My girlfriend doesn't want to kiss me anymore

[KyleJenkins]

Hello. My name is Kyle and I'm 24 years old, my girlfriend is 21. I want to explain first of all that I come from a religious family and I am myself, and I intend to stay a virgin until marriage. My girlfriend knows this and though she does not agree with my views, she accepted it and decided she was gonna wait for me.

We do some things, like kissing and caressing each other and cuddling. We are very touchy-feely, and she has been the first woman I do this with. She always took it slow and asking me if I'm comfortable, something I strongly value and love about her. We usually cuddle every night, after watching some movie or reading something together or playing games. We have a great relationship, and I feel very happy with it.

The problem started when one night about a month ago, I felt a bit uncomfortable with the sexual activity we were having and she noticed and asked me. I admit I haven't been fair to her and haven't explained my limits clearly, and she seemed a bit upset with that. She immediately stepped back and apologized, she didn't treat me bad at all and she was understanding but she told me we better calm down for a while.

The thing is, I didn't expect this while to be so long. She has been avoiding my kisses for over a month and we only hug, basically. We don't even cuddle anymore. When I ask her the reason why, she tells me she doesn't want us to get horny and it to lead somewhere else. I have told her I am comfortable with kissing and hugging but it hasn't changed anything.

I admit our kisses are usually hot. She makes this little noises and sighs and it's like she knows where to touch, and I almost always have an erection. We have grinded against each other and she gave me a handjob once (I asked her), but I felt torn between the guilt and the desire after that happened.

The rest of our relationship is alright. She acts just like before, very loving. She recently gave me a beautiful anticipated Valentine's Day present that she put a lot of effort on. But the problem is I miss her kisses. I miss touching and cuddling her and everytime I see her I have a hard time controlling myself.

I have tried a couple of times to seach for her mouth but she moves away every time. I'm just scared I've ruined our relationship, that she will get tired of me and having to wait. I feel like I always tell her to stop and she has been nothing but understanding to me. She has told me I have the right to tell her no and that I don't owe her anything, but it doesn't make it better.

I love her, and I miss her kisses. But at the same time I feel in no position to request anything, since she is waiting for me. I don't know what to do, and I would really appreciate advice.

[ivey444]

Sex is one of the most important things in a healthy relationship, I couldn't imagine a relationship working without it so she must be very into you if she can wait and doesn't share the same views.
If your "views" allowed you to receive a handjob, why would it be worse if this escalated again or things went further? Surely you have already "committed a sin" to your views which are crazy in my eyes for such a natural thing like sex. Are the views you have already broken more important than the relationship if you feel it drifting away?

Surely it will be best to tell her that you miss kissing her etc as well