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Thread: Dating a Chinese girl with no experience in dating or relationships.

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Sep 2014
    Gender
    Male
    Posts
    9

    Dating a Chinese girl with no experience in dating or relationships.

    I have this co-worker who is a very good looking woman with great charisma, very approachable, friendly and always has this amazing smile on her face.
    I would however not consider her as a complete extrovert, she has a little reserved side to her. She is born and raised in Canada but of Chinese nationality. (I'm pointing out her ethnic origin because some things can be culture related, if there are oriental girls out there I could use your input :p ).

    We have been flirting a little back and forth in the last month or so. Recently she seemed to increase the ''signs''. As an example last week she randomly walked up to my desk and left a little chocolate treat with a friendly note on the the napkin. I thought to myself, I should ask her out. No point in waiting.

    Last friday, I asked her to hang out during our long weekend after she had mentioned not having any plans. She instantly responded no. It was an awkward and strange response (If she wouldn't want then she could easily make up a dull excuse instead of the cold no haha) I quickly changed the convo to something else and we both went back to work. I did this in the presence of a few co-workers who had the possibility to over-hear our conversation, which I didn't seem to be concerned of at the time but one of my (female) co-workers suggested I caught her off guard and she probably didn't know what to answer and could still be interested.

    At this point I had no desire to be rejected twice, so I just sent her a PM on Faceboook saying something to the extent of I hope I didn't put you on the spot before I had no bad intentions. Short message. She later replied saying she thought I was joking when I asked her and said she would like to hangout and is open for anything. I suggested a picnic to which she agreed to. In the convo she hinted that people found her boring. Which was a random comment she made that's worthy of mention.

    We ended up having our pic nic yesterday spent about 4-5 hours in the park having some food, snacks, wine, drinks ...talking, laughing and at least from my perspective enjoying each-other's company. We then went for some Ice cream afterwards, walked around another 30 minutes or so. Ended up spending a good 6 hours together.

    Here are some concerns....
    During this whole time she admitted almost never having a boyfriend before. She said she dated a guy once a few years back and it was very short.
    She admitted she can come across flirtatious with guys, but she is actually being friendly. I'm not sure why she said that, it was a little random and I started wondering if she was referring to me.
    She also mentioned she applied in a university in china and could leave for a year or so as of September is she gets accepted, she got refused in another university there last year.

    We were both leaving by subway after our date and she offered to go up in the middle since we both went opposite directions. From there you can see the trains arrive. When her's came, she said I'll wait for the next one and wait for you'rs to arrive first. I was wondering if she was buying time because she wanted me to kiss her. I normally would have kissed any girl in the same situation but I got scared with her non-experience and some comments she had made and was afraid of her potential reaction.

    I am a little lost to what her interest level is towards me, if she has any expectations or fears...I also wonder what the pace of this relationship should be like with her non-experience...in terms of kissing or getting intimate. Is it possible she only see's me as a friend ?

    I think she's super cool and I like her. I would like things to work out.

    Any advice or comments would be great appreciated.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Nov 2012
    Gender
    Female
    Location
    Sydney
    Posts
    7,055
    Suggest you take her out a few more times. If the good vibes continue, then ask her the questions you're asking us.

    Having said that, if she leaves for uni in September are you willing to wait for a year? Is she willing to wait for a year? It could be a better choice to not start a relationship with someone who could well leave soon.
    Never regret anything that has happened in your life. It cannot be changed, forgotten or undone. So, take it as a lesson learned and move on.

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