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Thread: I'm in love with my best friend, he is in love with me, but we have a problem?

  1. #1
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    I'm in love with my best friend, he is in love with me, but we have a problem?

    The problem - his ex best male friend.

    Background story- I met this guy, let's call him "B", in 2013. Dated for a few months. Then he broke it off with me. Tried getting his best male friend to go out with me. He ended up falling in love with me. B and I stayed best friends but things got worse. His friend tried going out with me, then B went behind my back saying mean things about me to his ex best friend, I guess to try to get him to stop pursuing me and get me back. Things got really bad in November/December 2015. I ended up "auto rejecting" his number so he wouldn't ruin my holiday. I decided to give the other guy a chance. Even though B was mean towards me, I was acting different towards him too. We were being stupid.

    Fast forward a month later I see a phone call from B (my phone showed auto rejected calls). I wasn't going to call back but I did. B then apologized hundreds of times to me, then was saying I miss you and I love you which he never done before. B even told me about a dream he had that scared him, which was me cursing at him and hitting him in painful places for men screaming "stay out of my life". In the dream I did the same 20 years later when we bumped into each other minus the hitting. After telling me the dream and getting off the phone, he told me he cried for 15 minutes. We decided to meet up at our school so I can help him with homework. The minute B saw me, he wanted to kiss me, hug me, kept saying I missed you and I love you. He even kissed me on the lips but apologized, even though I'm sort of with the other guy, I told B he did nothing wrong because honestly, I'm in love with B not his ex best male friend. I cry every night. We admitted we were being stupid and im supposed to see B tomorrow. I think we wasted a lot of time that we could of been together. I don't know what to do. I really don't want to be with his ex friend. I can't even kiss the guy but I can kiss B and do other things with him.

    His ex friend is a great guy but I'm not happy and I don't want to pretend no more. Help? b and I feel so stupid for wasting time we could of been together

  2. #2
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    I want to ask one thing, how old are you?

    Not to freak you out. At a certain stage of out life, around 16-21, we meet someone who is 'the one'. At this age we are often emotionally volatile and confused. If you read many (real life) love stories, these people often break up, only to REGRET IT, BIG TIME.

    Since you mentioned being at school, I guess you are in this category. I say that you and 'B' should do whatever you can to stay together, because a guy doesn't cry like that over any girl.

    There are so many people in the age group 25 - 70+ that live every day like a boring routine, and deep in their heart they miss someone they once knew, their first love, their true love.

    There are many stories on the internet of people in their 30's, 40's and 50's, divorcing people who they've been married to for years, just because they found their first love on facebook and are getting reunited. You can google 're united love stories' or 'reunited love stories' and find them for yourself.

    You may want 'B' to read them with you and hopefully, he'll understand too.

    Since you said "I really don't want to be with his ex friend" but if you both sit down and explain to him then you should be alright, because it sounds like you should be with 'B'
    Last edited by SeptemberBaby; 19-01-16 at 06:53 PM.

  3. #3
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    I wouldn't hesitate to tell the guy you don't want to be with that you don't want to be with him. It's not only unfair to you but to him as well. We all get broken hearts, it's a part of life...if you need to be with your B then be done with the breakup as quick as possible so they have more time to heal and get over you.

  4. #4
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    Quote Originally Posted by swtairen View Post
    if you need to be with your B then be done with the breakup as quick as possible so they have more time to heal and get over you.
    Nice advice by swtairen
    Online Dating Scam Stories & to file complaints against cheaters and liars, visit
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  5. #5
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    Let's get real here, dreams mean absolutely nothing. He may have cried over you, but it's equally plausible that he lied about that to coerce you into getting back together with him. I'm not saying you should jump the gun and apply such nefarious credit to him, but if he treated you like sh*t before, it's doubtful that he will have truly changed enough to not treat you like sh*t again. If you feel that being with B is the right choice, by all means, go for it; but I think you need to pay attention to the logistics of this situation, and try not to put so much gravity into making decisions based on your emotions.

    Having said that, clearly you don't want to be with the guy you are currently with. So you need to break up with him before you even consider moving on with another person.

    Best of luck to you! I hope you are able to figure this out so you can be happy.
    "Caring is not an advantage."

  6. #6
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    Remove urself from everything

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