps coming into my life when he thinks i've completly left to say he misses me and wants to be with me then when he has me he's confused.

    i told him i couldn't do it anymore, i did the no contact thing for almost 2 months, i unblocked him for some reason and he would msg me everytime i came online, then i realized this was soo stupid, things aren't different.... i sent him an email saying 'when i go to school i'm blocking and deleting you, and this time i really think we need to stay away from each other'............he wrote back saying i hope everything is going well and i think thats a good idea........this was a very short version

    i know it should have ended a long time ago, i know i don't want this anymore, i shouldn't even give him any of of my time b/c of how he's treated me, but it just hurt so much to read that, its just so sad to know its really over, its just so sad to know you could be with someone for 5 years and they could keep putting someone else's needs ahead of all of yours evn tho. they keep claiming they'll never love anyone the way they love you, its so sad that you could give someone all of yourself and wait patiently for them and then they could just turn around and give themselves so freely to someone else...EVERYTHING you have waited for, its so sad that i can't just hate him or dislike him after all this, its so sad that i have to send him emails saying i'm sorry you had to go through this, its so sad that when he calls me i have the need to comfort him, i feel more rejected, betrayed, and worthless then i did at the start of all this....its so sad that this betrayal and rejection had to come from the one person i loved the most...and sorry for writting its 'so sad' so many times, and the weird subject line its late!
    Last edited by *konstantine*; 02-09-05 at 03:16 PM.

  2. #2
    Ellynn's Avatar
    Ellynn is offline Love Gurus
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    Understandable when you are feeling hurt. You don't even know how to feel.....you just feel sad.....

    5 years is a long time.....but he cheated on you and why should you be put second to some other girl?

    Honestly I wish I could say something to cheer you up.......but I know its probably impossible.

    The best thing you can do is to continue avoiding him and move on with your life. You have to start somewhere right? Time will help..... IN time you will feel back to normal and begin to appreciate being free from all that drama.....and know that you did the right thing by letting go....

    Also there are other men out there that WILL give you the respect you deserve. You DO deserve it....and don't let anyone tell you different...
    Appreciate the good times and learn from the bad times....


  3. #3
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    Always leave it to Ellynn to give the down to earth advice.
    "Why are you an atheist?"
    "because I paid attention in science class."

  4. #4
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    Hi *konstantine*

    I think you should have given him the boot the second you found out about the other girl. Noone deserves a treatment like that and noone deserves a treatment you have been subjected to. Keep him out of your life and look for someone better. I find for me, nothing works better to make me move on than starting to date again (But i might be an exception to a normal person stereotype)

    I find watching comedy, going to live shows and exercising helps me get my mind of things. Hope it works for you as well. Good Luck!!!
    Don't cry, don't regret and don't blame
    Weak find the whip, willing find freedom
    Towards the sun, carry your name
    In warm hands you are given
    Ask the wind for the way
    Uncertainty's gone, your path will unravel
    Accept all as it is and do not blame
    God or the Devil
    ~Born to Live - Mavrik~

  5. #5
    Tone's Avatar
    Tone Guest
    Seriously, keep this jerkoff out your life. You haven't known anything else but him for the last 5 years, but trust me when I say this guy is a scumbag. A total scumbag. There are guys out there that will NOT cheat on you, and will respect you enough to treat you good and not hurt you.

    The sooner you get rid of this jerkoff for good, the sooner you can move on and be happy and meet someone who is gonna make you feel a gazillion times better than Captain ****stick here.

  6. #6
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tone
    Seriously, keep this jerkoff out your life. You haven't known anything else but him for the last 5 years, but trust me when I say this guy is a scumbag. A total scumbag. There are guys out there that will NOT cheat on you, and will respect you enough to treat you good and not hurt you.

    The sooner you get rid of this jerkoff for good, the sooner you can move on and be happy and meet someone who is gonna make you feel a gazillion times better than Captain ****stick here.
    i agree with Tone , just give him closure and move on . Good luck with your next find .

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