Is there a chance of us getting back together??

[Tunafish]

We were together from December until May, but for the last two months of the relationship he wasnt happy. The reason being an incident which was my fault, no infedelity, after that he saw me as a different person, and I tried my hardest for weeks to convince otherwise, and said he would give me another chance. I took this as a chance to try to get him to love me again, but instead I smothered him, admittedly he has trouble sharing and communicating with me what he wants or how he feels as this is both of our first serious relationships, so we are still learning, but because of that I didn't notice what I was doing until he tried to break up with me a few days before we actually broke up. A few days to look back on what happened, and realise I had become dependent on him, I had become a loser and neglected my friends, hobbies and myself. I explained this all to him but he just wanted to give up, and so he broke it off.

We texted straight after in a civil, almost friendly, manner, he mentioned he loved me once and of course he would want that feeling again but doesn't see it happening. I may be wrong but I think it's because I'm not the person he fell in love with anymore, even I agree with him. So I picked my stuff up the day after, and explained that I wasn't as upset as I thought I was because I had realised I was too dependent on him, wanting someone there, not specifically him. I know so many people say never to be friends with an ex as it is too painful, but we are on the same page, knowing that we are both no longer in love but do miss the time that we were. So I asked him for time for me to find myself again but to not lose touch, and I'm already getting there within a few days, being happy with myself and with my friends again. I'm meeting with him this weekend, however I don't know whether that is a good idea because even though there's no love it may hinder our chances of missing each other and any prospect of a relationship. The problem is we only have six weeks left because it is his last year at uni, and I don't think that's enough time for the whole no contact rule, so my question is what the hell do I do?! I admit I'm not in love with him anymore but I still want to be with him, so maybe one day we can have that amazing relationship we once had.

[basilandthyme]

Tunafish, he no longer loves you and you no longer love him. You're not going to miss each other and get back together - instead you're both going to move on with life and find new love elsewhere.

"No Contact" doesn't need to be done in a literal sense. Yes, you may see each other around and you can nod and smile. Even say "good morning". No Contact is more about stopping the intense contact which is had while in the relationship.

[fukushima123]

It sounds like you just have trouble letting go.
It was a fire that burned out quickly.

In my opinion I don't think it was entirely your fault in terms of "turned into a loser" by neglecting your friends and smothering him etc.
People do funny things when they fall in love, and if it were the right guy, he might have seen it as a period of adjustment.
The fact that he was repelled by your weakness shows he isn't mature enough to handle you.
Love is a growth process and if it he was right for you, he would have had the patience and insight to appreciate you at the worst of times.
Six months is enough time for two people to decide whether it's right or not.

In the meantime maybe it's good to reflect on whether you were taking all the blame when maybe he just wasn't the type of supportive guy that you needed to begin with.
If he just needs to grow up, only one person trying to change themself won't help him.
Sometimes finding yourself becoming needy is a sign that a part of you knows deep down that the other person can't cut it, but you're driving yourself into a corner by being in denial (call it a sixth sense).
I only draw this distinction because there are some guys that can make you feel secure, while other guys just make you feel like clinging to them so you don't lose them.
Maybe it's time to date around and see if you tend to smother every guy you date or if it's just with this guy.

In the meantime maybe just keep his number and promise yourself to only call him after you've dated several other people and see if your perspective has changed.
But I predict you won't be holding onto it for long.