My son's girlfriend

**audreyh** · 09-07-15, 12:36 PM

My 16 year old son has a girlfriend he has been dating for 3 monthes and I don't like her at all.Rude and selfish to me.Disrespectful to me and makes fun of me because I am in a wheelchair paralyzed from the waste down,was shot in the back 2 years ago which the bullet went in my spine.I hate it when she calls me "no walk" laughing at me.I am fed up what she is doing to me.My son knows some what is happening between us.I plan on having a talk with him on this.I don't want to hurt his feelings in a bad way and do it right.How should I do it so it's not done in a bad way?

**basilandthyme** · 09-07-15, 02:17 PM

This must be so horrible for you.

Many years ago when I was an thoughtless opinionated teen, my then boyfriend had a word to me on behalf of his mother. I was truly mortified when my behaviour was brought up and I changed immediately. You are doing the right thing both for yourself and for her personal growth.

When you speak with your son, use *I* statements. "I feel _____ when girlfriend says_______ "

Good luck xx

**vashti** · 09-07-15, 02:21 PM

Are you serious? Your problem isn't with his girlfriend; it's with your SON. How can he be interested in dating a girl who treats his mother with such blatant disrespect? I can't even begin to imagine how profoundly messed up your relationship is, that he would tolerate this.

Personally, I would start acting like the grown-up you are, and tell him thee girl is no longer welcome in your home, and that you are taking him for therapy. Not to be unkind, but it sounds like you BOTH need it.

**audreyh** · 09-07-15, 03:41 PM

I can't take her disrespect anymore,her dad is an a-hole and won't talk to me about it.Mom,she does not care either and does not want to do a thing about it.My son and I have a great relationship.His dad can't even take it,disrepects him also

**Wakeup** · 09-07-15, 06:03 PM

Whats up with your son that he allows her to talk to you like that? Has he heard her call you "no walk?" If so what did he do? If he hasn't then what was the situation that she called you that where he wouldn't have heard?

**basilandthyme** · 09-07-15, 10:48 PM

I am thankful that my own teenage rudeness wasn't nearly as bad as the OP's situation!

**audreyh** · 10-07-15, 06:55 PM

We had the talk tonight after supper and used the "I feel ______ when girlfriend says ____________ ".He was good to me and listened very well.He did talk to her about after that,told her that to treat me with respect and no one disrespects me.Said this is her last chance and will dump her if she does not.Said he put me first and will not allow me to be treated with disrespect at all.

**Nicolelong** · 11-07-15, 08:52 AM

That is really nasty!!!!! It shocks me how rude people can be. What is funny about someone needing a wheelchair? I'm glad that you talked with your son and he has relayed the message. Hopefully he will see very soon that this is not a nice girl....

**audreyh** · 11-07-15, 02:13 PM

He broke up with her today and knew she would not change her ways.His now ex does not realize I went through a lot of verbal and physical abuse what my abusive ex husband did to me which is no joke at all.My son is going to take a break on dating thinking things over so this does not happen again.

**basilandthyme** · 11-07-15, 03:09 PM

You have raised a good man

**audreyh** · 11-07-15, 05:20 PM

Originally Posted by basilandthyme

You have raised a good man

Yes,I did and he loves me a lot.Plus his bio dad taught him to be a gentleman,not a coward.Still loves me as a normal mom although I am in a wheelchair now which he has adjusted to very well.Plus he knows I love him for who he is and support him how he expresses himself.One is getting in touch with his en femme side,likes to crossdress part time going by Taylor and has been doing this since he was 5 years old.

**basilandthyme** · 11-07-15, 09:07 PM

Being in a wheelchair doesn't stop you from being a normal mom. You can still provide the love and guidance which a son needs. And kudos to you for being accepting of his non-binary sexuality.

Keep up the good work x

**audreyh** · 12-07-15, 03:19 AM

Originally Posted by basilandthyme

Being in a wheelchair doesn't stop you from being a normal mom. You can still provide the love and guidance which a son needs. And kudos to you for being accepting of his non-binary sexuality.

Keep up the good work x

I have taught him don't let anything bad hold you back in life.We do go out shopping together when he is dressed as Taylor.Does have a job and saves money up.He does help me out a lot also

**megvoh** · 12-07-15, 12:21 PM

If was me I would have banned her from entering my house if she wanted to be such a mouthy rude cunt.
Good your son took your side and dumped her ass, hope his next partner is more respectful and kind.

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