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Thread: Messed up guy

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Aug 2015
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    Messed up guy

    Hello,

    let me make this post to introduce myself, I'll try to make it short.

    I'm a guy, I have 33 years, I think I should be someone stable in my relationships but I'm not. During my life I had about 5 serious relationships. Only one of them lasted for a long time (about 6 years) that was also my first relationship. All the other relationships lasted a little more or less 1 year.

    I always thought that it didn't work with the first because she had a strange temper, the second because we were very different, ... I always found some reason why it didn't workout...and I always thought I should find someone more "like me"..someone without "those things" that I knew that made things not work... I'm dating my current girlfriend for about 4 months, she's great, she's beautiful, very nice person, nothing wrong...I felt super cute with her, I like being with her...but.. I'm already feeling like I'm sabotaging things...

    I kind of miss being on my own... looking at an open road and just going... I used to do that... I feel like I'm pushing her away and I don't even know why. I think I do this with all my girlfriends... And specially this girl... she does not deserve that.

    I don't know what type of advice I should ask... I'm just putting this here in hope that someone identifies with it...relates to it...and can share something that who knows...might help me to know and understand this part of me better.

    Thank you All for reading.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    May 2011
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    Me thinks that You'd do well on an online dating site.
    “The willingness to accept responsibility for one’s own life is the source from which self-respect springs.” ~Joan Didion

  3. #3
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    I don't really know why, but it kinda felt good to read your post Wakeup.

    Could you please elaborate a little more on the reason why you say that?

    Thanks!

  4. #4
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    Because I think the majority of people who online date find reasons to not be in serious relationships with one another. With online you can search for people that are looking for ongoing, casual situations.

    If you're not wanting anything serious with this new girl then do her the kindness and give her the benefit of being informed so that she can decide whether or not she wants to be with someone who isn't ready to be with her.

    Nothing wrong with you liking female company but not wanting to be tied down. You just have to be honest with whom you want to keep company with is all. It's only fair that who has decided to continue on with you has made an informed decision to do so.

    Good luck.
    “The willingness to accept responsibility for one’s own life is the source from which self-respect springs.” ~Joan Didion

  5. #5
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    Thank you

    I do believe you are mostly right in what you wrote. I just wish I didn't go all the way when my relationships start. I always live them 200% committed, with 300% of certainty that it is what I wan't, but then... it slides.....

    Thank you for your answer wakeup.

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