Signs of a Meddling Mother in Law

[fearoflove]

So, I am beginning to see signs of an overly attached mother in law. She is trying to "make suggestions" about the type of wedding I should have, how much I should be spending. And I have a feeling that she is planning to move in with me and my partner when we get a house. My partner has been telling me how his mother doesn't have a good relationship with his dad and that she is planning leave him in the future and how she only has her son left (guilting him to let her move in the future?) and my partner has been reacting negatively to my opinion about not wanting to live with an in law. I also suspect she has been influencing him to hold certain opinions about me and things that impact his decisions as it relates to our relationship because I am beginning to see new opinions from him that I have never heard of and things he never cared about. Knowing my partner's childhood and how sheltered he is because of his over-protective mother, I highly suspect that this is her nature. How do I deal with a meddling mother in law? Meddling mothers in law interferes with relationships and can be a factor in breakups, divorces, etc. I don't want this to happen to my relationship.

[starbar]

I would think its normal for her to have an input on your wedding. She is only giving advice and making suggestions which is what mothers do.. He is her son after all and its his wedding too. We have all heard stories of nightmare mother in laws but from what little you have said here, I don't see any warning signs. How long have you known her?

As far as her living with you then that is something that could happen in any family if a relative is in trouble, needs help or is ill. As long as its only a temporary thing, I would not see it as an issue. My bfs brother came to live with us when he came back from travelling. It was meant to be temporary until he got a job and saved enough to get his own place. He kinda took advantage though as he got a job immediately and had enough money to buy a toolbox worth like 1500 but was not making any plans to leave so when I fell pregnant we told him he has to find his own place