Is he overreacting?

**Geek2021** · 13-02-16, 01:14 PM

I want to know if people think my husband is overreacting or if I'm in the wrong here.
So we have been married for 3 years and I don't have very many friends. So I got in contact with someone that I hadn't seen in a long time.
We have been friends for over 7 years. We started to hang out and then I made a big mistake and had an affair with him.
I have talked with my husband about this and all was well but he told me to stop seeing or talking with him.
He's a great friend so I didn't want to stop having him as a friend. And its not like anything is going to happen again because we had a talk about it and we are just friends.
so I decided to keep in touch with my friend. About 5 months after the affair I started hanging out with him again. We just talk and smoke cigs and chill.
Anyway my husband found out and is furious. He just doesn't get it that he is such a long time good friend of mine and I don't want to give him up.
He said I need to choose between my husband or my friend and I told him I'm not going to give up my friend because my husband can't trust me anymore.
If he would just trust me everything would be fine.
Do you agree he is overreacting?

**Rebeccaa** · 15-02-16, 01:35 AM

Hello Geek2021
Reading this as a total outsider i would have to say that I 100% agree with your husband.
You say you hadn't seen this guy in a long time and then all of a sudden you sound inseparable and in fact you were unfaithful to your husband and had an affair. I can't comprehend why you think your husband should be okay with you continuing to see this guy.
You have also said yourself that you 'don't want to give him up' - that in itself indicates that you have feelings for him. If you want to save your marriage you will have to give up seeing this guy and even then you will have some bridge building to do to earn the trust of your husband again.
I'm sorry if this sounds harsh. Put yourself in the shoes of your husband and stop thinking about this guy. You can't have your cake and eat it too.

**lovesickheart** · 15-02-16, 06:03 PM

I also agree 100% with your husband. You should leave this other guy alone for good. Seriously? You cant see that?

**Geek2021** · 16-02-16, 02:06 PM

thanks for all the replies I have decided to remove this other guy from my contacts.

**AmIaFool** · 23-02-16, 09:39 AM

I hope you remove him from your life too! There's no room in an exclusive relationship for an extra person.

**sabaazam** · 23-02-16, 09:23 PM

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