He said he is Selfish

[msbebe25]

So, me and my bf have been dating for 6 months already. I have met his friends and he have met mine during the course of our relationship. We both posted pictures of each other through social media. He got invited to his friend's wedding next month. I asked him if he wanted me be his date. He said he wants to go alone because he is selfish and just wants to spend some time with his friend at their wedding. Should I overreact to this or just take it as him bonding with his friend, since they rarely see each other nowadays due to their crazy schedules?

[basilandthyme]

You take it however you take it. If you're hurt at his actions, then tell him. If you're cool at him attending events without you, then be happy for him.

[TheEvilJester]

You know, I'm not sure how I feel about this one. Quick question. Do you know if you were specifically invited? Weddings can be expensive, and as part of controlling the cost, sometimes people have to be a little bit selective as to who is invited. If his friend didn't necessarily know you that well, it may be possible that he just invited your boyfriend, and not you directly or any "plus one." Maybe your boyfriend didn't want you to be upset with his friend, so he said this thinking he'd blame himself instead.

Or, it is possible he actually does just want to go by himself. If that is the case, then I'm not really entirely sure how I feel about that. It seems a little weird to me on the surface. Why wouldn't he want to bring you along? It isn't like you'd get in the way of him being there for his friend, especially since his friend should be spending time with everybody at the wedding and not just him. So, I don't see why it would be a problem for you to be there, and I would personally think he should want you to be with him.

Though, at the same time I'm not sure if it is a reason to be upset. I mean, I could think of a few reasons why I would specifically not like the idea if I were you, but I don't want to just needlessly add paranoid thoughts into your head. LOL! So, yeah, bit of a strange one.

I think I have to go with basil on this one. I think however it hits you is how it hits you. I think you have a right to feel whatever way it is you happen to feel about it. If it bugs you, maybe talk to him about it. I wouldn't say you intend to pick a fight about it, but just open it up as a discussion. Maybe he actually has legit reasons he can explain that will make you feel okay about it. I can't really think of a good reason why you wouldn't want your significant other with you other than if you weren't invited as part of trying to keep the list under control (the only ones I can think of are not very flattering), but maybe that is just because I'm not in the situation.

[jenniferaniston]

Give him some space and let him enjoy with his friends

[Wakeup]

I'd say that he's not as invested in you as you are invested in him at this point in your six month union.

Make plans to go out with your girl friends doing something fun out on the town that night. Whatever the fk you do, don't sit at home worrying about what he's doing or pining away for him like some dejected has been.

You're young and you've only been going out with him for six months. Do NOT give up your own interests for him or any other man and if you don't have any friends to go out with then you best get some because you need to be a happy chica with a full life outside of your romantic one in order to keep your ying balanced with your yang.

[TheEvilJester]

Yeah, I mean, I hate to be cynical, but I do think I'd agree. That would personally be my initial thought as well. As Wakeup says, it would kind of make me think he was less invested as well. I mean, I think 6 months is long enough to consider you his steady girlfriend. So, I don't get why he wouldn't want you to come with him. Again, though, maybe he has his reasons, and I suppose it is possible they are completely innocent. If it truly bothers you, talk to him about it.

All the same, I agree with Wakeup's advice. Use it as an excuse to take a day to do you. Hang out with friends, or do some hobby you may have, or whatever you would want to do for yourself if it were any random day where you just had the whole day to yourself.

Furthermore, if he's not as invested in you as you are in him, that will become more and more obvious over time, and should be your excuse to move on. If you need more and it seems he doesn't, then that is fine for him, but you should go find somebody who will more so align with you. Of course, we may be jumping the gun. Only you would really know. Good luck to you either way.

[woody]

ya, they got it. ^^^^ said it all..
Make some fun plans and go do it..

Hey, maybe your new bo is right. He's selfish. Least he's straight up over it.

6 months is the whirlwind stage; could simply be this is an old mate of his, he just wants to go solo to kick it old school, no ties, no questions, keeps you safe behind the lines. You'll find out more in the coming months.