Help?

[edb18]

Hey!

I'm completely new to this! I'm hoping to find a sympathetic ear who won't judge me too much haha.

So...

I was with my ex boyfriend for 5 years. I can honestly say he was my first love. Never felt anything like that for anyone else before or after him.
We split up in 2012. I was absolutely devastated. I found out he was seeing another girl pretty much straight away and had been talking to her whilst we were together. Anyway, a few months past and he absolutely hated me. I tried to talk, tried to be friendly but he didn't want to know. So I just left it.

A while passed and I thought that was it. Then he got back in touch early 2013 wanting to talk. Talk soon led to flirting and then led to sex.
I was pretty stupid as he had told me he was waiting to get with someone else. Deep down I knew it was a bad idea cause I still loved him. Anyway, we had sex a few times then he pretty much just cut me off. Stopped talking to me.

So I moved on. I met a lovely guy and although we aren't together, we had a few dates and we still talk daily after 2 years of knowing each other. Pretty sure he doesn't want a relationship though he was the first person I had feelings for since my ex.

Anyway, again, my ex got in touch in late 2014 and again, it turned to flirting. A lot of flirting. We didn't meet up though.

He made it appear that he'd split up with the girl he was currently seeing so I thought I was doing no harm by flirting back.
Then the same happened again... he just cut off all contact. I was gutted cause I wanted to be friends with him.

So a few months have again passed and he's in touch with me again. I met up with him and things happened. However, he now says he feels guilty as there is a girl he's been seeing.

I'm so, so confused! Why does he keep coming back?? Even when nothing sexual happens, he STILL chooses to come back and I never instigate it.

So so confused right now plus I seem to have developed feelings for him again which makes it an even bigger mess!!
Help?

[solarion]

STOP communicating with him. He's just using you as a backup plan. While he still cares about you, he likely does not respect you and he does not see you as a viable partner. What you're doing to each other is keeping one another in limbo where neither of you are able to move on. Stop trying to be his friend and just get him out of your system.

[Wakeup]

Hey!

I'm completely new to this! I'm hoping to find a sympathetic ear who won't judge me too much haha.

So...

I was with my ex boyfriend for 5 years. I can honestly say he was my first love. Never felt anything like that for anyone else before or after him.
We split up in 2012. I was absolutely devastated. I found out he was seeing another girl pretty much straight away and had been talking to her whilst we were together. Anyway, a few months past and he absolutely hated me. I tried to talk, tried to be friendly but he didn't want to know. So I just left it.

A while passed and I thought that was it. Then he got back in touch early 2013 wanting to talk. Talk soon led to flirting and then led to sex.
I was pretty stupid as he had told me he was waiting to get with someone else. Deep down I knew it was a bad idea cause I still loved him. Anyway, we had sex a few times then he pretty much just cut me off. Stopped talking to me.

So I moved on. I met a lovely guy and although we aren't together, we had a few dates and we still talk daily after 2 years of knowing each other. Pretty sure he doesn't want a relationship though he was the first person I had feelings for since my ex.

Anyway, again, my ex got in touch in late 2014 and again, it turned to flirting. A lot of flirting. We didn't meet up though.

He made it appear that he'd split up with the girl he was currently seeing so I thought I was doing no harm by flirting back.
Then the same happened again... he just cut off all contact. I was gutted cause I wanted to be friends with him.

So a few months have again passed and he's in touch with me again. I met up with him and things happened. However, he now says he feels guilty as there is a girl he's been seeing.

I'm so, so confused! Why does he keep coming back?? Even when nothing sexual happens, he STILL chooses to come back and I never instigate it.

So so confused right now plus I seem to have developed feelings for him again which makes it an even bigger mess!!
Help?

I'm so, so confused! Why does he keep coming back?? Even when nothing sexual happens, he STILL chooses to come back and I never instigate it.

Well, surely you jest? You can't seriously be confused, right? I mean he contacts you every once in a while to see if you think so little of yourself that you'd fvck him again when he's between chicks that he actually wants to have a relationship with.

Ouch! Right?

Sorry, but that's the truth. You teach people how to treat you and when you so readily allowed him to treat you like a place to cum when he's between chicks, you taught him to keep you hooked in case his well of women runs dry.

Don't enable him to be the using fvcktard that he is. If you're too weak to cut off contact all together because his crumbs of contact give you an ego boost... then just read his shit and then completely ignore him. ZERO replies to his attempts to keep you mired in his crap. He doesn't love you in the least and you waste your emotions on him. Not only that, by keeping him in your life, you are stagnating yourself from finding a good man that won't treat you like a cum bucket... How can you be open enough in mind and heart to see the promise in any new prospect when he's taking up those spaces in you?

Close the bloody door on him and move on, sister. You deserve more... surely you believe that of yourself?