How long is expected before??

[disasterjohn]

Hi,

Been with my g/f for about 3 months now... after about a month and a half she let me masterbate her 3 times in one night.. she had a try at doing it to me too(she didnt seem to do to well). I did it again twice after that after various lengths of time(1-2 weeks apart) but she wont do anything to me anymore.

She said she was alright with it all but I dont think she was ready for it all.

How long do people normally wait before they even try and move on from just kissing and huggling? we are both in our 20's...both virgins and have very little experience between us.

All new to me

John

[Nurseman]

My friend I have to tell you, there is nothing "normal". Each person, each couple have to progress at their own rate. You two will have to find your own.

If she won't "do anything", well thats her perogative. You can't push these things.

Inexperience isn't a bad thing. Just make damn sure nobody gets pregnant.

[gHEXjt]

Everybody is different. But if you think its taking too long then you should talk about it. Find out what she's feeling and then you won't have to wonder whether or not she'll ever be willing to put out.

[disasterjohn]

Nurseman - "do anything" means exactly that... she will let me do all the stuff to her.. but she will just lay there.. wait till she gets her orgasm and then roll over and go to sleep... wont even touch me... anywhere...wont do a thing.. not even say thank you. Im not worried about the inexperience thing... and no one is getting pregnant thats for sure.

gHEXjt - She was willing to "put out" once. First time she has seen me naked and probably the first time she has tried anything on a male... im just worried that she doesnt like me physically now that she has seen "what i got to offer".

[gHEXjt]

Nurseman - "do anything" means exactly that... she will let me do all the stuff to her.. but she will just lay there.. wait till she gets her orgasm and then roll over and go to sleep... wont even touch me... anywhere...wont do a thing.. not even say thank you. Im not worried about the inexperience thing... and no one is getting pregnant thats for sure.

gHEXjt - She was willing to "put out" once. First time she has seen me naked and probably the first time she has tried anything on a male... im just worried that she doesnt like me physically now that she has seen "what i got to offer".

You were butt-naked for a handy? Anyway, I've given this advice before, just tell her your going to take her on a little exploration, take her hand, and whip it out. See what she does. However, you may get slapped.

Just talk to her, like I said before. It can't hurt.

[disasterjohn]

Ive tried to talk to her about stuff... first thing i get it is "I've never had this issue with my other boyfriends , I dont know what to say, and all we do is talk about this stuff".

I got this feeling shes just not ready for a relationship.

[Lloyd95]

Is she ugly?

[disasterjohn]

no way! well... I dont think she is. Not sure what other people think about her. Her other boyfriend were when she was in high school...and I dont think anythign happened apart from they just hung out with each other.

[gHEXjt]

Well then obviously she never had this kind of problem with previous boyfriends. Just show her what to do, or make it happen yourself, if she is so apprehensive about it.

[disasterjohn]

As nurseman said... I shouldnt really push it... but im just confused how she can let me do stuff to her if shes apprehensive about it all.

[gHEXjt]

Well that's not fair. So if she's not going to put out, you shouldn't either. Then when she's not getting any, she may be willing.

[disasterjohn]

true... that did cross my mind.. but if shes happy not to get it.. then nothing will happen either way. hehe. I will leave it for a few weeks and see what she does. If nothing improves.. then im going to end it. Im slowly losing everything I felt for her at the start... but I spose you dont know what they are going to be like till you start spending time with them

[shh!]

Has she got some sort of religious objection? Cause if she is religious, she may not want to do anything with you until she is married...

I have to say though, that as a woman I find it odd that she'd be willing to allow you to pleasure her when she is unwilling to reciprocate. If anything, the situation is usually reversed.

[disasterjohn]

shh! - tell me about it.. thats why im so confused about the whole situation. Normally its the male that gets sleepy and rolls over and goes to sleep... which I hate and would never do....not really sure what to do. and no shes not religious. She unwilling to reciprocate for alot of things actually...such as tell me how she feels for me etc. "Just assume everything is fine till I say so". *shrugs*. I love her to pieces...but thats slowly fading.

[disasterjohn]

Well.... this is what I did. I told her that I was going to hold back on all things romantic/intimate till she could show me she was ready for it.

She said that shes not sure about the romance part cause she never had it..... to me that says shes got no clue about what the word romantic means.. hehe.. poor girl.

She didnt talk or hint about anything to do with the intimancy part. I think shes still just unsure about it all.

I told her that I was telling her this cause i didnt want her thinking there was anything wrong and if she wasnt ready for it all that it wasnt a bad thing. Its all up to her to think about it and decide what she wants to do.

Spose now its up to me to just wait and see what she does... for how long.... time will tell i spose. i know she wont talk to me about it.... wait and see... =\