has he even ever liked me

**Kpth** · 02-01-16, 07:52 AM

I met a guy during my uni in abroad through my flatmates. I never liked him and hardly reply his fb message. My flatmate once told me that he said I broke his heart for not replying his messages. He enjoy taking my pictures during trips. He helped me moving out. But I never liked him back. He once told me his parents are coming and ask me to see with them. I didn't know what to say but my facial expression upset him. After that we lost contact moving back to our countries

Last may he ask me to attend an event in his country saying just because he wants to see me. I had to refuse it cos I couldn't take leave from my work.

last November I happened to visit his country for work. He flew from another city to show me around his city. I don't know why but I was so happy to see him again.

He fb messaged me a few times after the trip. But after that i was the one who started the conversations. He replied him happily but only when I texted him.

I feel sad. I don't want to keep my hopes up but I already told him I'm coming back this april. I'm so scared sth disappointing will happen like my previous relationship. Can you please tell me what I should do? What steps shall I take to know more about him.

**benfletcher82** · 02-01-16, 10:25 AM

I don't exactly understand. You said you don't like him in the same way he likes you, so do you want to continue the friendship or do you want to start a relationship with the guy but are scared of disappointment?

**Kpth** · 02-01-16, 05:41 PM

Originally Posted by benfletcher82

I don't exactly understand. You said you don't like him in the same way he likes you, so do you want to continue the friendship or do you want to start a relationship with the guy but are scared of disappointment?

Sorry for the confusion. I need to know more about him. I like him a lot but I'm scared that I'm just reading it wrong. I'm afraid that he has never been interested in me. Thanks for your patience to read my long post.

**drleo** · 03-01-16, 02:55 AM

due to your story he has always been interested in you if he invited to attend an invent in his country and you did not then you went there and he flew from his state to come and show around that prove a point but if it doesn't satisfy you then put your fears a side and go find out your self if he isn't interested in you or call him and ask him nicely you will get your answer

**Kpth** · 04-01-16, 07:18 AM

Originally Posted by drleo

due to your story he has always been interested in you if he invited to attend an invent in his country and you did not then you went there and he flew from his state to come and show around that prove a point but if it doesn't satisfy you then put your fears a side and go find out your self if he isn't interested in you or call him and ask him nicely you will get your answer

it's nice to hear your response. At least I'm not over interpreting. I will just go with the flow and find out what will happen. I will try to know him more. Will keep you posted on it after april. For the time being thanks a million for your reply.

**Wakeup** · 04-01-16, 04:31 PM

Seems you only like him when he's too far away to actually be a proper boyfriend. What were you afraid of when he was living close to you?

**Kpth** · 05-01-16, 02:05 AM

Originally Posted by Wakeup

Seems you only like him when he's too far away to actually be a proper boyfriend. What were you afraid of when he was living close to you?

I'm glad you point that out. We didn't meet until two months before graduation and so I just thought he was looking for a part time lover as my last relationship was like that. But in contrast he didn't change his sincerity though I never showed him any interest like the other guys did. I must say I regret it but as I say I'm afraid of getting hurt.

**TheEvilJester** · 05-01-16, 08:23 AM

First, let me preface this to say that none of us can tell you for sure. We can't read his mind. However, given your story, here would be my interpretation....

Yes, I think he did like you. What may have happened, though, is that he sensed your lack of interest and has now moved on. Does that mean it is too late? Maybe, but maybe not. Honestly, all you can do is give it a shot and hope it goes well. It seems like he liked you at some point, so maybe there is still a chance if he now sees that you are interested as well. Just don't dedicate too much time to it. If you keep trying and now the roles are reversed where he doesn't seem to show interest, then after a while it may be best to just move on.

That said, how far apart do you two live? IF you did start dating, is it even conceivable for you two to be able to be together often? Not that they are impossible, but long distance relationships can be very hard.

**Kpth** · 06-01-16, 05:06 AM

Originally Posted by TheEvilJester

First, let me preface this to say that none of us can tell you for sure. We can't read his mind. However, given your story, here would be my interpretation....

Yes, I think he did like you. What may have happened, though, is that he sensed your lack of interest and has now moved on. Does that mean it is too late? Maybe, but maybe not. Honestly, all you can do is give it a shot and hope it goes well. It seems like he liked you at some point, so maybe there is still a chance if he now sees that you are interested as well. Just don't dedicate too much time to it. If you keep trying and now the roles are reversed where he doesn't seem to show interest, then after a while it may be best to just move on.

That said, how far apart do you two live? IF you did start dating, is it even conceivable for you two to be able to be together often? Not that they are impossible, but long distance relationships can be very hard.

Wow.. thank you so much for your detail reply. We both are from ASEAN countries. So I must say quite easy to travel and meet except that we are both busy with our job. My mom recently moved there which I made an excuse to visit him coming April. He said it's good that he got see me quite often. So I'm taking it as a not-so-bad sign. I'm not so good with flirting but I do really like him and hopefully I will be able to sort everything out soon.

**TheEvilJester** · 06-01-16, 07:25 AM

Okay. Sounds like you are within a reasonable traveling distance, then. Well, so again, just do your best to drop hints and see if he picks up on them. If he doesn't seem to, maybe even just try asking him out rather than hoping he asks you. In fact, under these specific circumstances, I might even lean towards saying you just ask him out without even waiting to see if he asks you. Reason being, you mention that he already sort of tried in the past and you weren't really interested. So, could be he wouldn't want to bother again, thinking that you just aren't interested in him in that way. So, maybe you just ask him out and see how that goes.

But, whatever makes you most comfortable. Again, don't waste too much time pursuing it. As long as you actually do take some action to see if there could be something between you two, don't wait around too long if nothing does happen. Too many fish in the sea, so to speak, to waste too much time waiting for one. Good luck to you.

(P.S. If you thought THAT response was detailed, you should see some of my other responses in this message board. LOL!)

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